Can't seem to stop these annoying behaviours

[rolenta]

My kids are generally pretty good, but my 4-year-old Isaac has picked up some of the most annoying behaviours and I CAN'T GET HIM TO STOP.  One of his favourites is to pick a closet and pull everything off the hangers and put them on the floor, then pulling everything off the top shelf and pulling that off, too.  Another is getting into the fridge and making some kind of mess.  Either he'll pour bowl after bowl of cereal until all the milk/cereal is gone, smear yogurt all over the place, rub ketchup into the living room carpet, whatever.  He'll also find a box, any box in the house, and just dump the contents out.  He breaks computers faster than I can turn one on.  He also likes to go into my room while the baby's napping and start jumping in her crib or turn it over or just start screaming at her.

Okay, so it sounds like I don't watch him, but seriously, he can do any of these things in ten seconds flat.  I turn my back, and there's a huge mess.  I try to keep him occupied.  I provide him with things to do, we go outside lots, we go out and do lots of things.  There was a week where I tried to just keep him so occupied he had no time to do any of this bad stuff.  We spent five hours in the day just playing outside, going from playground to playground and keeping busy, and he got home and within minutes, he was into something. 

I put up gates and put locks on things so he can't reach them and he by-passes everything.  He needs an electric fence or something, he just won't leave anything alone.  Nothing in the house is safe!

Anyone else have a kid like this?  What did you do? 

[DaisyMay]

How about if every time he makes a big mess he has to either help clean it up or sit and watch you clean it up with the intention of this being a rather boring passtime for him.  You could talk as you are cleaning it up about how you've had to stop doing what you were doing to deal with the mess and this is a waste of time, also perhaps how you may not now have time to get around to some fun stuff you were planning on doing with him later.  That way he may get to understand the consequences of his actions not just being irritating to you but also impacting on him.

Also, what is your reaction when he does these things?  Maybe he is partly doing it to get a reaction/see what the reaction would be and as such, treating it as an annoyance and pointing out to him the time you will have to spend sorting it out, but not reacting too strongly will take some of the fun out of it for him.  I've found a lot of my son's irritating behaviours (he is also 4) come and go if I don't make too much of a big deal about it.  I tell him I don't like it and pre-warn him not to do it and then tell him I'm pleased when he doesn't do it (the one that springs to mind was when he used to wake up and sneak downstairs, pull chairs up to cupboards and help himself to food) and then when the novelty wears off he usually drops it. 

Also, how about if you try to channel his more destructive/mess-creating impulses through planned but purposeful messy activities.  Fill boxes with stuff that he can tip out without it being a problem, then he can fill them up again and tip them to his heart's content.  Stick him in the bath with a can of whipped cream or shaving foam and let him go crazy.  Cook him up some spaghetti and give him a bowl of jello and some cornflakes and get him to mix up a crazy concoction. 

Good luck - I do feel for you.  4 year olds, eh!