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Does she "seem" like she has Aspergers? (Video) - Page 3

post #41 of 81

From what i saw in the video i say she does have aspergers. my oldest daughter has it.

post #42 of 81
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by mom2mygirls View Post

From what i saw in the video i say she does have aspergers. my oldest daughter has it.



Interesting.  May I ask what characteristics you see in the video that make you think Aspergers?

post #43 of 81


 

Quote:

Originally Posted by WindyCityMom View Post

My MIL, my husband etc.  For awhile, members of the family would tell me "You made her like this!".

 

...The thing is DD really enjoys the classes she goes to.  She raves about Miss C at gymnastics and about Miss J at playgroup. 

 

....And do I mention these issues to her teachers?  Do I mention the possibility of Asperger's and SPD to her teachers (since one doctor said she had them), or wait until (IF) we get a set diagnosis?  Do you think the teachers know something is up, or should I speak to them about this?

 


I think you may have misunderstood what I meant. I think that classes and outside activities are imperative. I don't think that you made your DD like this (she sounds very much like my DD) but I do think that the more people who work at engaging with her, better. We used to homeschool, and I now believe that isn't what is best for her. It's just too isolating. No one worked at interacting with her but me. It didn't cause the Asperger's but it wasn't helping her either.  An alternative school environment has worked out best for her.  There's a really big difference between letting go of any blame over the fact that a child is on the spectrum, and just being realistic about what will best help them have a full life.

 

A full life doesn't need to include the McDs play place. It does need to include people besides mommy. It needs to include places besides home. Many of the options for homeschooled children simply didn't work for my DD, and a bunch of homeschool moms who are completely overwhelmed with what they are trying to do with their own kids can't compare to qualified teachers who WANT to work with my sweet little girl.

 

I think that social situations are GOOD, but we need to find ones where our kids don't just shut down. We need to be realistic that it is pushes their comfort zone, it isn't just *fun* for them the way it is for some kids. 

 

I think you should talk to the teachers about your concerns and the process you are going through. They most likely have noticed things and it will let you work together as a team. Being a team is good. There's nothing about this that is shameful and needs to be kept a secret.

 

Also, have you read The Out of Sync Child? I suspect that part of the reason she is shutting down is because she is overwhelmed with the sensory input. This was book has tons of great ideas for working on sensory stuff.

post #44 of 81
Your description of the eval is a little weird. My DD is NT and almost 5 and wouldn't have responded well to any of what he did! She's a highly sensitive kid, which in certain situations can seem unusual, but isn't. It's understandable once you realize that some kids are more easily overwhelmed by a lot of stimuli coming at them all at once.

I just wanted to share an anecdote with you. A good friend of mine has 2 kids and we were starting to think there was some sensory or ASD issue going on. They wouldn't interact with other kids, had all these sensory issues with clothes and food, little eye contact. She ended up changing their diets and within weeks of going off of dairy and gluten, those 2 kids were different people. Outgoing, fun, eating better, playing, able to handle chaotic places (like the park or a party)...it was like someone flipped a switch. Diet can have a big effect on us. There are lot of people with varying disorders, like autism and even schizophrenia, who find they are much more able to deal with things when they change what they eat--processed foods, dairy, and wheat are 3 of the main culprits.

Before pursuing a diagnosis at such a young age, I'd really look into making changes like that and looking into the allergy and sensory parts of this. Sort through that, and then step back and see if Aspergers really fits after all.
post #45 of 81
Thread Starter 

Thanks to both! :)

 

Linda on the move: Okay, I get what you're saying now :) The ped recommended The Out of Sync Child (and another one that goes along with it, the name escapes me at the moment) but I haven't gotten it yet- it wasn't at our local library so I need to go to the one downtown.  Fun with two little ones ;)  

 


 

Spring Lily- I agree.  I thought they would focus on more of what DD was doing, try to engage her, etc, but it was really a question/answer session with me.  The man was an older guy, so he might have different tactics?  I did think that the eval stuff was universal.  I could be wrong.  Anyways, the OT is a woman and she sounded pretty nice and peppy on the phone, so I hope she's a bit better than the first person.  I was also told by members on this board that the eval would take around 2hrs but the one with my DD took a fraction of that.  I asked the OT about the length of the second eval and she told me one hour.

