Talk with me...how do some women stay so thin? - Page 6

[Ruthiegirl]

Originally Posted by Lucy Alden 

Very timely.  This weekend I saw an aquaintance of mine.  She recently lost 60 pounds.  When I asked her how she lost the weight she said she joined a gym and exercised vigorously and regularly for 3 months and lost....4 pounds.  Then she read the above article.  She quit the gym, got a calorie counting app for her iphone and lost 60 pounds in under a year.  She said the main thing wasn't changing what she ate (she was already eating pretty healthy) but changing how much she ate.  Interesting.

Wow, that is really interesting.  I have been coming to the same conclusion for a while now.  I can exercise a lot, but never, ever lose weight from working out.   Diet is everything for me.  Every bite matters.  But I do love exercise all the same -- I feel better emotionally when I am getting to the gym regularly.  It also keeps me busy and out of the kitchen in the evenings.  I tend to go at night when dh has the kids and it is a huge mental boost for me to walk away from mom duties and be with other adults, other adults who are not eating or drinking.  

But really, diet is what matters for me.  

[sapphire_chan]

What you eat determines what you'll weigh, what you do determines how you'll look at that weight.

Is something I've read.

[calynde]

I live in Europe, too, OP...and people here are NOT shy about exposing their flesh. Believe me. I have seen all types of "real" bodies...from babies up to senior citizens. Everone wears a bikini in the summer, no matter what age or type...even the men...speedo country! Lol i would say people here have a much healthier attitude to real bodies and nudity etc...at least healthier than anything i experienced growing up in CA.

At any public swimming area, one will see all kinds of variety. Bird legs, wide hips, flat chests, big knockers, cottage cheese thighs, hairy backs, tree trunk legs, stretch marks, sagging things, chubby bellies, varicose veins, hairy moles, defined muscles, atrophied muscles, wrinkly skin, short and stocky, tall and boney, media perfect...you name it. These are to me "REAL bodies"...in bikinis. Haha what you are unlikely to see here is morbid obesity. It is here, but it is still the exception (for now...probably not for long). And i don't mean only at swimming areas. There is a big difference between aspiring to media propagated beauty and just plain wanting to look and feel healthy. Morbid obesity isn't healthy by any scientific or dietary perspective. And although one might be genetically predisposed to something, one can override that to a large extent through lifestyle and good choices.

OP, it sounds like you are doing exactly the right thing! Fantastic. The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.

[JayGee]

I've read that how your body looks is 10% genetics, 10% exercise and 80% diet.  Most Americans just eat too much, and too much of the wrong things.

[CI Mama]

Originally Posted by calynde 

These are to me "REAL bodies"...in bikinis. Haha what you are unlikely to see here is morbid obesity. It is here, but it is still the exception (for now...probably not for long). And i don't mean only at swimming areas. There is a big difference between aspiring to media propagated beauty and just plain wanting to look and feel healthy. Morbid obesity isn't healthy by any scientific or dietary perspective. And although one might be genetically predisposed to something, one can override that to a large extent through lifestyle and good choices.
 

Yes, this. Such a great point to keep in mind. I wish America could be more like Europe in this regard!

Originally Posted by Ruthiegirl 

Wow, that is really interesting.  I have been coming to the same conclusion for a while now.  I can exercise a lot, but never, ever lose weight from working out.   Diet is everything for me.  Every bite matters.  But I do love exercise all the same -- I feel better emotionally when I am getting to the gym regularly.  It also keeps me busy and out of the kitchen in the evenings.  I tend to go at night when dh has the kids and it is a huge mental boost for me to walk away from mom duties and be with other adults, other adults who are not eating or drinking.  

But really, diet is what matters for me.  

I think it's good to love exercise! After a close reading of the article, here's what I got from it:

• Exercise has a lot of benefits, but weight loss may not always be one of them.
• A pattern of sedentary lifestyle punctuated by short, intense bursts of exercise is counter-productive.
• Regular, less intense exercise (more like the kind of thing we humans throughout our evolutionary history) is more beneficial because it's less likely to trigger the urge for a high calorie "reward" snack.

