First meeting w/ lawyer tomorrow - what to ask?

[fiona2359]

I have my first meeting tomorrow afternoon w/ a lawyer to learn more about the divorce process and find out about my options. I really have no idea what to ask her specifically. I know things I want to learn about in general (e.g. how does this all work). But what qwuestions should I ask her - about her work, her approach, etc. to make sure she is a good fit?

What do you wish you'd asked? What was the most useful thing you learned?

Thanks!

[Halfasianmomma]

Ask her what experience she has in cases such as yours.

Ask her if she is generally available through email to answer any questions or address any concerns you may have...ask about her turn around time to answer such quieries.

Ask her to tell you various scenarios about what could happen in your case (i.e. scenario a), your former spouse doesn't argue anything, which means the timeline will be x, or scenarion b), you end up solving everything in mediation, so the timeline will be ....).

Ask her what documentation you will need to provide her to get the ball rolling.

Ask about division of property, financial assets, custody, child support, visitation schedule...

[BabyBearsMummy]

I would also ask what the normal court default rulings are in your area for about division of property, financial assets, custody, child support, visitation schedule

 . . . . .     It can be very helpful to know what the court normally rules to prepare mentally even though this might now be what ends up being ruled in your case.

[fiona2359]

Thank you ladies. My  meeting is in about an hour and I am feeling *very* anxious. I've made notes on all that you advised above and it really helped me clarify what I need to ask going into this meeting.

[StephandOwen]

I hate to be the one to say it..... but ask about her fees too. The little fees ($40 to respond to your email!) can suck you dry very quickly. Make sure you know the costs going into it so that there isn't a shocker when the bills start rolling in.

Other than that, the other ladies had great advice. Good luck!

[Super~Single~Mama]

I know its too late, but READ the retainer agreement - she will tell you to, and she will give you a copy, but really read it.  It should lay out ALL the fee's, and is important.  Also, trust yourself.  If she's easy to talk to, thats really important.  If you hate her, she's not a good fit. 

I know this post is too late, but I hope it went well!!

[ZoeyZoo]

I would also ask in what time increments they bill and whether anything is not billed. For example my lawyer doesn't bill e-mail unless she has to write something up specifically for you or look up something. That is not the case with most. Some will not charge for calls less than 5 minutes. Things like that. Some bill in 6 minute increments other in 15.

[secondimpression]

I did consults with 4 different lawyers before signing a retainer. There were also a number of unreturned inquiries and brief 10-minute phone consults that went nowhere. I never expected finding the right attorney to be so much work but it has been so worth it.

#1 was horrible, I actually sat in my car for an hour after the consult just bawling my eyes out. He had this sign reading "We fight for father's rights!" on the front door to his office which was a bad omen right from the start. Through the entire consult, I got the impression he was more interested in representing my X than me and actually went so far as to tell me I was lucky I wasn't currently incarcerated for child abduction and spousal abuse! The kicker was when he handed me his retainer agreement and 3 pages of paper requesting just about every date/time X and I ever had sex! It's just bad news when you're interviewing a lawyer and they're bold enough to say they don't believe you were faithful to your spouse. He was also the cheapest of the 4 ($100/hour, $1000 retainer) if that says anything about him.

#2 I did 2 consults with. The first was free and while she didn't give me much hope on my case, she did assure me she would fairly represent me (whatever that's supposed to mean). I did a second hour-long consult with her that cost me $250 (I wasn't sure I wanted to retain her) and we went through the nitty-gritty of X's and my financial situations and she recommended I file pro-se. Or you know, I could retain her for $4000 at $250/hour. I walked away with a vibe that she didn't really want me as a client because my case was simple and wouldn't earn her much money, she said the average divorce in her practice cost $20,000.

#3 was a phone consult with a pair of ladies. I got a vibe from them that they weren't very experienced within the first few minutes so didn't get too into details. They just weren't a good match for me.