 

 

Here's a video of DD at the play place the same day. I think she was feeling quite brave (please also see the other video I posted where she does this odd shielding thing).  In this video she actually gets near other kids, but doesn't go.  Here it is, there are annotations (pop up captions) at certain points in the video that will give you play-by-play.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wVpTXCqHzgE

and a video I found of us at the car wash when she was 2.5. Note the weird thing she does with her tongue.  She has been doing that a lot lately.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rTqAuRJGXdE

post #46 of 81
Quote:
Originally Posted by WindyCityMom View Post

 

 it wasn't at our local library so I need to go to the one downtown.  Fun with two little ones ;)  

 

 

Can you request that they deliver to your local library? We can do this on the internet and they send an email when the book arrives.

post #47 of 81
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Linda on the move View Post



 

Can you request that they deliver to your local library? We can do this on the internet and they send an email when the book arrives.



I don't think the Chicago Public Library does this, but that sounds really cool!  They have it at another library but I'm iffy on the neighborhood so Harold Washington downtown is probably my best bet!  At least it's only one bus and one train, lol.  There are two copies available, the rest are on hold.

 

The other book he recommended was The Out of Sync Child Has Fun, and they only have that one downtown, but they're on hold.

post #48 of 81

I don't know if this is helpful, but the Out of Sync Child is available used on Amazon for 27 cents, plus 2.99 shipping. It might be easier to buy it then try to schlep to the downtown library. smile.gif

post #49 of 81

Some other things to keep in mind...

 

a) It seems she looked away when she had the most to say. It seemed more like a person looking up to the corner of their eye when they are thinking hard... she just turns her head. Speech is still developing at this point and it takes more work to string together longer sentences.

 

b) Some of the items you mention for 3, could also fit a child that is gifted with overexcitabilities. My point is that at the age of three, and especially for a girl, I think it can be very difficult to tell the difference between Asperger, SPD, overexcitabilities, etc.  Honestly, she comes across as a pretty typical, but very verbal 3 year old.

 

c) As a mom, you know best, and you know what may feel off. I think continuing to keep an eye on things, is always a great idea, along with continuing to look at an eval.

 

Tammy

post #50 of 81
Thread Starter 

Thank you IxIa!  

post #51 of 81
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by quaz View Post

Some other things to keep in mind...

 

a) It seems she looked away when she had the most to say. It seemed more like a person looking up to the corner of their eye when they are thinking hard... she just turns her head. Speech is still developing at this point and it takes more work to string together longer sentences.

 

b) Some of the items you mention for 3, could also fit a child that is gifted with overexcitabilities. My point is that at the age of three, and especially for a girl, I think it can be very difficult to tell the difference between Asperger, SPD, overexcitabilities, etc.  Honestly, she comes across as a pretty typical, but very verbal 3 year old.

 

c) As a mom, you know best, and you know what may feel off. I think continuing to keep an eye on things, is always a great idea, along with continuing to look at an eval.

 

Tammy


Thank you! 

post #52 of 81
Quote:

 

Here's a video of DD at the play place the same day. I think she was feeling quite brave (please also see the other video I posted where she does this odd shielding thing).  In this video she actually gets near other kids, but doesn't go.  Here it is, there are annotations (pop up captions) at certain points in the video that will give you play-by-play.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wVpTXCqHzgE

and a video I found of us at the car wash when she was 2.5. Note the weird thing she does with her tongue.  She has been doing that a lot lately.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rTqAuRJGXdE

 

You know her best and if you are hearing a lot of concern from people who know her I'm not suggesting you dismiss it. However, I have to say I'm just totally not seeing from the McDonald's video. Here's some of the many behaviors I'd more associate with sensory overload in a playland: crying, hands over ears, head buried in mom's chest, begging to leave, pulling a parents arm trying to leave the room, trying to leave the room, hitting, screaming, meltdown." What I'm seeing in this video is a smiling kid cautiously exploring her environment, enjoying the feature of trying out lots of chairs, watching big, noisy kids but not wanting to get in the fray. Are you seeing signs of stress or anxiety?

 

Also, I have to say, what could be cuter than a toddler in a cow outfit? Well done!

post #53 of 81



 

Quote:
Originally Posted by WindyCityMom View Post





I don't think the Chicago Public Library does this, but that sounds really cool!  They have it at another library but I'm iffy on the neighborhood so Harold Washington downtown is probably my best bet!  At least it's only one bus and one train, lol.  There are two copies available, the rest are on hold.

 

The other book he recommended was The Out of Sync Child Has Fun, and they only have that one downtown, but they're on hold.



Ok, so I admit, I'm a bit of a library geek so I looked it up for you lol.  According to this link, you can place a hold online and have it sent to your local library.

 

Martha

post #54 of 81
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Roar View Post



 

You know her best and if you are hearing a lot of concern from people who know her I'm not suggesting you dismiss it. However, I have to say I'm just totally not seeing from the McDonald's video. Here's some of the many behaviors I'd more associate with sensory overload in a playland: crying, hands over ears, head buried in mom's chest, begging to leave, pulling a parents arm trying to leave the room, trying to leave the room, hitting, screaming, meltdown." What I'm seeing in this video is a smiling kid cautiously exploring her environment, enjoying the feature of trying out lots of chairs, watching big, noisy kids but not wanting to get in the fray. Are you seeing signs of stress or anxiety?

