Originally Posted by mooshersmama
I've heard that rule, but only in the context of how ridiculous it is.
I'd have been so sad if my friends hadn't come to my wedding because they couldn't afford to pay for their meal! That's not why we had food and drinks and all that. I had 3 or 4 people come to my first wedding with no gifts at all, and it wasn't a big deal. I wanted them there - that's why I invited them, yk?
I buy wedding gifts based on what I can afford, what I think the couple will like, and to some extent, who the couple is. I spent a little more than I could really afford on my bff's wedding gift, just because it was her, yk? She's been there for me for everything, and I didn't want to just pick her up a new coffee maker.
Gifts...let's see...before I got married, I gave a friend a fairly expensive coffee maker - not high end, but not super cheap. I can't remember what I gave my brother and his first wife (or his second wife, for that matter), but I do remember giving her an ironing board cover as a shower gift, and she was thrilled. For another shower, she got a budt pan (also thrilled). For another shower (she had four), I gave her two packs of coffee filters, and a pound of good coffee. But, I was in my early 20s, planning my own wedding, which cost me a chunk of change, and as the groom's sister, I was invited to all the showers, so I had to keep my costs down. She loved all the gifts. one of her relatives gave me a really strange look over the ironing board cover, but I don't care what third parties think of gifts I give, yk? The aforementioned bff was marrying a guy in his mid-40s with grown kids, and he had a fully equipped house. So, I ended up buying her a quite expensive (and beautiful) glass serving tray, as well as a glass flower in a wall vase. I wanted to give her something that would help make the house their house, not just his house.
I probably spent over $100 on bff's total gift. I've never spent that much on anyone else.