Questions to ask my 6 year old about her impressions of the homebirth...? Input Please!

[misseks]

We welcomed our fourth daughter last week.  It was a lovely idyllic homebirth.  The two oldest girls are 6 and almost 5, and they played downstairs with Grandma and were invited up as soon as baby was born, and witnessed the cord cutting, but left the room for the delivery of the placenta.

They are a bit anxious when there is so much activity in the house, the midwives and the student midwife and the coming and going and all the energy in the air....now that things have settled down, I'd like to get an honest, intuitive impression of the birth from my six year old homeschooler (and maybe the almost five year old too!) but need some advice.

What are non-leading questions that I can ask and then record their answers?  What is an age appropriate activity (not too much writing) that they can do to celebrate and commemorate?  (we have done a lot of nice quiet things, like hanging balloons outside the house, and there have been poeple coming and going with meals and such...) What is a good way to let them know that I am so proud of them for being here, and for being  a part of the process, even though it seems like they may have been a bit oblivious to all the ins and outs?

How long should I let it all process? Am I missing an important part of including them?  Thanks in advance!

[phathui5]

You could ask her if she wants to draw or paint a picture about when she first saw the baby.

If I were asking questions and writing down their answers, I might ask things like:

"What were you doing when Mama was birthing the baby?"

"Tell me what you remember about seeing the new baby."

"Who was here when the baby was born? What did they do?"

"What things are you going to teach the baby?"

[OTMomma]

Congrats!  I agree that having them draw a picture or paint one is a great idea.   Asking "What did you think of the baby's birth?"  might get some interesting answers. 

My younger 2 were both born at home, and my oldest dd was present for each time. Each child we welcomed in a different way.  I think the most important thing we did was a take lots of pictures that we can look back at and talk about later.  I just finished making a photo book of my youngest child's first year, so we all talked about her birth again.  My oldest likes to tell details of that birth story- how the baby was born while I was sitting on a ball, and how she cut the cord.  We took pictures of all 3 of my kids together when the new baby was about 5 days old, and used those to make photo birth announcements- we took lots and lots of pictures that day trying to get 3 kids to all look at the camera- and somehow I think that helped cement for the kids this addition to our family. The birth announcements had pictures of all 3 kids together, so it was about our family, not just the new baby. 

[AAK]

If you simply pay attention to their play, you might find out a lot.  After my 3rd was born (sisters were 3 and 6 at the time) I was witness to lots of pretend play involving giving birth.  It was cool to see.  

And now, five years later (on the 28th), we were remembering that birth and I found the memories of the girls interesting.  The child who was 3 (now 8) said, "mom, if Maya was born in the morning, why did I make you a sandwich?".  I found it amusing that she remembered the sandwich at all.  She also remembered sitting with me while I labored in the birthing tub.  Between the two of them, they remembered a lot. 

Amy