BFing mamas, does your partner ever "put the baby to bed"?

[lemontree]

If so, how?  What does it look like?

DH works a lot of nights and DS (16mths) needs the boob to fall asleep right now...I read about partners "putting the baby down" and I wonder - at what point did your babe switch from "only mama will do"  at bedtime? 

[blessed.mommy]

Ben preferred to be put down to bed (and sometimes for naps) by DH until he was about 12 months old. After he turned 12 months, it seemed to be a lot easier for me to nursing him and put him down, when before he'd nurse and if I put him to bed after he was asleep...he was wide awake. 

[limabean]

While nursing, I put each baby to bed myself. Once they weaned, my DH pretty much took over the whole bedtime routine -- I do it maybe once every 2-3 months. He does bath, brushing teeth, stories/songs, and bed for each kid, every night.

Once they weaned, neither of them had any problem with him doing the bedtime routine, but he was already super involved in everything except nursing, so it wasn't a dramatic change for them.

Every great once in a while, one of them will request that I put them to bed, and I oblige, but our normal routine is that DH does it. 

[fruitfulmomma]

Around 2 years old because I am usually pregnant and too cranky at that point, but right now we don't have another one on the way and dd4, 26mo, is a major booby monster. But when he does it, he is usually rocking them to sleep while working at the computer and then lays them down with me.

[crunchy_mommy]

DH has tried to put 2yo DS to bed a handful of times but has only succeeded maybe twice. Occasionally I am able to cuddle DS while DH sings to him (like when I was sick & too hoarse to sing) but even that is rare & involves more crying than I'd like. I don't mind the bed thing *as much* since we all go to bed around the same time, but I would LOVE if DH could put DS down for a nap, because I'm constantly interrupting my day to get him to nap (or even delaying DS's nap if I'm doing something important) and I feel it's kind of hard on me... but DS just won't nap except nursing in my lap. *sigh*

[oregonianmama]

Very interested in hearing some more replies! My little guy is 17 months and i am excited about the day that DH can do bedtimes...at least once in awhile ;)

[Ldavis24]

This is a timely thread as DH tried to put DD (20 months) down for bed for the first time in months tonight.
For a stretch from maybe 6 months to 11 months DH was the ONLY person who could put DD down for bed. She freaked out if it was me.
Then all of a sudden it was mama and it has been ever since.
Tonight he tried and it went miserably, I was on downstairs listening to them on the baby monitor and she was just bleating "mama" over and over little a sheep with a few sobs in between. I literally lasted all of 2 minutes before I ran upstairs, kicked DH out of the room and laid down with her.

We are at a really frustrating point right now, she doesn't fall asleep easily and I have been just pulling away from her and saying "it's bedtime" over and over again. She eventually settles down with little fussing but it takes at least 40 minutes.

I am interested to hear other's mama's experiences in this area. I would love for DH to be able to put DD to sleep again.

[1blueheron]

I too have heard rumors about this thing where a DP "puts the baby down," but I'd assumed it was euthanasia.

So, um, no, it doesn't happen here, but DD is still pretty young, and anyway while I'm nursing her down DH cleans the kitchen and does laundry.

[Surfer Rosa]

With my first, it wasn't until I weaned, but with my second, after he was a year old, I would nurse him, then pass him off to DH and he would read/snuggle him to sleep, and I would read to DD. There was an adjustment period, but it was sooo nice knowing that DS would go to sleep for others.

[Peony]

It doesn't happen here until later, DD1 was 3+, DD2 was younger just because we had DS by then, so about 2.5y. DS is almost 2 and it is quite amusing to think about DH attempting to put him to bed!

[JoyFilled]

My DH will proudly tell you that he has put DD to bed twice without me.  Both times he was holding her while playing computer games.  She will be 2 in April.

She naps perfectly well for daycare workers.  They just pat her back or hold her tight until she falls asleep.

[faeriecurls]

DH can get her to take naps on the mornings I work, and can often get her back to sleep if she wakes up and won't go back to sleep in the middle of the night. He has tried 2x to put her to sleep for the night and it was really hard and more like she took a nap - and a really short one. But he has tried when I had to be out of the house for work late.

