Reactions when you found out

[brennan]

I just found out I am pregnant (yay!)...which is VERY exciting but....my reaction is less then what I expected.  We've been ttc for almost a year, I just made my appt to see my dr for a referal to a fertility dr.....and lo and behold I'm pg.  I anticipated tears jumping for joy etc after having trying for so long, and yet my reaction was "huh that's interesting". 

Anyone else have this happen?  Really we are ready for another, money's not a problem and we've been waiting for so long.  I don't feel pg in any way which is probably not helping

[Buddhamom]

Hmm, after being told 8 yrs. ago we couldn't get preg. after failed infertility treatments, then adopting almost 6 years ago and being done, being 40 and so sure my mood swings and lack of period was due to early signs of menopause, I dropped to the floor and has mixed bouts of crying and laughing. I called my second daughter up at college hysterical and when she finally understood what I was saying she started laughing and was excited.  My oldest said she did a double take on my message because she thought I said my other daughter was preg. *LOL* My poor hubby was so shocked that when I had him paged he said "I am leaving now", hung up and walked out of the middle of a business meeting with no explaination to them.  Everyone around us was speechless out of shock when we told them and you would have thought we had nine heads the way they looked at us.  So yeah, I can understand a weird, not bad though, reaction to it.  We all laugh now and DH and I are still shocked and laugh when we think of the chances and I am already almost 23 weeks along.  When it sinks in you will be ecstatic, trust me. I think you get so use to the disappointment when infertility is involved and come to term with disappointment that you really don't expect it to have a positive outcome anymore and when it happens you almost feel like it is a cruel joke. ENJOY and CONGRATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[PAgreenmama]

i think because so many things can go wrong in early pregnancy i've always taken first trimester day by day.  and i've never had an early miscarriage or anything... maybe it was just an embryology class that made me realize how amazing it is that most of the time everything turns out right!  it's also hard to really believe that you're pregnant when you don't look or feel anything yet:)

in any case, i've felt the same as you each time i've had a positive test no matter how long or short of a time we'd been trying.  i'm sure that in the next few weeks, reality will sink in and you'll start feeling excited about you're new little one!  congrats!

[AnnieA]

I think it's normal. This baby that I'm carrying right now was VERY much prayed for and wanted but when I got the positive test, I wasn't overjoyed. I was happy but not like crying tears of joy. Then I expected that the first time I saw the baby on the ultrasound or heard the heartbeat, I would cry tears of joy. Nope. It was just like you described, more of a "huh. that's interesting" reaction.

But let me tell you, at my 12 week ultrasound for the NT scan, when this sweet little thing showed up on the screen and she was kicking her legs and moving her arms, I LOST it. It still makes me tear up thinking about how much love flowed right in to me as soon as I saw her.

Just wait. That feeling will come and when it does, it's amazing. Congrats on your pregnancy!

[physmom]

I think that's really true.  I had a tumor before DD was conceived and was told that it could eventually spread and that my chances of conceiving were about 35% lower than a  normal woman.  Anyways, we were very anxious about getting pregnant but it turns out I got pregnant after only 2 months of trying.  I was excited but that excitement didn't compare to the first time we say her heartbeat on an ultrasound (DH and I were both crying because we were so scared the test was wrong and it was really a cyst or something).

This time around it was a surprise pregnancy. Basically, I said a few bad words out of shock (not because I was upset) and then when and showed DH. He was excited but we were more shell shocked than over the moon. However, I did have an early ultrasound this time too since I knew I wouldn't be getting any medical care for awhile after that (between a move and change in insurance etc) and seeing that little ball in there was very exciting but I think once I get out of the first trimester I'll really be celebrating more since it still hasn't sunk in 100%!

Originally Posted by AnnieA 

I think it's normal. This baby that I'm carrying right now was VERY much prayed for and wanted but when I got the positive test, I wasn't overjoyed. I was happy but not like crying tears of joy. Then I expected that the first time I saw the baby on the ultrasound or heard the heartbeat, I would cry tears of joy. Nope. It was just like you described, more of a "huh. that's interesting" reaction.

