We moved about 10 months ago- across the country into a house that ....well anyone seen "the money pit"? I am a work at home, stay at home, always there, single, doing my best, momma. My dd seems deeply unhappy- I thought is was a phase, or once things settled down she would perk up... I am not putting a time limit on transitions, but I am hoping for some advice to help us heal.
Here is the situation, dd wakes up screaming. EVERY time- even naps. even if I am still in bed- but obviously more intensely if I am up and working. I tell her before we go to sleep that I might need to do some work and always race to her as soon as she wakes.
She hates it when I sing- or act happy (this has been going on for many months, I have entertained the notion of her being highly sensitive and bothered by noise)... I ask her how she expresses her happiness and she says she doesn't have any, she is just sad all the time. YIKES. kids are mercurial, but this is a theme.
often when we have our little talks before bed, she says" tomorrow is going to be a sad day"... and during the day she tells me many many times every day she is sad, sleepy- or "I need to go home" (even if we are home, which I point out).
She doesn't engage in activities with other kids, we have tried classes, playdates etc- she just wants me to hold her all the time...which I do.
She frequently feigns helplessness, I need to carry her everywhere, wipe her nose, change her socks spoon feed her etc, brush her teeth. She will often stand in front of a door and scream for me to come and open it, even if it was just 3/4 closed- I took many of the doors off - because they would swing shut and I would be running all over the house opening them.
She was an EC grad around 2 yo (right before our move) and now she has frequent accidents and pees the bed every night (which has been gradually gaining momentum since we got here) I expected some setbacks of course, but it seems to be getting worse and worse.
I feel like she has just shut down and tuned out.
There have been a few moments when she lights up and engages in something and they are so wonderful! but bittersweet, I am so worried about her and I know she feels my tension and stress... she is never more than 6 inches away from me and I can't hide that part of my life.
I do mostly ok with this until I see other 3yos running and jumping, playing, hand holding and engaging eachother. I don't want my daughter to miss her happy carefree childhood.
Advice? good books? thanks :)