Am I the only one NOT interested in schedules?

[luckiest]

I feel like I'm the odd (wo)man out on this whole "putting your baby on a schedule" thing.  There is SO much info on how to get your baby to take longer naps, sleep through the night, stretch out time between feeds, etc.  Reading it actually stresses me out, I'm like oh goodness, should he be taking longer naps?!  Is it a problem that he nurses every 2 hours?

He is 8.5 weeks old and on no predictable wake/sleep/feed pattern whatsoever, other than that between 11pm and about 8am he goes straight back to sleep between feeds.  Some days he takes a few longer (2 hour) naps, some days (like today) he only cat-naps for 30 minutes at a time.  Sometimes he wants to be awake after he nurses, sometimes he goes to sleep for a bit and has some awake time before he's hungry again.  In general, he eats every 2 hours, maybe every 3 at night.  On several occasions he goes longer 4-5 hour stretches between feeds, but it's really rare.  Sometimes he only takes one breast and nurses even more often, closer to every hour.  

I really don't have a problem with the unpredictability!  Sometimes it makes things a little more difficult, not knowing whether or not I have time to eat lunch during a nap, for example.  I think it makes it easier to do things out of the house, because I'm not worrying about messing with his schedule or anything.  He depends on me (and a pacifier) to be put to sleep, and I certainly don't see a problem with that.  I don't know, I guess I just follow his lead on everything.  And I guess I figure that he's two months old!  That just seems too young to me to start manipulating his needs pattern.  I figure when he's older he'll settle into his own sort of routing.  He won't be five years old wanting to nurse every two hours!

I'm sure I would be singing a different tune if I had a baby who was awake all night and slept all day; I'd be getting my hands on every sleep book out there.  But excepting bigger issues like that, I don't see the problem with letting him do his thing when he wants to do it.

[FarrenSquare]

No, you are not alone! I am definitely not concerned about a schedule at ALL!

Maybe it is easier for me than other because he is my first babe, but I pretty much just follow his natural schedule unless we have somewhere to be and I have to wake him earlier to get out the door. For a while he wasn't going down for the night until 1am and I literally laughed out loud when my mom told me I should "change that." Seriously? He is just over 2 months old! Why should I change it if it works for us?

He eats when he is hungry, I put him to sleep when he is sleepy, we play when he is awake. Yes it is hard to make plans around him, and some days I'd love to know there was a 2 hour nap in our future, but for the most part I am happy seeing how he schedules himself. I trust in him to tell me what he needs, and I trust that he will start showing consistency sooner or later.

[LittleBirdy]

I don't think you can even get a 2 month old on a schedule, IMHO.  And if you do... next week it will change!

Even now with DS being six months old I wouldn't say he is on a schedule... more that the times when he wants to eat/sleep/poop have become fairly predictible and I just have to honor that.  I didn't do it, I don't think... I just responded to his cues. 

[Knitting Mama]

At 8 weeks old, frankly, I'd be more concerned if you did have a set schedule. To me, the first 3 months is that "fourth trimester" that babies so desperately need, but that we can't give them inside-- so we give it to them outside. The fact that listening to your baby's needs comes naturally to you is a wonderful thing.

Disclaimer: In a way, we sort of did do a schedule, but it wasn't one in the traditional sense. At your baby's age, my Cecilia just couldn't handle being awake for more than about an hour. When she started acting tired, we had already passed the point of no return and she'd be overly tired and cranky, cranky, cranky. So I would start getting her ready for her nap at about 50 minutes of awake time and start nursing her down just before that hour of awake time. 99% of the time she went straight down with no fuss, so for her, a "schedule" worked. It wasn't until she was over 6 months that she started to stay awake for longer stretches and her sleepy cues became accurate (as in, she wasn't overly tired already when she started showing signs of being tired). So we did both a sort of schedule AND listened to her cues.

[cocoanib]

My life is'nt really on a schedule, so no way I could put her on one.

Every now and again we kind of fall into one though, when things are consistent and that's fine.

Somehow we survive without a "set" one though.

[Unlikely Mama]

I wasn't interested in a schedule until DD was about 5mo. And while she still isn't on a "schedule" per se, I have found (like a PP) that she is much happier when I honor her need to sleep on a child-appropriate basis instead of the more convenient adult time frame. This often means a pre-6pm bedtime for her.

