Hello! I am so happy to jump in here at the mothering.com forums. I am a stay at home mommy in an area where that is kinda rare... well sorta... hmmm maybe I should just post an intro, since its complicated.
My name is Miranda and I am very pleased to meet you all! I'm 37 and have been married 16 years to the peanut butter to my jelly, my wonderful husband James. (who will turn 50 this year!) We have seven precious children with one, our last, on the way. When I got married I was blessed with two beautiful step children, Jimmy (25) and Tiffany (23). Next came Reagan (14), Paloma (11), Dylan (9), Lorelei (5) and Nathaniel (2/32 mos) and I am currently just over 8 weeks pregnant. When I was my oldest child's age my life plan didn't include marriage, homemaking and lots of children but deep down it was always my secret wish!
I am an only child and my parents are/were career oriented, very A type personalities. I was very driven in school and I had planned on law school and finance. There was, however, someone very influential in my life, my dear grandmother. She was technically my step grandmother, but I have always subscribed to the principle that "Its not who brings you into the world, its who loves you while you are here." Mary was southern, maternal and a homekeeper if ever there was one. I always say she taught me 99.9% of what I needed to know in life! Though I didn't set out to follow in her footsteps.
I met my James while summer interning and as the weeks passed I learned to respect him, but never really gave a thought to romance. Four days before I was headed back to college I ran into him in a little coffee shop while finally taking a moment to explore the city. He offered to share a table and we spent the afternoon just talking and waiting out an unexpected summer shower or was it that neither of us wanted to leave the others company? He made me laugh like no one else ever had or has since. A year later he proposed and we talked about what we both wanted from the marriage. I discussed my 5 and 10 year career/life plan with him. (romantic eh?) Then sorta offhand he asked me if I wanted kids. I thought a moment and said, sure... I'd like one or two... down the road. Over the next few months something kept gnawing at me and finally I broke down and told him my heart's desire. I went into great detail - children, a home, traditions, gardening, entertaining ... the whole nine yards and really it might sound silly to all of you but where I am from this was akin to saying I wanted to move to Antarctica and herd penguins. Just really out there. I was SO afraid to tell anyone what I truly wanted in life because the correct answer was supposed to be: college - career - one or two children somewhere down the road.
Much to my surprise he was thrilled and a bit relieved! See, he is first generation white collar and he grew up in a working class neighborhood with tons of happy memories and a stay at home mom. His deepest desire was a family too! My life changed that day, for the better. Please don't think that I am knocking parenting with a career. I respect it and thought that would be my life too, I know I would have been just as happy. I did in fact finish law school because James and I thought it was best to complete my education. I firmly believe that everyone has their own way of making a family work and that is exactly the right way. This has just been my way and boy has it been blissful. In the beginning my family thought I had lost my mind or perhaps James had brainwashed me into being "barefoot and pregnant". (I kid you not, my aunt accused him of this. ) I was wasting my education, my potential, my "good years". How could I rely on a man for everything? Pffffth. They've come to terms with it now or at least they keep their opinions to themselves.
I want to thank any of you who just got through that little mini biography. It really felt good to put that all out there. Now to why I am here. There are quite a few SAHMs in my little slice of suburbia and I do treasure their companionship. However I still feel like the odd one out at times. I am the only one in my circle who does not employ a nanny or two. I have also come to discover from scouring this forum the past few weeks that I could be classified as somewhat "crunchy" (how that makes me giggle) while they certainly are not. Luckily now I have a great group of women around me however - and really this is so petty and makes no sense - I lost quite a few friends early on over things like them noticing my sons (during diaper changes) were uncircumcised. The horror! Why would I abuse my sons in this horrid way and set them up for a lifetime of ridicule and celibacy? What? My children don't have 15 after school activities scheduled a day? Your four year old sleeps where? You sometimes just want them to be bored and have to rely on their imagination to fill the afternoon... quick call CPS! I just have to snicker... Don't get me started on cloth diapers and extended nursing! I make light of it now, but it is sad that some people can be so against accepting what is different. So... needless to say I need to chat with some like minds, find my tribe as you all say around here.
I love being partners with James, raising our children, keeping our home. Gardening, cooking, cleaning (yup love it), organizing, knitting and waking up and doing it all over again day in and day out. This is the life!
I am happy to be here and cannot wait to get to know you all.