So many of us spend way too much time in our cars, in front of computer screens, and on our couches. Exercise used to happen naturally in the flow of life. Work, leisure, and just plain getting from here to there required us to move our bodies. Now we can go for long periods of time without moving much at all.

I have found in my own life that the more car-dependent I am, the heavier I am. When I started commuting via bus, I lost weight. Ditto when I started commuting by bicycle. For me, daily exercise throughout the day makes a big, big difference.

On the other hand, when I was in my 20s, I commuted everywhere by bike, worked as a dance teacher/choreographer/performer, and was exercising a lot. And I couldn't lose weight. I was a vegetarian at the time and I ate a lot, especially sweets, I think because I wasn't getting enough protein. So, my experience does tend to support the argument that exercise alone isn't a magic bullet.

[imogenlily]

When I'm not pregnant, I maintain a healthy weight that some people would call thin (size 4ish, ~120 lbs at 5'4). When I exercised vigorously 6x a week (mostly cardio), I weighed `~100 lbs. DH eats the same *kinds* of foods that I do (albeit in drastically different portions), and would probably be called obese. He also works a more physical job than I do.

The differences?

- I grew up in a household where everyone cared about nutrition. There was always a newspaper article about some aspect of nutrition taped to the fridge. I don't agree with everything I was taught by those articles, but it does mean that I think about everything I put into my body and how it's going to impact the workings of my body.

- At dinner time I fill half my plate with veggies. I don't go back for seconds of carbs or meat, if we're eating meat. We set our plates up differently from the outset.

- I don't eat after dinner. If I feel low blood sugary before bed, I might consider a glass of milk or a piece of fruit or some leftover salad. DH eats granola bars, leftover carbs or meat from dinner, a second plate of dinner, or ice cream.

- I don't skip meals. DH often misses breakfast and lunch, comes home and eats four sandwiches with meat and mayo and cheese, then has dinner with me, then gets hungry and eats another meal sized portion before bed.

- I don't see bread or crackers or bagels or muffins as a snack, and I don't eat bread without lean protein and veggies. I might have toast and egg and fruit or veg for breakfast, but I would not have bread and butter as a snack. Muffins are nice, but if I'm going to eat a whole bunch of white flour and sugar, I'd really rather just have a cookie or a doughnut.

- I don't drink anything but water, and very occasionally milk. When I drink a glass of milk, it's less than 250 mL/1 cup. DH drinks juice by the litre. I see this as a symptom of the larger problem about not thinking about everything that goes into his body.

- I am usually enrolled in some kind of fitness related class. This has been aquafit, ballet, yoga, hiking, running. It's always once a week, and so I get 1 hour of vigorous exercise (ok, excluding yoga) once a week. It encourages me to be more active in the rest of my time. DH drinks beer and plays video games in his off time, punctuated by a hike every couple of weeks.

- I let myself eat the "bad" foods I love, in moderation. Chocolate cake, gelato in the summer, yam fries and aioli, brie and baguette, tempura avocado. If there's a food I like, but isn't a favourite, and I know will do nothing good for my health, I skip it (ie. vanilla ice cream, non-yam-fries, cream sauces, potato chips - delicious, but not worth it to me).

- If we're going to eat out, I prefer Indian or Ethiopian restaurants where I order non-cream-based vegetarian curries, or pho or sushi places. DH prefers pizza, pasta, and burgers. When we do end up going to those pizza,  pasta, and burger places, I hardly ever order pizza, pasta, or a burger.

I don't think this is obsessive, and I do it largely to prevent disease in later life and to feel good now. I am very worried about DH, but it's his body and his choice.

[kristandthekids]

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Edited by kristandthekids - 1/16/13 at 7:07pm

[journeymom]

This is a really helpful thread.   Lots to think about. 

Maybe we could say Eat food, not too much, mostly plants, and keep moving.

[Chamomile Girl]

Originally Posted by journeymom 

This is a really helpful thread.   Lots to think about. 

Maybe we could say Eat food, not too much, mostly plants, and keep moving.

Sort of like a mash-up between Michael Pollan and Richard Simmons?

[journeymom]

Originally Posted by Chamomile Girl 

Sort of like a mash-up between Michael Pollan and Richard Simmons?

