Catching a lot of flac for nursing 19mo - Page 2

[beebalmmama]

This is pretty common throughout the WIC program. Annoying yes. My WIC counselor gave me a funny look when I told her no he hasn't had cow milk he's still breastfeeding. What just because his birthday was a week away?

Originally Posted by 1love4ever 

Lol I was going to say about WIC, here in Montana WIC takes away all of a mom's benefits that she was getting for BFing when the child turns 1 year old, whether or not you are still BFing.  They then give the 1 year old benefits, which includes whole cows milk.  So, as a BFing mom of a 1 year old on WIC, I am now drinking whole cows milk  :/

They neither encourage me or discourage me from BFing past 1 year, but just how they handle their benefits discourages it, as well as the fact that they offer lots of advice on weaning starting at like 6 months!    It is very frustrating.  Anyone know how to go about getting this changed?  I have written to our governor about WIC not allowing any organic food(besides milk) to be purchased, but at the time I did not know about the 1 year old thing.  I dont know what he thought of my letter either, because I accidentally checked the box that said I did not require a response:(

Thanks!

I am more of the type to keep breastfeeding in public just to make a point. Although I do remember avoiding it once while waiting for a table at a restaurant in the crowded lobby when I felt like a guy was leering at ds(who was also 2.5 yrs at the time) and I. The only time I ever bf'd in the bathroom and I still remember ds asking why we were nursing in the bathroom.

As for your dh, I'm sorry he's not being more supportive. Have you tried talking to him about his discomfort with it? My dh was super supportive until ds turned 2. He wasn't giving me a hard time but kept asking when I was going to wean him. I told him that I wasn't and no offense to him as the father but our nursing relationship really was between ds and I and neither of us were ready for it to stop. He came around a bit more when I talked to him about all the benefits of nursing a toddler/preschooler.

[BananaBreadGirl]

I am nursing my 19 month old and thankfully most of the confusion/opposition has been not from family.

I do keep a copy of of a Kellymom Extended Breastfeeding Fact Sheet (http://www.kellymom.com/store/freehandouts/extended_bf_factsheet.pdf) in my diaper bag at all times since I encountered a confused/misleading doctor at my son's 1 year well child visit. Thankfully I haven't had to use it, but I feel better knowing that I would have all those facts about fewer illnesses, higher IQ, etc. handy.

[ewe+lamb]

Originally Posted by ctrygirlatheart 

Thanks for all the support.  My husband is embarrased because nursing an older child, especially in public, is so far outside the norm.  Where as I feel like I am doing a public service by nursing in public, he feels mortified.  In private he waffles, one moment it is "wean her, she doesn't need it" other times it is "give her the boob".  He is not at all interested in me right now, so he certainly doesn't want them back!  I wish we were on the same page, he was the one that kept me nursing through all of the problems we had when we started out and now it hurts that I don't have his support, especially when everyone else seems to be harassing me.  

Thanks for all of the comebacks, serious and funny.  I couldn't help but laugh at the mental picture of serving my husband a nice candelit dinner in the bathroom.  Hey Valentines Day is right around the corner right?

This post stood out to me, your husband was the one who helped you through difficult times in the beginning - can you maybe say to him how much you appreciated that and you'd love to get that support back again, quoting the WHO, AAP and UNICEF may help as well, just another thought that you are not nursing an older child - an older child to me is someone of say between 5 and 8 years old before getting into the tween years, a toddler for me is when our babies start walking and moving around which, for me is around 1 - 2 years old and a child is 3 - 5, does this make sense, seeing your toddler as exactly that can help take the image away of a child, one of the things that I do in my meetings is hold up a measuring tape - in inches normally from 0 - 60 inchs, every inch equates to a year, if we nurse our babies for 2 years and look at that time in comparison to the persons life it's such a short time - why would we want to make it shorter - this sort of image may help your dh and mother understand what you are trying to achieve.

Loved the comment about the bathroom too, I'll keep that one for some of my mothers if it comes up, and about your LLL meetings - you can contact either your local leader or helpline when dealing with this sort of thing, they are there for all sorts of support.

[ctrygirlatheart]

Thanks for all the love, went to LLL yesterday too and feeling better and more informed, although I think I need a cue card with facts and witty comebacks so that I don't just sit there with my mouth open next time another comment comes my way.  DD and I will be out and about all day today library, beach, muesum, and a couple of meals out so it will be a good day to practice.  I am just now remembering that people made some pretty rude comments when I was pregnant too, what is it with people?  I am sure even after weaning my parenting will always be up for public comment.  

DH and I have many issues to work on and started counseling a couple of weeks ago.  The LLL leader gently reminded me that perhaps he just needed some education on why BFing is still important and that I might ask him what about NIP specifically bothers him, if he is worried about someone catching a glimpse of boob, maybe using a nursing cover would placate him.  So I will bring this up at our session this week as that seems to be the only place we can talk about things without yelling or him being too tired.  Who knows maybe the therapist will get an education too!  

[goldenwillow]

I am grateful you received the support you wanted.  LLL to the rescue!

I once read a post here on MDC from a mama whom was being attacked about her decisions.  Instead of getting back in their face, she just didn't say anything and just kinda raised her eyebrows in disbelief.  It leaves the person attacking (from lack of knowledge) feeling like an ass and hopefully they will think about it before they open their mouths the next time.  I actually have tried this and it really worked on a day that I just didn't give a shit. 

I think people say stupid things because they are scared of what they do not understand.  There are times when I am not interested in educating others, which is not often... mainly when super tired... especially the ones that are just plain rude.  I will however get on my soap box when asked respectfully.  I decided awhile back that I cannot convey all our beliefs to people that really don't care.....  sad really.  I decided to chose my battles, KWIM?