 

Also, I have to say, what could be cuter than a toddler in a cow outfit? Well done!



Thank you, her nickname is Moo ;) And toddler? Aah!  She is a toddler, isn't she... *faints*

 

I agree with you.  However, I don't think she necessarily experiences sensory overload all the time (at the end she did, which is where she ran away to our table and refused to get back up).  I think it's social anxiety- not because of too much sensory input, but because she just doesn't work well socially.  

post #55 of 81
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by kittynurse View Post



 



Ok, so I admit, I'm a bit of a library geek so I looked it up for you lol.  According to this link, you can place a hold online and have it sent to your local library.

 

Martha


Thank you! I was thinking that hold was just... hold.  Lol! :) 

post #56 of 81

WindyCity - did she seem anxious to you in that video? What does anxiety look like for her? In the video she seemed smiling and engaged in her environment.

 

Another thing I would suggest is being very cautious about how you talk about this stuff in front of her. I'm concerned that it sounds like the earlier evaluation is done with her in the room. While yes she's young, she seems quite bright and I'm sure she can pick up on the idea that people think there is something wrong with her. She probably won't get what it is really about, she can pick up on the idea that she isn't social enough or that people are worried about her.

 

Do you talk about situations before you go and give her specific guidance for her behavior? If not, you may want to give that a try. I would keep it very simple. Set one small goal "When you see your cousin it'll be time to wave hi". Then, after you leave the activity you can debrief and emphasize how she was friendly by waving (or whatever). Bit by bit that will help her get an idea of what she needs to do and may increase her confidence.

post #57 of 81

I have a 9yo daughter with Aspergers, and for us the evolution looked quite different. Your daughter has a much more natural speech pattern, and seems to progress from one subject to another fairly comfortably. Additionally, she seems very engaged, and is making a great deal of apparent eye contact. 

 

 

I would guess there are some sensory issues from what you describe, but they are things you can work through without attaching a label. 

 

She is so young, I think I would be inclined to address individual situations and challenges and worry when she is a little older about whether Aspergers is or isn't an issue.  So much of it is how they relate socially, and that is still developing. 

 

What do you hope to achieve through evaluation and diagnosis at this point in the game? 

post #58 of 81

I haven't been able to watch the videos (something with my computer right now), but the behaviors in group situations that you describe are pretty familiar to me.  My DD is now 5 and getting slightly more comfortable in such situations.  Anyhoo, my DD is introverted.  Groups and noisy places and anywhere that the kids are bigger than her or more busy than she is (um, just about anywhere!) overwhelm her and she appears zoned out or afraid.  She THRIVES in her little ballet class.  She did well in a small swimming class (although I don't know that she ever spoke to any of her teachers, she did learn some stuff and I keep meaning to sign her up again...).

 

Look in your library system for the Hidden Gifts of the Introverted Child.  Read it and see if it doesn't ring true.

 

Tjej

post #59 of 81
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Roar View Post

WindyCity - did she seem anxious to you in that video? What does anxiety look like for her? In the video she seemed smiling and engaged in her environment.

 

Another thing I would suggest is being very cautious about how you talk about this stuff in front of her. I'm concerned that it sounds like the earlier evaluation is done with her in the room. While yes she's young, she seems quite bright and I'm sure she can pick up on the idea that people think there is something wrong with her. She probably won't get what it is really about, she can pick up on the idea that she isn't social enough or that people are worried about her.

 

Do you talk about situations before you go and give her specific guidance for her behavior? If not, you may want to give that a try. I would keep it very simple. Set one small goal "When you see your cousin it'll be time to wave hi". Then, after you leave the activity you can debrief and emphasize how she was friendly by waving (or whatever). Bit by bit that will help her get an idea of what she needs to do and may increase her confidence.

 

She didn't, for the most part.  Like I said, that video showed a good job of her overcoming her anxiety.  She got a little anxious when the girl came too close to her the first time, but did a good job of redirecting herself and finding something else to do (both times the girl approached her).  More often than not this does not happen, and she shuts down.  I have yet to get it on video.  The closest I have of it is the video I posted of her at the car wash where she's 2.5yo.  She does the thing with her tongue, and ignores me, etc.  The picking wasn't as bad back then and she didn't always do it (didn't do it in the video).  That video showed her being overstimulated, and she gets the same way when in a social situation.  I don't usually bring the camera along to playgroup (I don't want to be THAT mom with the camera, lol) but I'll see if I can do so tomorrow and catch it so you all can see what I'm talking about.  

