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MIL is kicking us out. - Page 6

post #101 of 195
Quote:
Originally Posted by WindyCityMom View Post

We got the apartment biggrinbounce.gif



YAY! Best feeling in the world right!

post #102 of 195
Quote:

Originally Posted by zebra15 View Post

 

I find it hard to believe that you dont have any friends. 

 


Are you serious?

 

I didn't have any friends for maybe 6 years until recently. And the fact that I can say I have a friend is pretty loose, it's not like I am just calling her up or sharing my problems or leaning on her for anything.

 

Does everyone in the world have friends? I doubt it. Comments like this sure don't help the friendless feel any better either.

 

post #103 of 195

yup another relatively friendless mama...

My senior year in high was not a fun time...ZERO friends.

 

Now I have a few friends but none I would call crying to either.

post #104 of 195


 

Quote:
Originally Posted by WindyCityMom View Post



I totally know what you're talking about and wonder this as well.  Either way, I'll have to take the bus.  

 

I *was* thinking about seeing if MIL would go for husband selling his car for 1500 and paying her 1500 for the truck.  However, it needs a new transmission, and if I were to learn to drive it (which would be my intention to eliminate the busses since DD has pretty bad social anxiety [please don't knock this, it's real and it's getting worse as she gets older, she's seeing developmental specialists] and will be needing to be on the bus several times per week) I'd be putting more gas in it.

 

I need to weigh the odds... 

 

Little blue escort = $80/mo in my bus pass, $60/mo gas, $25/mo insurance (just checked) = $240 (plus DD and her social anxiety)

Blue explorer= $150/mo in gas, $26/mo insurance (checked for this vehicle with both of us added) = $176 (no social anxiety for DD)

No vehicles= $160/mo in bus passes, loss of valuable work hours, and added anxiety for DD.

 

^can someone check the above for me please? Did I miss anything (obviously city sticker, but say DH loses an hour at work per day for travek, which is about $10-$12/day.  That's $200/month. If I were to lose an hour/day at (prospective) job, It'd be around $150/month lost.  A city sticker costs like $60 once/yr.

 

It seems cheaper to drive- wdyt?  Also, I don't mind parking a block away from the destination if driving (and no free parking) and spending 2 mins extra to walk.  The doctor's office has a (Free) parking lot, and the developmental specialists have meters which are like $2 each time we go- and there is free parking about a block away.

 

What seems better?  Obviously I'd need to learn to drive but DH could teach me that in no time (I have someone else willing to help as well).  I'd need $20 to go pass my permit exam (passed it a few years ago and answered it all correct- I've been studying the rules of the road book as well).


 

 


Coming from the perspective of a family without a car in the city, here are my thoughts on the bold... remember that $160 would be your max per month.  It's quite possible it could be less depending on how many trips you both need to make. We get by quite comfortably with one monthly pass and one pay per use pass for $140/mo  My husband uses the monthly pass because he has his own business which requires frequently site visits all over the city, but I only use about $60/mo on the pay per trip pass as a quite active homeschooling mom.  You might be surprised how many trips you can make before getting the unlimited monthly pass becomes necessary.

 

Also, I don't understand why your husband would be losing work hours by using public transit.  Can you give more info? Does the bus not run early enough or something?  Does he have to travel in the middle of the work day? Perhaps I could suggest a work around if you can give more details.

 

 

 

 

 

post #105 of 195



 

Quote:
Originally Posted by WindyCityMom View Post

We got the apartment biggrinbounce.gif



 That's awesome news!  Get packing, get the hell out and don't look back!  You are giving your children an amazing gift.

 

I don't know if you saw my earlier post (I think it got buried between some longer posts) but I strongly suggest you consider applying to www.modestneeds.org.  I have no doubt you would qualify and an extra little bit will be so helpful.

 

Good luck!

 

Martha

post #106 of 195

thumb.gif joy.gif RIGHT ON!!!! way to GO mama!!!!

 

for me it has worked out much cheaper without a car. i need transmission replace and dont have the $$$s. plus with gas prices and the amount of driving woah my monthly gas expenditure would have gone way up. plus car repairs, 

 

i'd say just on the car i'd be spending $120 every month (all expenses - insurance, gas, repairs, etc). however i dont have a dd with social anxiety.

 

while the car is sooo much convenient, it is a pain around the neck if you dont have backup funds and repairs ahead. there are always some small repairs.

 

perhaps you guys can have one bus pass so that one of you can use the bus and one the car depending on what you are doing. 

 

hope the truck consumes as much gas as your car does and not more. so the truck needs a new transmission? i wouldnt touch that with a long pole. not bring in more trouble than you already have on ur plate. 

 

i dont either get why you would be losing work time while commuting? are you talking about might take half hour in car while it would take 1 1/2 by bus. that has nothing to do with employed hours. esp. for you since you dont have a job yet. you factor in that hour from home, not work. that part does not make sense to me either. 

post #107 of 195

Congrats on the apartment!

post #108 of 195

I can guess that the car would increase her DH's work hours on two accounts:

 

- Less commute time, so he can spend more time at work that he would otherwise be commuting. Sure, he could have the commute eat into his family time instead of his work time, but it sounds like he's motivated to spend extra time at work if it comes out of commute time instead.