 

[les_oiseau]

I only read the first page of posts but one thing I noticed was a lot of mamas saying they are thinner when they are happier and heavier when they are angry, down, depressed.... I kind of see the same perspective on the flip. Recently I noticed that my husband and I are lazy, more irritable and down on life when we are eating too much. It's like the food weighs us down and the need for so much digestion put a strain on our bodies along with throwing the chemicals off in our bodies. What I have been doing lately is when I feel this way I will fast. Sometimes for a day, sometimes a meal or two, or one meal 2 or 3x a week. It feels sort of like I am regaining control over my body. I have to be really careful because Iam one of those people who get really crabby when they need to eat or sleep! But it doesn't take long before I have more energy, motivation, am thinner and just feel better in general. I will say though that if I don't take vitamins I start to feel like crap. Also have been realizing I felt a lot better while fasting when I was drinking a nutricious tea, like honey bush or rooibos.

[soldierzgirl]

i agree with @chicasmama. I was 180 pounds when my soldier left for basic training. He left for Korea shortly after that and by the time the first year in Korea was over, I had lost 48 pounds by doing ALL THE THINGS you have listed. I gave up soda/sweetend drinks, creamer, sweets, and any and all junk food, except for holidays. I never cooked fried anything and if we got fast food, i always ordered a kids meal.  It was easy then since I didn't have a husband at home and the kids were small. One box of mac n cheese and we had leftovers.  I also worked M-F and walked my kids home from school everyday 2miles) I was aware of my body - no slouching! LOL you'd be surprised how much energy can be used simply by standing/sitting up straight. I have now been through a combat deployment and gained it all back plus some. I am working to implement all the things I did before, into my new life/routine. 

I am back in the same area i was in when i was so much slimmer and some people have asked why i gained so much weight? well, its my own fault. My neighbor and i loved TV and junk. when the kids were off to school, it was DVR and biscuits and gravy. Then off to taco bell or Mcdonalds for lunch. then we'd have a snack with the kids. Then it was dinnertime. Then after the kids were in bed it was more DVR and baked goods or candy. TOTALLY killed my figure and I have had to trim my wardrobe down to only a few outfits. I'll be Damned if I can't get my slimmer self back, now that my soldier is home.  I want to have fun with my kids at the beach and don't want to feel self concious about my body. I was a 36-24-36 in 2009. I plan to be a 36-24-36 by Mother's Day next year. i have a great figure! its just hidden under all the garbage i ate! :-D 

[lilgreen]

I am thin and have always been thin. My mom has always struggled with being overweight. My dh is overweight/obese. I became vegan for ethical/ecological reasons in 1997 and subsequently became anemic. That woke me up to the importance of nutrition. I have since been diagnosed with celiac disease, so I have to be even more careful about what I eat in order for my body to get what it needs. Food for me is truly about nutrition. My dh loves to cook and he says that I take the joy out of food. It's true, food is not usually an enjoyment for me - it's a function.

So, diet restrictions are what makes me thin without working at it. But, apparently, I'm missing out on a lot of joy :)

[MrsKoehn]

Resurrecting an old thread? I have been on both sides of it. I am 5' tall and have ranged in my adult life from 82 lbs to 143. That means I've been a 0-14 in size. For me, when I got to be too much of a book worm and stayed inside a lot as an older teen, I packed on the pounds and wasn't eating well. I went to college and eating was worse plus I was running myself ragged with all I was trying to juggle. Then something happened that STRESSED me out for a long period of time. I ended up with Crohn's because of it. Then the weight fell off. I couldn't keep it on and just got sicker and sicker and sicker. I switched to all organics and supplemented like crazy. It would work for a while, but then something would stress me out again and I would go all over again. Losing more weight every time. ARG! I found it was as hard to gain as to lose. I never believed it when I heard super thin friends say that. But thinking back, they ate like horses, just metabolized.

My sister is naturally thin. So is one of my brothers. They can eat as little or (usually) as much as they want and never gain a pound. That used to bother me.

