Planning on homeschool son with autism.. need advice please!

[mamanoish]

Hi all, 

My husband and I have just started talking about schooling for our son, who is diagnosed high functioning ASD. He is not quite 3, but we are planning ahead! He has therapy through the Early Steps program and is getting ready to transition into the public school system Child Find program for physical, occupational, behavioral and speech therapy. The way they have treated us so far has really made us weigh our options and consider home schooling our son. One of the main reasons being he is SMART, but everyone gets hung up on his "label". We have taught him so much at home just being parents. ABC's & all of their sounds, counting to 50 so far, colors, shapes... just a lot of things that people have always said he'd be delayed.. and we consider him pretty advanced. But we also know what he likes, how he likes to learn and what areas he excels in. Yet people get caught up on that diagnosis and assume that he won't be "as smart" because "he has autism." They are also planning on putting him in special needs classes BEFORE they can even see if he can function in a typical class setting. He goes to a typical preschool and is the only kid with ASD, and does fine with it. So because of this, we've 99% settled on homeschooling. But... where do we begin!!

I work as a lactation counselor, and have already discussed working from home/changing my hours to HS. We also have a 5 year old son, but we have a blended family (my DH is his step dad) and his father has not yet let me know if he is ok with HS. I'd love to HS both of my boys (and would be starting this coming school year with him if his dad gives me the ok)  but am sort of at a loss on where to begin. One of my co-workers HS and has helped me with all of the legal aspects, but I haven't yet gotten my feet wet as far as looking at curricula, planning what is in the future for us.. or really HOW to HS a child with special needs. He has a speech delay, sensory integration disorder and is developmentally delayed in almost all areas, but is high functioning. Loves learning. Can anyone point me in the right direction or share their stories and wisdom? I greatly appreciate it! 

[KimPM]

Definitely start researching what kind of curriculum would work for both you and him.  I used this book: http://www.amazon.com/100-Top-Picks-Homeschool-Curriculum/dp/0805431381/ref=rsl_mainw_dpl?ie=UTF8&m=ATVPDKIKX0DER .  The book helped me figure out what kind of teaching style works for me and what kind of learning style my DS (w/ Aspergers) has.  We did a lot of unschooly things up until this year, when I really wanted to get something more formal.  There are also some curriculum reviews in the book, as well as on her website here: http://cathyduffyreviews.com/ .  There are more curriculum reviews here on mothering, in the product review area.

Be realistic in your assessment of how much time you actually have to prepare.  With one child on the spectrum as well as another child, your preparation time will likely be limited.  So choose a curriculum accordingly. 

We are using the Sonlight curriculum, it's books-based.  It works for us, but you may choose something different.  There are other books-based curricula as well.  However, there are other options, if you'd prefer something more structured or classical, etc.  The book I referred to you above explains the different styles of HS-ing.

You also want to check the homeschool requirements in your state, what kinds of records you need to keep, hoops you might have to jump through, whatever. 

A good thing to do is to start working on a list of the kinds of things you'd like him to learn and be exposed to.  This is what you'd be working toward, your driving reasons for HS.

As far as receiving services, we are not getting anything through the county anymore.  We went through EI for feeding therapy, and they were absolutely no help.  We then paid out of pocket to get some good feeding therapy that was successful.  We are also paying out of pocket for social skills classes.  I figure anything else we might get for "free" through the county, well we'd get what we pay for it.  Or worse.

If you can arrange to HS and you think it will work for your DS, then go for it!

Don't forget to find some local support in the form of homeschool groups in your area, yahoo groups, groups through your church, etc.

[mamanoish]

Great! Thanks! I just ordered the book from amazon, along with a few others. I looked at some of the reviews and it seems to have an easy chart style list of different options, which sounds great. I have read through review after review, but it's much easier to see the different strong points of each choice and what would suit us best all laid out in front of me.

My co-worker HS five kids, but so far she is the only one I know who has/is HSing. So I will definitely look into groups. Thanks! Everyone's #1 criticism so far is "how will you socialize him?" But... how have I socialized him for the last 2 years? Play dates, play groups, parks, his bible school in our church and activities. That argument just doesn't make any sense to me. 

[KimPM]

Originally Posted by mamanoish 

My co-worker HS five kids, but so far she is the only one I know who has/is HSing. So I will definitely look into groups. Thanks! Everyone's #1 criticism so far is "how will you socialize him?" But... how have I socialized him for the last 2 years? Play dates, play groups, parks, his bible school in our church and activities. That argument just doesn't make any sense to me. 

Yeah, the socialization argument is rather bogus.  You'll see a lot of commentary on that topic in the forum.  Most of the socialization I had as a kid was outside of school hours anyway.  If you find a local HS group, that's a great way to HS him.  There's also the youth groups in church when he gets older.  Being that he's on the spectrum, you may have to work a bit harder to actually "teach" him the socialization that usually comes naturally to other kids anyway, whether he's in a school or at home learning.

Oh, and last year I put out a feeler on SN curricula on the special needs forum here.  Others with children on the spectrum had used Five in a Row (books-based) and Heart of Dakota (books based).  Also, you may not be able to get everything in one place...ie you may get your math and/or science programs separately from your core program.  I think that once you start looking at learning styles and curricula, it will become apparent to you what type of curriculum works best for your family.  Then you can narrow down the exact one you like from those within the same type.  Your DS is still young, and his learning style may change as he matures.  Keep that in mind too.

I've had to tailor the presentation of material to my DS.  There are ways in which he absorbs material, and other ways that he just doesn't.  It's okay to change the presentation, skip around, add other supplemental material, however you need to present it so that your DS learns best.

Are  you considering HS-ing your oldest as well?

[Mittsy]

We're looking into this for dd(almost 6) who we're pretty sure has HFA/AS, it's a curriculum to help out kids on the spectrum with social things:

http://www.socialthinking.com/

Handwriting without tears was created by a OT for children with fine motor delays:

http://www.hwtears.com/

As far as curricula, we're Waldorf-inspired and DD is loving Oak Meadow.

[mamanoish]

Originally Posted by KimPM 

Are  you considering HS-ing your oldest as well?

Yes, that's probably why my mind is racing so much about all of this. He is currently 5, will be started kindergarten this coming school year. However, his father and I are divorced (and I am remarried with DS2, who is 2) and he hasn't agreed so far. I called him and we talked about it, gave him all of my reasons and how I think it is something we can work together on as parents, and I think he would very much enjoy HS. I already have to drag him out of bed to get him to preschool, which is in our church and full of people he knows and loves. Yet loves doing activities, learning games, crafts and worksheets at home with me. His father didn't say no, but did say he would like to think about it and weigh the pros and cons before deciding. So fingers crossed! 

[mamanoish]

Originally Posted by Mittsy 

We're looking into this for dd(almost 6) who we're pretty sure has HFA/AS, it's a curriculum to help out kids on the spectrum with social things:

http://www.socialthinking.com/

Handwriting without tears was created by a OT for children with fine motor delays:

http://www.hwtears.com/

As far as curricula, we're Waldorf-inspired and DD is loving Oak Meadow.

Thank you for this! I liked the social thinking stuff, looks like something my son would enjoy.I will definitely read into these.