I feel your pain, I really do
I know that if it is adhesions, they have to surgically remove them, but I thought that was my problem, and it turns out, I don't have any, I am not sure how they can tell if you have them without opening you up
Sorry you are having such a hard time, God Bless your dh and mine too
here's to our fabulous husbands. I did find that after my second was born, I needed a lot more foreplay, and I needed the pressure off to "get the deed done", if I knew I didn't have to, I was more able to be open to the touch, and we worked at it until I was better, it wasn't until just before #3s conception that things got good again, and it was good throughout pregnancy too.
Oh- and a little of that champagne might help too, if you are so inclined, I have never been able to bring myself to even have one glass while nursing(or pregnant), but that is just how I am, I do think it might be of help in the sex area
Definitely see your Dr. though, I went to 3 different OBs to try to find the reason for the pain, and a solution.