Returning to work - baby won't take a bottle, screams when I'm not around

[jblv]

I'm returning to work (full time *cry*), and DD who is almost 3 months refuses the bottle.  We've tried for weeks to give her a bottle, several different kinds of bottles and nipples (Born Free, Adiri, Playtex Dropins, Como, you-name-it-we've-tried it) etc.  My husband and nanny are at home with baby and our DS who is 2.  

I'm about to have a coronary because baby will not eat and will cry the entire time I am away.  What to do?  I'm afraid I'm ruining her for life!

[JudiAU]

A lot of babies don't like bottles, especially when the better alternative is in the other room or will be home soon. Your baby may just need to make a transition when you are working.  Sorry I don't have better advice. =(

[JollyGG]

I agree with a previous poster that you won't know how it really goes until you are actually back at work. Mine would never take a bottle if I was in the house, they often would wait quite a while fussing hoping I would be back soon. But, not to sound heartless, they always ate eventually if they got hungry enough.

Are you able to go home or have someone bring baby to you for a lunch time feeding.

My youngest really preferred me to a bottle and would really only take a couple of ounces at the sitter, just enough to get her through until I came home and then nursed like crazy all evening and night. It got to a point when she was 9 months old that I just quite pumping as it didn't make sense for me to pump 12 ounces every day while she ate 2.

Don't loose hope just yet. Little people are very resilient and something will likely work out.

[jblv]

I went back to work (part time for two weeks) yesterday afternoon.  Baby cried the entire afternoon, so my nanny brought her to my office.  The minute I held he she stopped crying...  I didn't even need to nurse her.  After a few minutes, she nursed.  I cried.

When I go back to work for full days, I will pump in the morning, go home at lunch to nurse her, and then the nanny or my husband will bring her to me in the afternoons to nurse.  

I just hope she bonds with my nanny and my husband and starts to take a bottle.  I'm having trouble eating and sleeping because I worry about going back to work and what effect this will have on her.

[Emmeline II]

I went back to work when ds was 12weeks for a month and a half. Ds would not take a bottle with me in the house, but once I was at work ds did nothing but eat, to the point that dh had to bring ds to work so that I could nurse him.

[AugustLia23]

Mamma, the stress you are having over this will only make things more difficult. I understand it's hard to leave you baby and go back to work - I've done it twice myself -  but it sounds like it is the reality. If you trust that your nanny can take good care of her, then try to stop worrying about it. Sometimes there is an adjustment period, and a positive outlook can make all the difference in the world. 

I don't think any infant has died of starvation from their parent going back to work when they were being care for appropriately. Give it some time, it will all work out.

[Alyantavid]

I haven't read the other replies so hopefully I'm not repeating anything.

First, relax.  Going back to work is stressful and hard.  But your baby's gonna pick up on your stress too.  I think most bf babies would rather have mom than a bottle.  But if mom's not there, that bottle might not look too bad.  My youngest wouldn't take a bottle if I was even in the house.  Without me around, he'd take a bottle, though it never was his favorite thing.

My first day back to work after I had him (he was 6 weeks old), was rough.  But we both got used to it and it ended up being ok.  He did reverse cycle, which worked out fine for me since I couldn't pump much anyways.  And he got to where he'd take a bottle or two a day.  He did eventually start sleeping all night and drinking all his bottles during the day as he got older.

If you can go nurse on your lunch break, that will probably help ease you both into this.  Good luck, you can do this and you'll both be fine!

[2xy]

See, we had the opposite problem, short-lived though it was. DS1 wouldn't take a bottle from anyone except me. That only lasted a couple of days and then he was fine....but I realized at that point that all the introducing of the bottle had been done by me. Nobody else had ever fed him. He adapted quickly, though.

Good luck to you!