- He could be looking at making a sale but, darn, he has to leave and catch the bus. If he had a car, he could stay as long as it takes to complete the sale and then head on outta there.

 

I don't have an opinion on whether the car would actually be worth it or not, but I can see the reason why it could affect his paycheck. Maybe not enough to be worthwhile, but certainly it would affect it.

post #109 of 195

I've been lurking...

 

I'm happy for you guys that you got the apartment. I do, however, thing it's way too expensive, but then again - I live in Eugene, OR, not Chicago, IL...so I have no clue what apartments cost there. If I were you though, I'd keep your eye out for a cheaper place even once you move. I know moving is a huge hassle, but you might be able to save $100+/mo and that really can help!

 

Haha - I am so with you on the "$100 man money" being absurd! COME ON! My Dh brings in $40k+/yr and he doesn't get $100 man money. Together, we have $100 "fun" money a month for dates and whatnot. But his own man money? Okay, occasionally he gets things - when he wants them...if we have the extra money (which right now, we don't), but as an entitlement? If we were broke as hell, barely making it? HAH.

 

And the no friends thing...I don't even know how this came up? I must've missed that post. I did read in some of your other threads you "talking" about having a friend come over or whatever, but who cares? Even if you didn't have friends...well...that's believable. I hardly have any friends. Maybe 2? And can I count on them all the time? Not really. They are busy and have kids and lives...yeah.

 

Phones! Tracfone is awesome. You can cheaply get a phone with double minutes for life at walmart or target and there is no monthly bill - just buy a minute card as you need it. The minutes can be expensive - but the double minutes help. Oh! And if you are mostly texting it's awesome because each text only uses .3 minutes...so you get 3 texts for each minute...great deal :)

 

Again...good luck!

post #110 of 195

Oh! And renters insurance is actually pretty cheap - you can bundle it with your car insurance. We have $25,000 protection, which is kinda ridiculous because we don't even own that much stuff (but I guess it's kinda the baseline of insurance?) and it's under $12/mo.

post #111 of 195

You have an EXTREMELY tight budget once you consider all the incidentals that can and will come up.  How much chance does your husband have for increasing his income in the future?  I know you said something about moving up but how much more will he make and will it be enough?  could he go higher than that eventually to make more?

 

Paying minimum payments on a credit card, especially at high interest, will NEVER have you paying them off.  You will end up paying so much more than you spent in the first place, it is ridiculous.  Obviously you can't afford to spend more than minimum payments right now but with how tight your budget is and your husband's low income, I think you need to SERIOUSLY reconsider working full time.

 

There are ways to get really cheap daycare (my friend here currently gets it) and although the thought of putting my kid in daycare makes my stomach turn you need to consider what is truly best for your kids.  Living pay check to pay check for years and years and taking on the stress that comes with financial struggle which affects your health and marriage and yes, even the kids... or dealing with daycare for a few years while you help increase the income so you can hopefully start paying more than minimum one day and actually pay off the credit cards.

 

Someone else upthread mentioned how you could potentially get a job working at the center your kids go for day care and this would be an excellent option.  You can keep an eye on them and still get a full 40 hour work week.  It might not be an option though and you might need to work elsewhere but I do think you need to very seriously reconsider if it is worth it to keep them out of daycare when your budget is so tight, and possibly not enough.  Especially if your husband is not on track to be making much more ever, you need to help fill in the gaps somehow.  You are going to need some breathing room to relax... living like this for the next.. four years?  til both kids are in school and you can work more is not going to lead to good things.

post #112 of 195

Have you thought about waiting tables or tending bar at night to bring in some extra cash? Chicago is full of restaurants. . .

 

I have friends who make a couple of hundred bucks in a night waiting tables.

post #113 of 195
Quote:
Originally Posted by WindyCityMom View Post

There will be no extra $100 for going out for "man time".  That's absurd.  Just because he owns a penis doesn't mean he gets to blow $100 per month on whatev.  Nuh uh.

 

No eating out.  Oh, and he doesn't work at a pizza place ;) He's a commissioned sales associate @ Sears Auto Center.  Right now his manager is showing him the ropes because he's looking for "benchers" (who will replace him in case he gets promoted to district manager or the like).  He thinks DH is a good cantidate for that so that's what they're doing...

 


Not just "man time" -- is there pressure for him to join the other guys at work to go out for lunch?   grab a drink from the pop machine?  Get donuts and coffee?   If there is a culture of free-spending, a guy will often do it to fit in.     It might not feel to him like he's blowing a lot of cash if it's only $5 or $7 at a time, but that can easily add up to $100/month.