 

I too didn't like that I had to talk about her in front of the doctor, which is a huge reason why I made the list.  My husband and I try not to discuss anything regarding this in front of DD.  

 

We do talk about situations prior to them happening.  I haven't given her a ton of guidance- I've been trying to see if she'd learn social expectations on her own by just being in a social situation and observing others interacting (adults and children alike).  I try to model normal social behavior for her, greeting people appropriately, etc.  but she just hasn't picked up on anything. 

 

Oh wow... this is huge.  I was typing up this post and started thinking about social cues and I wondered if she could tell me which face was happy/sad/angry/surprised on a feelings chart.  So I checked (with a few charts, to make sure that it wasn't just the individual chart.  I asked her "Which face looks happy?" and she would point to a different face.  Same with the other feelings.  Is this normal for a 3 year old, or should she be able to understand that?  

 

post #60 of 81

WindyCityMom, please accept this in the supportive tone and attitude I intend it.  Do you know many 3 year olds, I mean really observed them when they're free range in a play space (ie not being micro-directed by a parent), or when they're comfortable and just being?  I've now watched all of the videos and I don't see all these labels you're applying.  Labels are heavy, heavy things and they can start to shape a child - if you consider a child as primarily their label (social anxiety, asperger's), they're more likely to become that label.  Labels can be freeing (ie explaining what's happening so that it can be accomodated or worked on), but they can also become defining and inhibiting.

 

All that said, I'm only seeing snippets via the internet - you could be totally right, but these videos aren't adding up to those labels for me.

 

Out of Sync child is a good one, as is The Mislabeled Child (more technical, doctory, but readable).  You might like Syndrome Mix:

 

http://books.google.com/books?id=DmUpCSlnmKAC&printsec=frontcover&dq=syndrome+mix&hl=en&ei=aaZlTcTbN5CusAOcocjvBA&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=1&ved=0CCwQ6AEwAA#v=onepage&q&f=false

(the above link includes free preview)

 

Here's Out of Sync with preview:

http://books.google.com/books?id=3gtL9XaZ8GwC&printsec=frontcover&dq=out+of+sync+child&hl=en&ei=jKZlTZHlF5SCsQOywNnlBA&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=1&ved=0CCoQ6AEwAA#v=onepage&q&f=false

 

Have you read the DSM criteria for Asperger's?  I've quoted it below, and notice that it speaks of qualitative and clinically significant - there are known, valid measures that can be used to determine this, and their use is the clinical standard across most jurisdictions.

 

Did the ped refer her for further evaluation?  If she has an ASD diagnosis, do you get access to more resources than if she doesn't? 

 

 

Quote:
 (I)  Qualitative impairment in social interaction, as manifested by at least two of the following:
(A) marked impairments in the use of multiple nonverbal behaviors such as eye-to-eye gaze, facial expression, body posture, and gestures to regulate social interaction
(B) failure to develop peer relationships appropriate to developmental level
(C) a lack of spontaneous seeking to share enjoyment, interest or achievements with other people, (e.g.. by a lack of showing, bringing, or pointing out objects of interest to other people)
(D) lack of social or emotional reciprocity
(II) Restricted repetitive & stereotyped patterns of behavior, interests and activities, as manifested by at least one of the following:
(A) encompassing preoccupation with one or more stereotyped and restricted patterns of interest that is abnormal either in intensity or focus
(B) apparently inflexible adherence to specific, nonfunctional routines or rituals
(C) stereotyped and repetitive motor mannerisms (e.g. hand or finger flapping or twisting, or complex whole-body movements)
(D) persistent preoccupation with parts of objects
(III) The disturbance causes clinically significant impairments in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning.

(IV) There is no clinically significant general delay in language (E.G. single words used by age 2 years, communicative phrases used by age 3 years)

(V) There is no clinically significant delay in cognitive development or in the development of age-appropriate self help skills, adaptive behavior (other than in social interaction) and curiosity about the environment in childhood.

(VI) Criteria are not met for another specific Pervasive Developmental Disorder or Schizophrenia."

 

Have you looked at the PBS Developmental Tracker?  It's good:

 

http://www.pbs.org/parents/childdevelopmenttracker/three/index.html

 

Finally, from other posts of yours that I've read, there's a lot of stuff going on in your lives.  Children are barometers of their environment, so it's reasonable to think that some of this is in response to her environment.  Plus, she's 3.  Verbally precocious 3 year olds are confusing, as they speak beyond their years yet have the same emotional needs of other 3 year olds and are quirky like other 3 year olds - and 3 year olds are quirky by the very nature of their developmental stage.

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