Entertaining a 16 month old & a 2.5 year old while on a long flight? Also tips for getting...

[Climbing Rose]

We are going to be flying for almost a whole day, and have to change planes once.

I also just found out last night that they may not seat our large family all together on the plane! 

DH and I are flying with DC that are 11, 9, 6, 4, and then our two little toddlers, and they seemed to have seated us in groups of two. 

That is SO weird to me.  I don't really want my DC sitting right next to total strangers when I can't see them.

But practicially speaking, the biggest issue seems to be our high-needs 16 month old.  She is the only one too young for me to reason with a little bit, the only one too young to care very much that I have new toys and that she can see clouds, etc.  And since I got preg, she is also no longer nursing.  She does have her own seat on the plane, FWIW.

So !  

I am thinking of just giving her to DH, and going and being seat buddies with my 2.5 year old, who I can at least reason with (or bribe!). 

Also, with all the new security, anything I should know? 

Thank you so much!

[FiveLittleMonkeys]

When we've flown as a family, we are also broken up.  I give the kids buddies, and pair up my oldest with #4 (last flight, age 15 1/2 and 9) and paired my two middle daughters together.  My husband and I dealt with the baby, who really needed to be passed back and forth for awhile.  

You can alert the gate agents that your seat assignments are broken up and you're traveling with small children, and ask the flight attendants to help you in at least getting your family seated near each other.  The best configuration we've had is on a plane that is two seats on each side and three seats in the middle - we took up two whole middle rows and one seat in a third.  It worked well.

As for security, I just flew with my little one in November, and was asked in three different airports to take him out of my wrap.  If you were planning on wearing your 16 mo, I would be prepared to have to take them out.  I didn't take a stroller with me and I gate checked his carseat on one flight - the other flights had seat availability for him (which of course, he didn't sit in....but oh well!).  As for security, I was never once asked to do an enhanced pat down or go through the special screener - just the regular metal detector.  

Good luck!!

[Maluhia]

With the toddlers (2.5 and 16 month) I'd ask to have your family groups in front of one another so when those little ones are kicking seats it is not strangers - that always mortified me when DD kicked the seats in front of her. 

[velochic]

Believe me... when they realize that you have family seated all over the plane, they will do their best to get people to change seats and get you together.  Nobody (and that includes me, who is a mother) would want to sit next to, say a 4 yo and 2.5 year old with their parents being far away.  The flight attendants will help you rearrange.  What the airline is going for is that you will panic and pay the "selected seat" fee (at about $30 per seat) to guarantee your seats together.  But once you're on the plane, people will be clamoring to changes seats so that your family can sit together.  They do not want to be left alone with your young children sitting next to them without a parent.

Other than that, my only advice is just good luck.  I have an only and can't even fathom the issues you might encounter with a large family, so any suggestion I would have would be absolutely zero help.

[Super~Single~Mama]

Yeah, come up with who can/should sit together, who MUST be next to you of dh, and go to the gate agents with your ticket assignments and tell them you need to make changes.  They really will do their best.  Like, the 11 and 9 yo's can probably handle being together but far from you and your dh (not ideal, but manageable unless they fight constantly - then use bribes if necessary), the 6yo can probably sit the one of you that has the youngest, and the 4yo and 2yo with the other parent.  Maybe?  If you are on a huge plane they will try to seat you all together, or maybe your 11,9 and 6yo's can sit together (with some good bribes for the older 2 for helping out), and then you have the 16mo and your dh keeps the 2yo and 4yo (or vice versa)

Come up with some ideas of how to do it ahead of time, b/c they may not be able to put all of you in the same row or right near each other, so if you have some other ideas to start with you won't be coming up with it on the spot, and b/c you'll be prepared it won't be as frustrating to handle at the gate. 

My one other advice is to get there E-A-R-L-Y - with tons of time.  If passengers haven't all checked in, it might be easier for them to move you around. 

[Katwoman]

Originally Posted by velochic 

Believe me... when they realize that you have family seated all over the plane, they will do their best to get people to change seats and get you together. 

I wouldn't count on that actually.  We showed up for a flight with our family of four - that had seat assignments together - to discover the kids were sitting in middle seats not near us or each other.  (My DH and I weren't together either.)  We had to wait until the entire plane was full and then talk to the people sitting next to our kids.  The ground crew said there was nothing they could do.

Now fortunately, nobody I've experienced, wants to sit next to an unaccompanied 1 yo.  But airline crew aren't always in a position to care about the needs of the few when their responsible for the needs of the many.