 

 

post #114 of 195

one thing to think about re: keeping the car.  You said $60 in gas/month, but that would be at current gas prices.  They're predicting prices to nearly double this summer.  Honestly, I think if it were me, I'd ditch the car, despite the social anxiety.  It would really suck to "fail" at life on your own over some stupid rising gas prices...  Anyway, I guess the point is, if you keep the car, budget at least double for gas.  Also, regarding gas, I wonder if the gas costs are likely to change since you're moving to a different part of the city?

post #115 of 195


 

Quote:
Originally Posted by meemee View Post

thumb.gif joy.gif RIGHT ON!!!! way to GO mama!!!!

 

for me it has worked out much cheaper without a car. i need transmission replace and dont have the $$$s. plus with gas prices and the amount of driving woah my monthly gas expenditure would have gone way up. plus car repairs, 

 

i'd say just on the car i'd be spending $120 every month (all expenses - insurance, gas, repairs, etc). however i dont have a dd with social anxiety.

 

while the car is sooo much convenient, it is a pain around the neck if you dont have backup funds and repairs ahead. there are always some small repairs.

 

perhaps you guys can have one bus pass so that one of you can use the bus and one the car depending on what you are doing. 

 

hope the truck consumes as much gas as your car does and not more. so the truck needs a new transmission? i wouldnt touch that with a long pole. not bring in more trouble than you already have on ur plate. 

 

i dont either get why you would be losing work time while commuting? are you talking about might take half hour in car while it would take 1 1/2 by bus. that has nothing to do with employed hours. esp. for you since you dont have a job yet. you factor in that hour from home, not work. that part does not make sense to me either. 


Totally agree with this. Trucks eat more gas, a year or so ago we went from a Nissan Sentra to a Trailblazer and even not driving much that thing eats more gas. Also repairs on trucks can be more believe me, someone busted our taillight that thing was $250 to repair. My budget is tight but I do have wiggle room for that kind of stuff, the budget you have does not. I know it can be a drag to take CTA but I also commuted for years on it and believe me as someone who now lives someplace with minimal public transit I wish I had the option.

 

In any event good luck and congrats on the new place!

 

post #116 of 195

Quote:

Originally Posted by beansmama View Post

I've been lurking...

 

I'm happy for you guys that you got the apartment. I do, however, thing it's way too expensive, but then again - I live in Eugene, OR, not Chicago, IL...so I have no clue what apartments cost there. If I were you though, I'd keep your eye out for a cheaper place even once you move. I know moving is a huge hassle, but you might be able to save $100+/mo and that really can help!


$750 for a two bedroom in a good area of Chicago is dirt cheap, almost unheard of. There might be less expensive apartments out there, but the chances are they will be in dangerous areas - as in rampant gangs, drugs, burglaries, etc. Unfortunately, if WCG wants to stay in Chicago $750 is probably the best she can find.

post #117 of 195
Quote:
Originally Posted by IxIa View Post

Quote:


$750 for a two bedroom in a good area of Chicago is dirt cheap, almost unheard of. There might be less expensive apartments out there, but the chances are they will be in dangerous areas - as in rampant gangs, drugs, burglaries, etc. Unfortunately, if WCG wants to stay in Chicago $750 is probably the best she can find.



I would punch an old lady in the face for an apartment that cheap even where we live!! I wouldn't really do that but 750 is amazingly low.

post #118 of 195

My Dh goes to work, is a supervisor and is surrounded daily by the other managers and supervisors who are constantly going out to eat, buying coffees, buying luches for *everyone* - yet, somehow, he manages just fine with bringing his own lunch daily, as well as his own brewed-at-home coffee. Sure, he *occasionally* eats out - less than once a month (at work, we eat out as a family more often) and has no problem with this.

 

I just don't get this line of thinking. You're basically saying that it's okay to give someone (a man, presumably) money for unnecessary things, even when that money doesn't exist, because he's going to be peer pressured and is apparently too weak to resist. eyesroll.gif

 

 

OP - I wouldn't worry about this as long as you and your DH are both on the same page financially. My husband doesn't mind not eating out, etc. etc. because, even though he knows we can afford it, he (like me) wants to save for emergencies, for a down payment on a house, etc. Of course, if you have a husband who thinks he's entitled to money for crap he doesn't need, despite the family budget, then that's another story entirely...

 

Originally Posted by savithny View Post




Not just "man time" -- is there pressure for him to join the other guys at work to go out for lunch?   grab a drink from the pop machine?  Get donuts and coffee?   If there is a culture of free-spending, a guy will often do it to fit in.     It might not feel to him like he's blowing a lot of cash if it's only $5 or $7 at a time, but that can easily add up to $100/month.

 

 



 

post #119 of 195
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ldavis24 View Post





I would punch an old lady in the face for an apartment that cheap even where we live!! I wouldn't really do that but 750 is amazingly low.


Haha - okay okay, got it. No punching old ladies please ;P
 

 

post #120 of 195

Im glad you are getting out.

 

I just wanted to add that you will most likely get more than $300-$400 of SNAP benefits. My DH works full time and we only have one child and we get $525.00 a month.

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