[newmamalizzy]

At that age I never even thought about my baby's "schedule."  We did have a routine of sorts by that time, but it was governed by DD's needs, and I fit in some activities in between.  Nowadays, I am much more aware of DD's schedule, but it has always been primarily baby-led.   I think the big change for us occurred when DD started having napping trouble at 3 - 4 months old.  It's lovely to think of a happy-go-lucky, unscheduled world, but my baby really does thrive with regularity and routine based around my perception of her needs.  We change things up when they're not working for her anymore, and I try hard to always listen when she's trying to tell me that she's ready for a more mature way of doing things.  Things can be pretty loosy-goosy during these interim periods.  Once we have the new pattern figured out, though, she really relies on me to "enforce" it.  You sound like you're doing just fine listening to your baby ad helping him settle into the world.  My advice - ditch those books and only go back to them when you're feeling like there's a problem because you're right - all that conflicting advice can be VERY confusing. 

[SilverFish]

i think "schedules" or more appropriately, "routines" make things easier for everyone, at least after the 4th trimester. when your baby is still so young, they do tend to just more naturally go with the flow... they sleep when they're tired, eat when they're hungry.

after about 5 or 6 months, it gets a bit more complicated. they might be really tired, but if you're out somewhere really busy and interesting, they aren't going to be able to sleep. they might be peckish, but again, they do get much more caught up in their activities and their surroundings, so they (and you) might miss their hunger cues until it's melt down time. so yeah, in the newborn stage, i wasn't even thinking about the time or how long it had been since the last nap... but now, with an 11 month old, our days really need to be much more structured or both mama and baby tend to have melt-downs. it is nice for both of us to know what is coming next and approximately how long it'll be.

she is quite a bit of work these days... it's impossible to get us both washed, fed, dressed, pottied, napped and ready for outings without having some kind of predictable schedule. if we have a playgroup meeting at 1pm, i know she needs to go down for a nap at 10:30 am so i have time to shower and make us both lunch and pack a diaper bag... i know she'll probably wake up at 12pm which gives me time to feed her and change her diaper before needing to get out the door. without that structure, the whole day would collapse. i mean, if we have days where that doesn't work, fine... we can definitely work with that. and there's only so hard i'll 'work' to get her to sleep at a certain time. not every day is structured around the clock like that either, but i definitely prefer the days that are, as we are both much happier and more productive.

[octobermom]

 I don't mind "schedules" what I do mind are arbutiary ones that take no consideration into natural ebb and flow and age appropiatness of a child nor fit any part of the adults lifes as well.  I do right from the start (or pretty soon) do little simple things to help establish some sense of a rountinue and both our children have fallen into comfortable rountinues with in a short amount of time.. thant and frankly life also diticates some tweeking of the days that kids do adjust too. But I dont worry if its liek the books say I don't worry if we need to change things I dont manuplate use CIO or other methods to achieve it...

Deanna 

[ABMama]

I find as the babies grow up that you will get into more of a "routine" vs. schedule. 

For example, for the first 3-6 mos the baby will eat when they want to eat, sleep when they want to sleep etc... but as they hit the 9 month mark you should begin to notice when it is easier to feed (when they are hungry for soilds vs. milk), when they nap (usually 3 big ones) and when they want to play...and you will change your day according to this. 

As they get older they drop the 3 naps for 2 and then the 2 for 1 big one and on and on. 

And then when they are 5years old, you will have a pretty great routine going on! lol. Wake up, breakfast, snack, lunch, nap, snack, dinner, snack, bed.

[Calliope84]

I have started thinking about having a routine that I do just so I remember to do stuff (Get up, change baby, interact with baby, take out dog, make coffee.. etc.)

DD is putting herself on a sort of schedule recently. She seems to need to go to bed by 8:30pm and she always wakes to eat around 4:30 and ALWAYS poops exactly at 7am and eats. Then sometimes we fall asleep again until 9 or 10. I am quite happy with this. I feed her sometimes every hour during the day and have no problem with it. She will eat for a few minutes and that is it. Keeps her happy and she is usually with me and being worn anyway!

[sk8boarder15]

Originally Posted by Calliope84 

DD is putting herself on a sort of schedule recently. She seems to need to go to bed by 8:30pm and she always wakes to eat around 4:30 and ALWAYS poops exactly at 7am and eats. 

WOW Sounds EXACTLY Like my DS! We are always up at 4 or 4:30 for a long feed (I watch king of the hill at that time...) and then up at 7, 7:20 at the latest and eats and poops first thing in the morning. :) 

At 8 weeks I wouldn't worry at all about a schedule! We are just trying to get somewhat of a routine at 4 months, just in hopes he will sleep better at night if he gets regular naps during the day. But I don't think babies are capable of being on a schedule, and as soon as they are something messes it up, like sickness, or teething. So a general routine when they are older might be a good idea, but a schedule at 2 months seems impossible to me.