When does Separation Anxiety get less extreme? & how can i fix the daddy/daughter bond?

[KellyandBean]

My DD is 12 months next weekend. I am a SAHM and i am pretty much ALWAYS with her. She doesn't seem to have to much separation anxiety when i leave her somewhere outside of our home (for example at grammas house) because everything around her is so distracting and new. But when we are at home she doesn't even like it when i go into a different room. For example our kitchen is really small so we decided to just gate it up instead of baby proofing it and every time i am in the kitchen she stands at the gate and fusses at me. As a result i never get anything done in the kitchen (cooking, dishes etc) Also if i get up even to go to the bathroom on the other end of the apartment i have to bring her with me or she has a meltdown. She just learned to walk about a month ago so i am hoping that means that she will get less extreme soon? I'm hoping it will be soon that i can expect she will be comfortable with the idea of knowing that i am in the apartment even if she can't see me? Does anyone with older babies recall roughly what month that happened so i have something to look forward to?

another thing...

Also lately i have been thinking i really want to get her more used to her father. I.E. mommy takes off and leaves them for a few hours at a time.) Especially now that she is old enough to go a while without breast milk (wont take bottle or milk in a sippy). She only sees him on weekends and maybe 3 hours at the end of the work day and 2 in the morning. Some how we started off really strong with the work being split 50/50 but now it seems like i'm the only one that does things for her. I bath her, change her, feed her, clip her nails, comb her hair etc. Also my husband never leaves the house with her without me coming too. This weekend i was thinking i need to rent a rug cleaner and do the floors and i was thinking about asking him to take her out for a while just the two of them but i know he is going to be clueless as to what to do with her. What is your child's favorite things to do with their dad? How can i encorage her to spend less time clinging onto my pant legs and more time having fun with her dad? Or is that just something that will come when she is emotionally there?

[pbjmama]

re:daddy stuff I think some of it will come naturally but it wouldn't hurt to encourage it! my kids love to go to the mall play area with my dh. it isn't anything great but they love it! they also like to go to the local outdoor store and see the fish (a pet store would work), out for a special snack with daddy (usually ice cream), to the park, etc. My dh likes to have his own diaper bag for these outings, when my kids were younger i would make sure it was filled with a change of clothes, diapers, wipes, and snacks. Yes, my dh could do this but sometimes he would forget or not realize what all they would need. i also would give a reminder such as, i changed her diaper at 4 and she usually has a snack at 5. oh, another thing we did was a daddy stroller ride around the block 2x in the evening so mom could get a shower by herself.

most of all, i think asking him to help and trusting that he will be able to do it are the most important. sometimes my kids come home a mess or crying. daddy didn't do anything wrong but no one can do it like mom!