I haven't done it both ways yet, but my first two were about 6 years apart. It was nice that my son was in kindergarten already, so when we brought my daughter home from the hospital I had at least 6 hours of 1 on 1 time with her every weekday. She'll be about 20 months old when this baby is born.
Is this your last baby? - Page 3
We are done after this one. It doesn't have anything to do with the rough parts of pregnancy for me, I just don't want more children after this. Actually, had DH not wanted another so badly I am not sure I would be pregnant right now. Don't mistake me, this pregnancy was planned and I am very happy for it, but I just do not have a desire to have more then two children.
I actually wanted DH to get a V while I was pregnant but he feels more comfortable waiting until after the baby is born.
It's been tough! A lot tougher than I imagined. I'm not so secretly glad DD is 2.5 so that she's sorta kinda sometimes able to help me out. I mean, I know many of you guys and others have kids a year apart or so, and I know it's possible. But I also really think that when it comes to child spacing you have to look at yourself and what you can handle, and evaluate based on that. I know myself, and I know I'd be certifiable with two under two or something like that!!
I can seriously see both sides, which makes it tough for me! I think it'd be nice to have a few years break from babies, and then jump back into it with more wisdom and renewed energy.
But I can also see DH and I looking at each other when our kids are middle school age, and then looking at brochures for travel and saying,"....Nahhhhh!" LOL!!
More and more as this pregnancy continues, I think I'm done. It's a strange, comforting, satisfying feeling. But, I guess it's open to change!
I've done the break (semi) and then also jumped back in quickly. It is a toss up to what I prefer. I really, really enjoyed DD1 being almost 4 when DD2 was born. DD2 ended up getting seriously ill as a newborn and for 6 months our lives were consumed by basically keeping her alive. DD1 was old enough that I was and did ignore her while dealing with DD2 during that time. If I wanted only two then that would be of been wonderful. I got calculating out the years if I were to have wider spacings and realized that I didn't want to do this forever! I had much mess stress with a baby and an older child, well I would of if DD2 had been well anyway. I don't even want to think about the nightmare it would of been dealing with all the hospital stays if I had a very young child as well.
So DD2 and DS ended up exactly 2y and 6m apart and it was harder. This baby and DS will be 2y 3m apart, and I am dreading it, DS is also delayed so he seems younger then he is. The one nice thing if all my children were younger together is that we would have minimal places to go, I can see the beauty is having a few crazy years with multiple small children and then they are older together. My oldest will be 8.5 when this babe is born, doing the whole school thing with a newborn in tow is rough. I can't ever volunteer, I miss out on so much because I can never attend anything. There is no bus service so twice a day, the school trip is 20 minutes each way, not fun to be doing with a brand new baby. Then with older kids you have all the extra stuff, snowboarding , gymnastics, tapping, on and on. My small kids spent half their life in a waiting room and the other half driving someplace.
Someday I invision being able to help out and actually watch DD1 do white water kayaking for example but that day is many years away, for now I am just wrangling small children and maybe getting to hear about it later.
I needed a nice long break from baby things. When DD was 2, 3, and even 4 I couldn't go near the baby section of a store because it just made me feel overwhelmed and tired thinking about those days! Now that it's so far behind me, I miss it! I can't wait to have baby stuff all over the house again, I've gotten a couple years of sleep, and I'm ready to tackle that challenging first year again with renewed energy.
There's a good chance this will be our last baby. I might get my tubes tied while they're in their getting the baby out. They asked last time, and I definitely knew that I wanted more children then. But, this time I think that four will be it. We already have 3 girls, and if #4 is a girl, I don't see myself wanting to try for a boy.
This is baby #2 for us and this will definitely be our last baby. DH would have been fine only having one, but I come from a large family and I couldn't imagine not growing up without at least 1 sibling, so I was set on having two. We actually talked about this and agreed to it before I would say "yes" when he proposed, because I wanted to make sure we wouldn't have to fight about it later.
They will be exactly 2 years apart, which I think will be nice for them growing up. It would have been nice to have waited a little longer before getting pregnant again (I miss having coffee and alcohol!), but this way we get all the sleep deprived nights and diapering over in one big chunk, rather than spreading it out over so many years.