But let me tell you, at my 12 week ultrasound for the NT scan, when this sweet little thing showed up on the screen and she was kicking her legs and moving her arms, I LOST it. It still makes me tear up thinking about how much love flowed right in to me as soon as I saw her.

Just wait. That feeling will come and when it does, it's amazing. Congrats on your pregnancy!

[brennan]

I'm glad I'm not the only one!  It kind of shocked me that I would have that reaction to something that is so SO very wanted.  I'm trying not to get too excited as I have miscarried before, but I still didn't expect my reaction to be so.....stoic

[debfab]

I just found out (via home preg test) that we are pregnant!  We've been trying for about 5 months, and I've been taking prenatal vitamins and cutting back on alcohol and caffeine, but now that I got a Positive, I'm FREAKED OUT!  I am overwhelmed with thoughts about what pregnancy will be like, what our life will be like once the baby arrives, and I'm scared about so many things.  Is this normal? I hope so :). And, I hope these feelings of anxiety go away soon and that I can get excited about this wonderful occasion in our lives!

I'm also nervous about the birth, the first few weeks with a newborn, and what my life will be like as a mom. Have any of you had this experience of intense fear when you first received the news?

I would really appreciate to hear what your experience was, and how you managed to settle into the idea :).

THANK YOU!
deb

[sunanthem]

When I first saw the test last tuesday, my words were, "Oh, shiiiii........." I mean, I knew IF we had another I'd want it in the next 4 years, but I was also completly happy being a mom of 2 big kids now... and I am about to finish my A.A. degree this summer and was planning to continue at a University in the fall, but that will now have to wait, so that is some of my disappointment. Plus, the third is just, not really as exciting as the first two.. I already have a boy and a girl. I am slowly getting excited about our little tie breaker, and my dh is pretty stunned and knows what we're in for, so he's kinda apathetic right now... more work, more crying.. all that work again. It will all work out though, and at least our kids and friends are excited for us. I haven't told his family yet, I know that's not gonna be so fun.

[tracymom1]

Originally Posted by sunanthem 

Plus, the third is just, not really as exciting as the first two.. I already have a boy and a girl. I am slowly getting excited about our little tie breaker, and my dh is pretty stunned and knows what we're in for, so he's kinda apathetic right now... more work, more crying.. all that work again.

This is almost exactly how I felt - almost like a "been there, done that" kind of feeling. Now that I am 20 weeks, it is starting to get pretty exciting. This one is much more of a slow build than an immediate frenzy!

Congrats!!

[SGVaughn]

Originally Posted by debfab 

I just found out (via home preg test) that we are pregnant!  We've been trying for about 5 months, and I've been taking prenatal vitamins and cutting back on alcohol and caffeine, but now that I got a Positive, I'm FREAKED OUT!  I am overwhelmed with thoughts about what pregnancy will be like, what our life will be like once the baby arrives, and I'm scared about so many things.  Is this normal? I hope so :). And, I hope these feelings of anxiety go away soon and that I can get excited about this wonderful occasion in our lives!

I'm also nervous about the birth, the first few weeks with a newborn, and what my life will be like as a mom. Have any of you had this experience of intense fear when you first received the news?

I would really appreciate to hear what your experience was, and how you managed to settle into the idea :).

THANK YOU!
deb

totally normal.....I had a similar reaction when I was pregnant with my youngest ..so much so I almost didn't have her because I was so intensely affraid all of a sudden (and I had tewo children already!)

needless to say...I did have her obviously and she has been a complete and total joy to our family!

how to settle it in your head..well only you know that and you'll figure it out. I focused on great things about babies (smell, sounds they make, their warm cuddly bodies) and mine and partners good qualities and hoped thats how shes turn out AND I had the threat of miscarriage after I had decided "well i got myself into this I need to see it through" and that really really made me want to hold onto the new baby tight.

this time around I got pregnant with a copper iud, taken a morning after pill for the one instance of unprotected sex (within 12 hrs!!) and my husband had a uhh..injury that should have discouraged things and I wasn't upset but my reaction was definitely..."huh, imagine that".