not sure what to do about this w/out her feeling shamed or punished by me or her school.
the most recent happening is that i believe she is guilty for 'graffiti' on the lost and found table in her school. it says a former friend of hers' name WAS HERE. its in permanent marker. its about as big as my hand, total circumfrance.
i say former friend because my dd apparently is banned by the other girl's (also 8) older sis and brother who also go to the school...they say my dd lies and they don't want their sis near my dd. yikes. they have had mediation w/ a teacher there (its supposed to be a democratic environment) and i thought they'd worked thru stuff but obviously not.
i took a pic of the 'graffiti' w/ my cell phone unbeknowngst to my dd and had her write her upper and lower case letters. i also asked her the next day how she writes this particular girls name. my dd HAD to be the one to write that. the girl wouldn't have wrote that...she'd have framed herself big time. it is most definitely my dd's handwriting. and how do i let her know i'm convinced 99% that SHE did this???
my dd is obviously hurting badly about this friendship gone downhill... it's hurting me too. not sure what my dd needs from me...but i feel she deserves protection and nurturance. do i tell the school my concerns so they can support her better? i am tired of my dd being singled out as trouble maker (they don't use that term but i feel it) or a liar or thief or hostile.
what would you do??? i've talked w/ her already many times about how much it must hurt to not have her best buddy anymore...its so sad. they were so close the whole fall of this past year at school... and what would you do re. the other girl and/or communicating w/ the school? i think i will request a mediation w/ the teachers (who are called facilitators there), the girl and her mom...maybe her bro and sis too, and my mother and i. my mom lives w/ us and she is like the other parent.
i'm so sad. and don't want my dd to be looked at as someone other kids should steer clear of.
do i have her clean the graffiti off? goo gone? in private so nobody at school sees?
sorry for rambling. my heart is hurting...