Newborn refusing to nurse...how long before getting back on is a big problem?

[SomedayMom]

I have a 5 day old.  He had a great latch in the hospital, but when my milk came in he had a hard time getting enough milk.  I was very engorged and that just made it harder for him to latch.  He hadn't pooped in 24 hours and his urine output was borderline.  Today he utterly refused to latch on the last 2 times I tried.  Screamed his little head off.  Finally I gave in and gave him a pumped bottle.  I had supplemented a few times to get him to poop, but never a full bottle.  So he's had 2 episodes like this and 2 bottles.  I sent DH out for something else to feed him with but he couldn't find anything and I have an LC appt tommorrow.  I am pumping OK, but I'm stressed.  I EP'd for my first due to major latch issues that never resolved.  I'm terrified.  I have 2 older kids now and I don't think I could keep that up.  My second nursed well for 2 years. 

I suspect he is tongue tied and that was making it harder for him to get enough milk and the engorgement just made it worse.  I'm scared that I won't be able to get him back on the breast.  How long can he go like this before it becomes a major challenge to get him back on?  I'm hoping if it is a tongue tie I can get it taken care of or that the LC can really help me tommorrow. 

I'm just in tears over this.  I want this to go well.  I NEED it to go well.  I have 2 other kids to take care of and sitting in bed nursing/pumping long term isn't going to work well in my situation.  My heart is breaking :(

[journeymom]

Many, many hugs for you, Mama. I can't give you advice, just encouragement. Hang in there, the appointment is coming soon.

Are you still engorged?

By the way I had nearly the experience with my first. We got to day 4 before dd and I made a break-through. There were getting to be a lot of tears on both our parts by then. But we made it. Later we discovered that her tongue is pretty short. Not quite tongue tied, but it was definitely a major factor.

[Vaske]

With my first, we had all sorts of breastfeeding obstacles to start with, little help to resolve them, and plus we ended up having to supplement because of severe jaundice.  By the time we got home on day six or so, my daughter had developed a strong case of nipple preference for the bottle.  I would offer the breast, and she wouldn't even try to nurse, only scream for a bottle.  I had instructions to try to nurse, and then to feed pumped milk and formula by bottle.  I was exhausted and very anemic and this sort of triple-feeding was just too much. 

Finally, I got some good advice from a top-notch LC, to quit pumping, ditch the bottles, and just go to bed topless with the baby and nurse until it worked.  The first day was -very- difficult, my daughter didn't want to work to learn to breastfeed properly, she wanted the instant gratification of the bottle.  But babies aren't stupid, and she soon figured out that nursing was the only way she was going to eat.  So she did, quickly got the hang of it, and never looked back.  I think that that advice really saved our breastfeeding relationship, because it was in nothing but a nosedive by that point.

However, quitting bottles cold turkey is a pretty radical move, most lactation consultants and even La Leche don't recommend it.  We only tried it as a last resort, because we knew our baby was healthy and entirely capable of breastfeeding, if only she would try it.

Hopefully your LC can be of some help, and can help you get any tongue tie issues resolved quickly.  If I were you, I would at least switch from bottles to something that feeds much more slowly, like a syringe or a Lactaid/SNS supplementer.  Bottles just make it too easy for the baby.

[ewe+lamb]

Hi - hang in there, huge hugs to you, it will work out for you, these are things that we can find solutions for, if you are still having latching problems because of engorgement you can try reverse pressure softening -

http://www.nbci.ca/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=31:rps-by-mother-with-guidance&catid=6:video-clips&Itemid=13

this is the Dr Jack Newman video and very good - you could also look at the finger feeding video as well - good idea from the pp - although it's really short - the video that is, but perfectly understandable - and if you are sore yourself this may be a good solution until you find out what the problem is - it may even be that it is just the engorgement that is causing the problem and no tongue tie - however if you think that tt may be an issue here are a few things for you - good ness I hope I haven't overdone things for you!!  This position may help as well for you so that bb can get a deep latch - www.biologicalnurturing.com

You mentioned that your first bb never fed well and still has issues - can you clarify?  If would be interesting to see what sort of issues he had to see if it has any relevance to the situation you find yourself in at the moment.  Anyway, tongue ties - hmm my favourite - I'm just joking, so if you can't see the tongue tie with the eye as such - type 1 or 2 which is at the tip of the tongue or just a few millimetres back from it, a 3 or 4 is slightly more difficult, a type 3 is noticable when the tongue is sticking out and has a little cup like appearance in the middle and the 4 is really when the palate is very high at the back of the mouth - swallowing can be hard and not very efficient, if the tie needs to be clipped then for the most part they are non vascular and therefore hardly bleed or not particularly painful, try to get baby onto the breast immediately after the clip, although it may take a little time for the tongue to get used to it's new found freedom - sometimes it can be immediate and for others take a bit of time. 

Hope that you manage to get things sorted out and that the LC visit is successful for you all!

Best of luck and finally of course congratulations on your new little baby!!

[3girls1boy]

My friend who was a LLL leader at the time and had nursed 3 children before was not able to get her 4th child to nurse for almost a month.  What she felt really turned it around was cranial sacral adjustment for the baby.