[creillysheehan]

We weaned Sweetie B when Baby G was on the way.  Bedtime nursing was the last to go--and we did it (in the summer) by doing bedtime routine (Daddy did this part), then going for a walk.  Sweetie B fell asleep in the stroller and stayed asleep for transfer into bed.  After a couple months, Daddy was able to simply read, cuddle, and rock Sweetie B to sleep, then move him into bed.  We expect to do something similar for Baby G once the days get longer, so we at least have bedtime choices.  She's 16 months now. 

[IngaAnne]

My husband puts my son to bed as often as I do. My son is currently 20 months old, but we've been doing this since my son was an infant (can't remember the exact age). He doesn't actually fall asleep at the boob anymore, so that makes it possible for my husband and I to share the bedtime duties. I breastfeed my son, then either my husband or I will put on his second jammie layer (it's cold in our old house). One of us will then bring my son up to his bed while he's still awake, where he'll talk to himself for maybe 10 minutes then fall asleep.

Recently, I went back to work part-time. Two nights a week I don't get home until after 9pm, so I was worried my little boy would have a big issue not having his "booba" before bed. On the nights I work, my husband gives him a nighttime fruit smoothie (blended banana and blueberries) and that seems to be enough to fill his tummy so he's comfortable enough to go to sleep (I usually wake him up when I get home to breastfeed so he'll sleep through the night). I was very surprised, but delighted that my son can have a drama-free bedtime with just his daddy there. It is possible!

[akind1]

DH can, and does, cuddle DS to sleep for naps and bedtime. He does naptime daily, as I either WAH or WOH and it is easier for him to do it. since he is in school 4 night s a week, DS usually falls asleep in the car on the way back from my parents' house to our house and stays asleep for the transfer.

What I would LOVE is if DH could get DS to go back to sleep during the night. DS wakes at least once at night to nurse (he starts in his crib, then joins us after wake up). I am pregnant with #2 and have not a whole lot of milk (plus I am just plain sore and tired) and would love to give up these night time session(s). They are the only nursing sessions left. Kind of sad, but I will be glad of a bit of break before #2 arrives. But the times DH has tried, he can't get DS back to sleep, only entertained. Until he sees me, then it is game over. (FWIW - DS used to STTN -until 5 or 6 a.m., but hasn't in a couple, or maybe a few, months I wish he would!)

[Madalyn]

Originally Posted by 1blueheron 

I too have heard rumors about this thing where a DP "puts the baby down," but I'd assumed it was euthanasia.
 

This made me lol so bad. DH has never put our son to bed. He always nurses to sleep. 

[Dandelionkid]

Around age two with all three kids my DH started to put them to sleep without me. It helped that I did evening work so it was a requirement about twice a week. They all transitioned amazingly when he started laying them down awake and it was the start of me not nursing them to sleep.

[LiLStar]

dh does 21month ds's bedtime EVERY night, and has for quite some time. To the point where if he goes out of town and I have to do both kids bedtimes myself, i panic!! ITs SO hard for me! He *will not* go to sleep just lying in bed nursing down. For naps, I sit in a chair in dd's room and nurse him down then transfer. Can't do that when dd is going to bed in her room because her presence will distract him too much, especially if she makes noise (she's  very...) Anyway, night usually begins in our bed everyone cuddling and playing and being silly, and plenty of nursing too. Then River gets a hug, a polar bear kiss (noses) a kitty cat kiss (rubbing cheeks) butterfly kiss (eyelashes) and a "mommy kiss" (forehead) then a SQUISH (tight hug) then I pass him to dh and take dd to her room. Most of the time he throws a big fit when I leave, but usually calms down quickly. dh just hangs out in bed next to him using his lap top and playing music till he passed out.

This routine sorta came to be when there'd be times I'd be like, "GAAAHH I cannot get that boy to sleep, YOU try it!" in complete frustration. Then he'd go in there and have him asleep in minutes. And I'd be like, what'dya do, drug him? lol. It gradually became him doing it ALL the time

[goldenwillow]

Originally Posted by Madalyn 

This made me lol so bad. DH has never put our son to bed. He always nurses to sleep. 

Same boat here!  I am hopeful for the day.