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Gary Ezzo? - Page 2

post #21 of 25
I'm sorry for your experience with Ezzo - I have been there to some degree with my oldest two kids as well (Now 19 and 18) This is what I have learned...

Guilt does not help, in fact it will interfere with the relationship and connection you now want with your oldest son. You cannot feel guilty for what you were unaware of!! Guilt will have you resond to him and discipline him out of fear. As parents, we do the best we KNOW how! What we did not know, we could not have done!

When dealing with your son, deal with the little human inside him - hold him a lot, snuggle him and speak gently to him. Ask yourself when you respond to him if you are responding from love or from fear - and then respond the way that would have you responding from love. Make that choice a concious one. If he is not so big that you or DH cannot carry him in a sling, then do this. Over time he will become more secure and less difficult to deal with.

At least he is still young - I had my turn around when my oldest was about 14 and I allowed guilt to rule my decisions about how to respond to them - as a result, they ran WILD!!!!

You are an awesome parent with an open mind and how cool that you have a new outlook! Use it to your sons advantage!
post #22 of 25
Great advice gauge14iv

queen620, remember that fear is not of the Lord. Respond in love and lavish your little ones with love. Set clear but reasonable boundries and you will find less and less times that they will test those boundries. Oh, and give them plenty of oppertunity to run off that energy

In life, we can't go back but we can make a difference in the future!
post #23 of 25
I just wanted to add:

I did Ezzo with my first as well. I didn't know any better. But I didn't experience any major affects of doing it. My 2yo is a normal 2 yo boy. I often think that people need to use there commen sense with any book that they read...ap or not. I haven't read Sears yet but want to. That also said..I do not use Ezzo with dd (#2) now. I have a great bond with both my kids. It will be interesting as they grow to see the difference between the two..I can't tell what they are...the fact that #1 is a boy and #2 is a girl...that in itself as well as the "birth order" will also take some close looking.

Ps. I always want to say that I am not in any way condoning Ezzo...the guy is wierd.
post #24 of 25
I'm sure that your mothering has helped to make up for the early cio methods. Love covers a mulitude of sins. It really does!!!!
post #25 of 25
And children are endless pools of forgiveness

(not that I would know... )
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