#4 is who I wound up hiring. By this time, I'd learned a few things about screening attorneys (Google, Google, Google) and searched his case history. My state has a public judiciary search website and I was able to pull him up on there and learn about his typical cases and what judgements his clients wound up with (I very highly recommend checking if your state has one). He was the most experienced of the 4 and the most expensive (but only by a little). He's also extremely dry and to-the-point but "got it" on my financial woes; he doesn't waste my retainer on small talk and issues we established don't matter to me. I needed someone who could do some legal hand holding and who could also be aggressive when it came to dealing with X (which actually wound up being needed). I don't have money to spend, so it was very important to me that my lawyer be able to tell me when something isn't worth fighting over and tell me to shut up when I start babbling and wasting more $$$ minutes of his time. If you can't tell already (lol) he's definitely not one of the cheaper family law attorneys in my area but he is one of the most experienced, meaning I don't have to pay for him to reasearch my case, even the more complex parts.

Everyone else already gave great advice and I assume you've already had your consult. The only advice I have is to research this attorney's actual cases and absolutely do another consult with someone else. Also, write down a prioritized list of what you want and keep it fresh in your mind every time you talk to your lawyer, it keeps you from fighting over the inevitable stupid stuff that will come up if you've already decided it doesn't matter.

[fiona2359]

SecondImpression - thank you so much for the detailed response.

The meeting went well and I got a lot of useful information, asked most of the questions mentioned above, and really like the firm. I will check on their records as PP mentioned. I also am going to talk to a friend and find out what firm she used and the cost. This firm charges $465 an hour for the principal lawyer and I think the paralegals or juniors get $200 a hour. They appear to have a very good track record at reaching favorable settlements and avoiding litigation. The retainer is $7500, which I have, but is a scary amount of money. I feel like they would be able to be assertive/agressive in protecting my interests while being reasonable in terms of working towards a settlement. They were up front that litigation is extremely expensive and they work very hard to avoid it. They charge in 6 minute intervals and it is no joke - so emails and such can add up. I so appreciate all your advice about being susinct and organized, because I can see that a failure to do so would significantly increase the cost.

I am getting my financial ducks in a row. I opened a checking account at another bank in preparation of moving money to it. I am applying for a credit card in my name only.

[NolaRiordan]

Originally Posted by fiona2359 

 This firm charges $465 an hour for the principal lawyer and I think the paralegals or juniors get $200 a hour. They appear to have a very good track record at reaching favorable settlements and avoiding litigation. The retainer is $7500, which I have, but is a scary amount of money. I feel like they would be able to be assertive/agressive in protecting my interests while being reasonable in terms of working towards a settlement. They were up front that litigation is extremely expensive and they work very hard to avoid it. They charge in 6 minute intervals and it is no joke - so emails and such can add up.

Yikes! Is that typical for your area?? Sure seems like a lot to me. My lawyer charges $165 an hour. Bills in 1/2 hour increments. Doesn't charge for e-mails or phone calls unless they get more involved and require follow up. Based on others I've talked to he's not the cheapest lawyer in town, or the most expensive. I thought he was very mindful of not wasting my money.

[Super~Single~Mama]

Originally Posted by NolaRiordan 

Yikes! Is that typical for your area?? Sure seems like a lot to me. My lawyer charges $165 an hour. Bills in 1/2 hour increments. Doesn't charge for e-mails or phone calls unless they get more involved and require follow up. Based on others I've talked to he's not the cheapest lawyer in town, or the most expensive. I thought he was very mindful of not wasting my money.

Large firms generally charge lots more - particularly for senior associates and partners (since they have crazy amounts of experience).  OP, if you're interested in finding a cheaper alternative, look around at the smaller firms in your area.  You can also call your states bar association, and they should be able to help you find someone a bit less expensive.

