Input, thoughts or ideas - 5yr old delayed DS

[lucyem]

Background first.  My DS was born a couple of weeks early but it was not enough to not let him go home.  He had a lot of digestion issues and screamed non stop for 4 months until I figured out what to not eat.  He has always been about 6 months behind.  Had no interest in food until 14 months.  Walked on the late side, but not very late.  At 18 months he was not speaking at all and we had early intervention step in.  He had weekly speech therapy and then at 3 went to the public preschool.  At 4 he barely knew a couple of colors, though seems to have them down now.  He also tends to make overnight developmental jumps.  He is delayed and delayed and then suddenly jumps ahead.  I have seen this in him with everything from developmental things to speech to comprehension.

Now he is 5 and in kindergarten.  He is an August baby so one of the younger kids in class.  Socially he is also one of the younger kids.  His level of comprehension is not where it should be.  It is hard to explain but he just does not understand or is aware of certain things.  I can go over something with him again and again and again and it does not stick.  Like when we went on vacation and I was trying to teach him that if he got lost to "find a mommy".  He cannot identify most letters and numbers.  We have spent the past month with flashcards of 1-9 daily and he still cannot get 7 & 8.  At one point if you showed him 8 he would count "5-6-7-8, it's 8".  But that has stopped.  Since Christmas I see a new level of frustration in him with school.  He says he hates it and does not want to go back.  Then when he gets off the bus I get hit with very tired and frustrated kid.  It is only half day.  Suddenly we have gone back to naps.  I had a long conversation with the teacher the other day.  They see the same things but not the frustration.  He is happy in school, which I know he is.  But he prefers to play, cannot blame him there :)  And school work is hard.  She said there are times he will say something is too hard.  Right now he gets OT and speech.  OT (a special gym class) to help work on memory and following directions and speech working on not only his verbal speech but back up letter and number recognition.  His speech therapist says how she will think he gets something but then later it is gone.  Things just do not make it into his memory.  At home we do what we can.  Board games to practice number recognition, memory games etc etc.  Leapster games hoping it will help.  

By law they have to do a whole big evaluation soon.  I am waiting to hear if it will be this spring or in the fall when his IEP is up.  Hearing and vision were tested and are fine.  Hopefully we can get a better idea of what is going on.

Honestly I was not happy with his being moved up to kindergarten this year.  I wanted him in preschool another year.  But preschool would have only been 3 days a week and he needs more school time.  Plus there was some school/state politics involved.  At the beginning of this year his K teacher had some valid points as to why he should not stay back in kindergarten again.  But when we spoke the other day she and I discussed options.  It almost sounds like she is torn.  Right now he will proceed to first.  I could argue for K again and probably get it.  Another option would be all day K.  He would go to morning and afternoon.  It has been done before and it would give him two teachers with two types of teaching.  But I hesitate because next year there will be a new K teacher and the other one who is staying is not a good match for my DS at all.  

I get so sad for him sometimes.  Today we had lunch out and I kept showing him letters and he could not name any of them.  I worry we are looking at 12 years of frustration with school.  

[Tjej]

Forum crashing, but I have read on a number of threads on MDC about people whose kids have really benefitted from seeing a developmental opthamologist - there can be eye issues that don't show up on a regular screening.

I'm sorry you're at a frustrating place and I hope others can chime in with more ideas/help as well.

Tjej

[karne]

Have you had a full eval yet, or is this what you are waiting for?  If so, I would push for the spring for the big eval.  Your child is fairly young, but it sounds like both you and the school have valid concerns about comprehension/retention of information.  If your child has an IEP, you can call a meeting to discuss progress and plan for the next year...I'm just not sure where you are at in the diagnostic process.