Support and Advice Needed

[naschaka]

My daughter is 13 weeks old today.  It has been a bumpy road for her with her stomach.  In the early weeks she had a lot of gas and pain associated with the gas - we started using Gripe Water and that helped a lot and then BioGaia, which made a world of difference. Things were looking up, and I thought it was just normal colic-y baby pain, etc.  Then around 7 weeks things started taking a turn for the worse. 

At around 7 weeks there was one week where she started having silent reflux, which deteriorated in 2 days to spitting up constantly to the point that the stomach acid clearly caused her tons of agony - essentially vomiting all day any time she ate then crying and being in pain the rest of the time.  But her poop was normal and she kept gaining weight well.  By process of elimination I realized that the only different thing I had eaten was a larger than normal amount of butter (I have a cow's milk protein allergy that allows me small amounts of butter/milk in things like cookies - cooked past a certain temperature).  I took all cow's milk, as well as sheep and goat milks (which I am not allergic to)  out of my diet and it got better.  Then after 2 weeks I tried to have some goat yogurt and we had a relapse of the same symptoms, so I came to the conclusion that it must be a dairy allergy.  At this time I also stopped drinking soy milk and started drinking hemp milk. 

We had a couple of good days with no symptoms, and then it just started all over again last week.  Nothing changed in my diet that I can identify (I've been keeping a food journal), and I cook all my own food with 99% fresh ingredients, so I feel like I'm dealing with a moving target - once I eliminate something it works for a few days and then something else hit.  I feel like starting from scratch would be the only way I could really identify what this moving target is, but physically, emotionally, and mentally, I can't do the complete elimination diet.

Add to this the fact that my daughter and I have had a somewhat difficult breastfeeding relationship (bad latch that won't get better for more than a couple days before it deteriorates again), and I'm considering stopping breastfeeding.  I know that it is the best thing for her in some ways, but how do we balance the benefits of breastfeeding with causing our babies pain?  Where is the balance?  I feel like at least with one of the extensively hydrolyzed or amino acid formulas I wouldn't have to be terrified that every meal could cause her agony. 

I'm not looking for answers of "you must go to formula" or "breastfeeding is always best no matter what" - but I would love to hear from moms that have had similar problems and how they have dealt with it without judgment. 

Thanks everyone!

[PatioGardener]

Have you tried treating the reflux? My DS has severe reflux, and would refuse to nurse (as well as have episodes where he couldn't breathe). Prevacid did wonders for him. I would NEVER have imagined that I would have an infant on medication, but I am so thankful that he is. It was really the best thing for him. And we are still breastfeeding 9 months later (I eliminated dairy and soy for 6 months - he tolerates it if I eat them now.)

[naschaka]

My daughter has never refused to nurse and in fact prefers to stay on as long as possible when she is having an episode, and it's clear that the reflux is only intermittent - it goes away for several days then comes back and rapidly escalates into the vomiting and pain, which is why I'm sure it's an allergy and not just reflux.  I really want to keep breastfeeding my daughter but I'm just at my emotional end of knowing that I'm the one that is causing her pain.  I am just trying to figure out what to do at this point.