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Was unable to convince relatives to not circumcise their newborn....

post #1 of 14
Thread Starter 

mecry.gifI tried my very best, I really did. I sent out a circumcision information pack along with Dr Mendelsohn's book and a baby sling for her. When she failed to mention it at all (knew that was a not good sign), I then sent her an email about circumcision and how you are supposed to protect your baby, etc. Didn't hear anything at all. So, I finally sent a letter to her, pleading to keep her baby whole, and I described the circumcision process to her. Her mother then called me and screamed at me, I guess it's better to be mad at me than to blame the doctors who do this to infants. So, I really did try my best. They had a boy (I had a feeling they would), she went in for an induction and knew she would get a c-section (she did). So, since they decided to let doctors do that to her baby, I am going to donate to ARCLAW and become a member. At least that is something positive I can do, and I will keep placing information about circumcision whenever I get an opportunity to do so. I refuse to get discouraged because I throw in the towel, then they win. 

post #2 of 14

((hug))

 

poor baby

 

post #3 of 14

Hugs momma.  You did everything within your power to protect him.  You can't control what their ultimate decision is, no matter how upsetting it is.  I am in a very similar situation with a relative expecting her first boy, and I have done what I can do to give her the information she needs to keep her son intact.  It is out of my hands now.   Most of the time people circumcise their sons, they sadly believe they are truly making the best choice for their child and do it out of a desire to protect them.  Dunno if that helps you feel better or not to know that this child is loved. 

 

post #4 of 14

I know how you feel...I couldn't save my nephew either.  :(  But I made a difference elsewhere so keep the faith and keep speaking out on behalf of children everywhere!

post #5 of 14
They may have seen it as unwanted advice, especially after they ignored it but you continued sending them information.

I'm sorry this happened to you though. It is always frustrating to feel our efforts are wasted. ARCLAW seems like a good cause. I hadn't heard of it before seeing your post and looking it up.
post #6 of 14
hug.gif to you and to that poor little boy.
post #7 of 14

Kudos to you for trying. At least you know that you did everything you could to save that poor baby. There won't be any lingering "what if" doubts. Also congratulations on your ongoing intactivism. I think that will be therapeutic for you.

post #8 of 14

You tried.  That's all you can do.  I've tried and failed with two of my friends.  Though, one of these friends recently revealed that they had their son circ'ed and he had complications with it.  She didn't go into detail. 

 

Culture, ritual and ignorance are often too powerful to compete with.

post #9 of 14

I would send a donation to Intact America in the baby's name - I think they send out acknowledgment cards. 

post #10 of 14
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fyrestorm View Post

I would send a donation to Intact America in the baby's name - I think they send out acknowledgment cards. 


Wow.  I would be irate if someone did that to me!  And I'm about as anti-circ as they come.

 

OP, I'm sorry your efforts didn't pay off - remember though that its hard to know exactly why people do things.  You don't know what happens inside their home - maybe mom really regrets it and won't do it to her next.  It's not your fault the baby was circ'd.  It's hard, but letting it go is really important.  You didn't fail, you did your best, which is all you can do.

post #11 of 14

I'm sorry it didn't pay off, but I say keep trying.  I would have loved it if someone did that for me when I was pregnant with my 1st son, it would have stopped me from circ'ing him!  I regret it to this day, and kept my 2nd son intact (much to the chagrin of some of my family members). 

post #12 of 14
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fyrestorm View Post

I would send a donation to Intact America in the baby's name - I think they send out acknowledgment cards. 



Or donate to Foregen, the non-profit that is trying to convince regenerative medicine experts to pay attention to victims of foreskin amputation. 

 

post #13 of 14

I'm sorry. I think it's harder to intervene with family than with friends or even strangers. For so many people the family dynamics going way back get in the way. I wasn't able to save any of my nephews on my husband's side from circumcision, and it caused an enormous rift in my family for complicated reasons. All you can do is what you did, and if you keep trying with people you know less intimately than your family, you may be surprised how easy it is to get people thinking when it isn't a family thing.

post #14 of 14

hug.gif

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