Does you kids play you against your EX and how do you deal with it? It seems my SKID is telling her mom things about her dad (example: Dad does not feed me) and tells daddy things about mom when she is with daddy (example:mommy says i can sleep over another night). We are aware when she is telling stories but bio mom does not think her daughter is capable of telling untruths and is causing a lot of arguing.
Does you kids play you against your EX
The quick answer would be "yes". Even though dsd never lied exactly, but she certainly did leave out important details when complaining about one side to the other on occasion.
How to deal with it? With lots of patience and consistency. I'd call them on it, and discuss the meaning of "fair" and "honest". I would also try to do my best not to blow such arguments out of proportion with the ex. I'd offer her the truth, and let her decide what to do with that information. To "why didn't you feed the kids?!", I'd reply with "we all ate pasta and meatballs at 7 o'clock, I'm not sure what they are talking about, but I'd be happy to discuss the food issue with you and the kids present next time we do the pick up".
Very few things about blended families are easy. Hang in there.