From being so thin and consequently malnourished, I was unable to even attempt to conceive until this past summer. This spring we finally got it to take. I'm 17 weeks, due in Nov. I have lost 9 lbs since conception and I cannot get it back on. It's frustrating. I know of a lady whose children I grew up with who was thin, but ended up 72 lbs at the BIRTH of her perfect size, healthy son. WOW.

But ya. Healthy eating and moderate exercise I think will help gain or lose. It's just tough work either way. Now to convince hubby to lay off the sugar and carbs.....  :)

[miami99]

Everyone I know is so tremendously thin.  

That is only normal that some people are bigger, while others are smaller, so no worries there!

Their Facebook pages are plastered with the most amazing pictures of themselves in teeny tiny bikinis.  They look fabulous!  They seem happy...

I got the feeling that you believe that your happiness depends on how thin or fat you are. Which is totally wrong. It does not really matter. You can be the fattest person in the world, but happy.

I see lots of nice marriages, good parents, friendly, happy kids.  And flat bellies and beautiful legs.

I know lots of large people who are happily married.

How do other women control their appetite?  

Often, it is not about controlling your appetite. Their bodies simply work in different ways. One person may eat one loaf of bread and gain half a pound, while another will not gain any weight.

I can read the diet plans, but really...who can follow them?!?  3 oz of salmon, 1/2 C of brown rice and a nice salad.  You have got to be kidding me!  I can eat that and then sit down to a meal.  My appetite is huge!  

Keep in mind that not everyone is telling you all the truth. There are some people out there who may claim that it is all about their diet, but they don't tell you that in addition to their diet, they are using weight loss pillls. So, I would take what they say with a grain of salt.

I am not jealous.  I am not angry at myself.  I do not have a negative self image.  I am strong and happy.  I run and exercise and eat decently.  I just want to know how so many women are able to stay so very, very slim. 

Don't be angry at your self. There are more important things to worry about.

And yes, I know what a lot of you might say -- that I don't know what women are going through to keep weight off -- they may be bingeing and purging, they may be battling eating disorders.  I just don't see it.   I see healthy women, living active lives who all seems to be sporting size 2 jeans.  I have seen eating disorders before and I don't see the signs in any of my friends.  

Help me out here.  My big pants are starting to taunt me.

Don't stress yourself too much about your shape. It is all gonna be alright, believe me.

[miami99]

Everyone I know is so tremendously thin.  

That is only normal that some people are bigger, while others are smaller, so no worries there!

Their Facebook pages are plastered with the most amazing pictures of themselves in teeny tiny bikinis.  They look fabulous!  They seem happy...

I got the feeling that you believe that your happiness depends on how thin or fat you are. Which is totally wrong. It does not really matter. You can be the fattest person in the world, but happy.

I see lots of nice marriages, good parents, friendly, happy kids.  And flat bellies and beautiful legs.

I know lots of large people who are happily married.

How do other women control their appetite?  

Often, it is not about controlling your appetite. Their bodies simply work in different ways. One person may eat one loaf of bread and gain half a pound, while another will not gain any weight.

I can read the diet plans, but really...who can follow them?!?  3 oz of salmon, 1/2 C of brown rice and a nice salad.  You have got to be kidding me!  I can eat that and then sit down to a meal.  My appetite is huge!  

Keep in mind that not everyone is telling you all the truth. There are some people out there who may claim that it is all about their diet, but they don't tell you that in addition to their diet, they are using weight loss pillls. So, I would take what they say with a grain of salt.

I am not jealous.  I am not angry at myself.  I do not have a negative self image.  I am strong and happy.  I run and exercise and eat decently.  I just want to know how so many women are able to stay so very, very slim. 

Don't be angry at your self. There are more important things to worry about.

And yes, I know what a lot of you might say -- that I don't know what women are going through to keep weight off -- they may be bingeing and purging, they may be battling eating disorders.  I just don't see it.   I see healthy women, living active lives who all seems to be sporting size 2 jeans.  I have seen eating disorders before and I don't see the signs in any of my friends.  

Help me out here.  My big pants are starting to taunt me.

Don't stress yourself too much about your shape. It is all gonna be alright, believe me.

[BeFitMom]

Look into Volumetics. It's a way of eating lots of healthy food, but not lots of calories.

BeFit-Mom