[fiona2359]

I am really not sure of what is typical in my area in terms of cost. I am in the DC area, so the COL is high here and there are tons and tons of very large firms. I did get a list of "top lawyers" in the area and went through the websites of the ones close to me and plan to email about 8 of them for additional information. I am overwhelmed by the thought of 8 long phone calls to each one, so I figured I could ask some basic questions up front via email and get the responses and go from there. I asked one friend who is divorced and she 1) paid about $200 per hour 2) had trouble getting her lawyer's attention and 3) signed forms w/o realizing what she agreed to because she was not properly advised by her lawyer. So, that is ONE I won't be calling. I am just in a tough spot because at this point I can't ask around much because I don't what Mr. ICK to know what I am doing.

If the phone book didn't have 1000 lawyers listed in the family law area this would be so much easier.

[secondimpression]

Originally Posted by fiona2359 

I am really not sure of what is typical in my area in terms of cost. I am in the DC area, so the COL is high here and there are tons and tons of very large firms. I did get a list of "top lawyers" in the area and went through the websites of the ones close to me and plan to email about 8 of them for additional information. I am overwhelmed by the thought of 8 long phone calls to each one, so I figured I could ask some basic questions up front via email and get the responses and go from there. I asked one friend who is divorced and she 1) paid about $200 per hour 2) had trouble getting her lawyer's attention and 3) signed forms w/o realizing what she agreed to because she was not properly advised by her lawyer. So, that is ONE I won't be calling. I am just in a tough spot because at this point I can't ask around much because I don't what Mr. ICK to know what I am doing.

If the phone book didn't have 1000 lawyers listed in the family law area this would be so much easier.

I'm in the Baltimore area so I definitely hear you on the high COL. It blew my mind when lawyers started quoting their retainers/hourly rates, and my case is fairly simple! I don't want to say too much about my lawyer on the main forum (XH is a little too internet savvy) but I can PM you if you like for details like cost/name/how he practices. I'm with PPs though that the amount you were quoted is extremely hefty. Also in general, there are a lot of experienced "good" lawyers who choose to practice solo and are significantly less expensive than senior members of a group practice.

[fiona2359]

I sent out email inquiries last week and got replies from about 1/2 of the lawyers I contacted. It seems the going rate is 450-500 for the principal lawyer and 200-330 for the assistant lawyer. They farm out as much work as possible to the more junior folks. Knowing that it is the going rate helps me feel slightly less panicky. I haven't been able to find much in terms of solo pracitce, but the folks I have spoken with are in smaller practices (e.g. 2-8 lawyers). I did not contact any of the really large firms in the area. I scheduled a meeting with one of the lawyers I contacted. I know I'd be comfortable with the first one I met with, but I feel like I should talk to at least one other lawyer to get a fresh take on the situation and figure out where to go. Retainer rates are 5000 - 20000, depending on how likely litigation is to occur (I am hoping to avoid it, of course).

[Super~Single~Mama]

Originally Posted by fiona2359 

I sent out email inquiries last week and got replies from about 1/2 of the lawyers I contacted. It seems the going rate is 450-500 for the principal lawyer and 200-330 for the assistant lawyer. They farm out as much work as possible to the more junior folks. Knowing that it is the going rate helps me feel slightly less panicky. I haven't been able to find much in terms of solo pracitce, but the folks I have spoken with are in smaller practices (e.g. 2-8 lawyers). I did not contact any of the really large firms in the area. I scheduled a meeting with one of the lawyers I contacted. I know I'd be comfortable with the first one I met with, but I feel like I should talk to at least one other lawyer to get a fresh take on the situation and figure out where to go. Retainer rates are 5000 - 20000, depending on how likely litigation is to occur (I am hoping to avoid it, of course).

Ok, the larger number is HUGE!  You should ask about paying in smaller chunks.  Although, remember that the retainer money is used up as they go, and you'll get back anything not used - but be sure to ask about that.  If its a retainer to secure availability I don't think the money needs to be paid back (ETA - any contract you sign should expressly state what happens to your retainer in case it isn't all used), but if its any other sort of retainer you get back whatever isn't used. 

You could also ask if you can just use an associate instead of the principle (so long as the associates are licensed to practice law - if they aren't actually admitted to the bar you don't want them).
 

Good luck!!  I think you're doing well, finding a lawyer can be intimidating, and interviewing more than one is great!!