As for entertaining your 16 month old.  We found these cool sheets of "paper" at a toy store.  They have the picture "in them" and when you apply the water from the special water pen the picture "appears".  The great them about them was, after they dried the picture disappeared and you could color them all over again.  (They're also thin and easy to transport and you can refill the water pen.)  How about a roll - or three - of tape?  She can pull it out, stick it to her fingers, etc.  Snacks?  Does she like to eat?  Finger foods.  Does she like books?  She can walk back and forth between you and your DH in the aisle when they aren't serving.  (I don't mean alone of course, I just meant as an activity.)  Trips to the bathroom are always fun.

Also, I don't know where you are in the potty training spectrum, but I always carry a diaper for the kids in my carry on.  We've gotten stuck on the tarmac before and little kids can't hold it like adults.  We've only had one emergency.  But I can slip the diaper underneath their bottoms and there is no mess or frightened child.

For security, keep your family together.  Make sure the kids understand they have to take their shoes off, put everything in a plastic bucket so there isn't as many questions when it's your turn.  When you pack put all your liquids into a plastic bag that can easily be pulled out and put in the plastic bucket.  I always take a print out from the TSA website about food allergies.  (I have to pack special milk for the girls.)  When you get to the buckets have everyone put their shoes in the bucket while you put the carry on's in.  Put your purse and valuables in the last bucket.  Send a parent through first, then all the kids, then the last parent.  (Think bookends.  My kids get excited and wander in all the people.)  After everyone is through, keep the kids off to the side and putting shoes on while you and/or your DH gets the stuff on the conveyor belt.  And most off all, no matter WHAT!, ignore people's comments/snotty looks/glaring.  You have a right to be there.  Letting them get to you will cause you stress which will then stress out your kids.  You will have a long day a head of you, breath, remember you have a right to be there and that you don't know these people.  IGNORE THEM.

Have a good trip.

[Owen'nZoe]

Now fortunately, nobody I've experienced, wants to sit next to an unaccompanied 1 yo.  But airline crew aren't always in a position to care about the needs of the few when their responsible for the needs of the many.

Ha! We were the lucky ones who were all seated separately and were reassured by the airline that no one would want to sit next to our unaccompanied 18 month old and would be happy to switch with us when we got on the plane. Wrong. The flight attendants were completely uninterested in helping me rearrange seats (they said it was up to me to ask people to change), and the people on either side of my son would not switch with me or my husband because neither of us had a window or aisle seat. They insisted they were fine with sitting next to my son for 7 hours. Someone finally gave in when I started crying and the flight attendant finally agreed to step in.

Anyway, I actually think sitting in pairs might work well. Maybe you could pair each of the middle kids with an older kid, and you and your husband could each take a little one? I'm guessing these are international flights - do you know whether the plane will have in-seat entertainment systems? I'm really normally very against too much screen time for the kids, but on an international flight, those rules go out the window. My 3 year old was very, very happy to watch movies and play video games during our last 10+ hour flight. When we did a similar trip when my older son was 18 months, none of the toys or other distractions kept him happy for long - he just wanted to walk the aisles of the plane over and over and over. In retrospect, I wish I would have packed a little lighter for him, since I ended up carrying and stowing a lot of things he just wasn't interested in.

Carrying snacks and empty water bottles (that you can fill on the other side of the security checkpoint) is very helpful. Lastly, I don't know where you are on potty training, but I would consider pull-ups for the 2.5 and 4 year old, if they'll wear them. I am sure this depends on the airport and where you are flying, but twice on our last trip we ended up having to wait for a flight in areas without a bathroom after having gone through a lengthy security checkpoint. Luckily, we had no bathroom emergencies during that time, but had the boys needed a restroom while we waited, it is unlikely we would have made the flight. Also, the bathrooms on the plane were disgusting by the end of the flight, and my kids didn't want to go in, much less use it. Blech!

[lexapurple]

I do not know if I was lucky or what but when I bought tickets online for my DD and I, only option was to buy tickets separated by two rows. I had two transatlantic flights and two internal ones. As soon as I bought my tickets and received itinerary, I called the customer service and told them that my 3 yo. was seated in separate row. She changed my seats right away for the ones that were not even on "avalable" chart, for us to be next to each other. When we had our first internal flight, I came to the gate agent as soon as he appeared at the gate and asked him to change if it was possible to change our seats from bulkhead to regular ones, he did it right away as well. The plane was full and somebody has seat in our seats. I would recommend that you look at your itinerary and see which seat was assigned to whom in you family and ask them if those kids who are far from you can be moved closer. It doesn't guarantee that they will change anything but it is worth a try. If it doesn't work ask again at check in and gate agent.

[velochic]

I have to admit, we rarely fly any American carriers (that is US-based airlines, not the airline that is named "American).  We almost always are flying European carriers and we never had a problem getting rearranged.  Guess I was wrong.  In that case, OP, I would be paying the premium prices to get seats all together.