Originally Posted by swede
Well, people keep satying babies are disruptive. I say not all are. So waht is the problem? If a baby is quiet, what difference does it make? REally?
I think the difference it makes (theoretically, not saying I necessarily agree or disagree) is setting a precedent. Baby A never makes a peep & so is allowed in class. Baby B has severe colick so is not allowed in class. But what about Baby C, who occasionally coos & gurgles, or Baby D, who only cries for a second or two when wet or something, and Baby E, who is quite most days but hates when the class next door watches a movie? How do you determine what's acceptable, when it's not as clear-cut? How do you tell the mom of Baby C that her baby isn't allowed because she made a peep one day? And it's so subjective... what is 'quiet & non-disruptive" to the mom? How about to the professor? And what about to the other students??
I made arrangements with my job to be able to work from home full-time when my son was born. This was a HUGE deal to get them to agree, and I almost became unemployed because of it (a risk I was willing but terrified to take!) I definitely had a sense of 'entitlement' about it because in a perfect world, I do feel babies should be accommodated in most work/school environments, with appropriate supports. It wasn't so much about, "I am entitled to work full-time & care for my DS full-time simultaneously" but more, "this is what my DS & I need, so I need to find a way to make it happen" -- so maybe 'entitlement' isn't quite the right word, but anyway. The other idea I threw out to my bosses was bringing DS with me to work. They thought that was hilarious so obviously we didn't get too far with that discussion. DS was VERY high-needs so it wouldn't have worked out anyway. But the work-from-home thing has worked great, and I wish more companies/schools/etc. would be willing to try that out with certain employees. It's hard because there are some people who simply aren't good candidates for working/schooling at home for whatever reason -- poor work ethic, frequent client contact, laboratory work, etc. -- so then it starts to feel 'unfair' that some employees 'get' to work from home & others don't. It's a tricky situation & looking back, I can empathize much more with my employer than I could at the time.
I also had to attend a couple of long meetings at work when DS was younger... DH took those days off from work & hung out nearby my workplace so DS could nurse as needed. It worked out fine, and I see no reason why this wouldn't work for the OP (though obviously I don't know all the details of her situation!) It was also good bonding time for DH & DS because I was otherwise reluctant to be away from him while he was so little. I don't know how heavy your course load or how long your classes are, OP, but if it's only an hour or two a few days a week, I don't see that being detrimental to your baby, especially if you can step out as necessary to nurse. It's awkward at first (imagine being in a small business meeting with your company's most important client, going over critical information, and having to discreetly sneak out to nurse!) and was hard on me to be away from DS at all, but it's doable and it's not as big a deal as I thought it would be.
OK I could probably go on forever about this... I have very mixed feelings on the issue but I really feel for you, OP, and I hope you can figure out a good solution. Don't let this stress get in the way of enjoying your pregnancy & birth!! :) You will find a way to work things out, just keep an open mind & be creative if you need to!