Charlize I'm so sorry. Do you think he might be having an affair? I just went through this in Sept. (found out my husband had an affair), then I got pregnant! I too had visions of being a single mama to 4. We are in reconciliation and it is hard. Sometimes I still think I may end up alone. I think he loved her....feel like he stays with me out of pity... I have given him permission to leave me, but he hasn't.
I know you are very scared right now, but the best thing you can do is stay strong for the kids and baby, and if your husband comes back, just try to show strength...and show him all the ways you have prepared to go on without him. I recently read that no one can really love each other unconditionally, it is a choice. You can choose to still love him and maybe it will click in his head that his unhappiness is really selfishness. If you show him you are not selfish and can still give love even after his abandonment, there is a big chance he will feel the regret he should.
As for your kids, praise your husband in front of them and especially in front of him...that will show him you still care without actually begging for him to return.
I didn't beg my husband to stay, but I have been nagging alot about the affair and if he was happy and I want to talk a lot about our relationship and it always seems to put us a step back. When I don't mention how hurt I am and act happy, he seems more apologetic and loving.
These are just all things I am going through now, and it is so very hard even more when you are pregnant full of emotions..