My 12 yob (Jakob) wet the bed nightly until a year ago. He also has ADHD. People with ADHD have a higher incidence of bedwetting than others.... I read somewhere that 75% of people with ADHD have problems with bedwetting. I believe that bedwetting past the age of six is actually considered a symptom of ADHD when trying to diagnose.
Anyway, once we realized that we were in it for the long haul, we gave up and put him in GoodNites. They didn't always work; sometimes he would wet more than once a night, and the underpants could only hold so much. But, whether the GoodNites leaked or not, he had to shower every morning. Not only does pee smell, but it's really not good for your skin. If his bed was wet, he was responsible for stripping the bed and bringing his sheets and wet pajamas to the laundry room by the time he was five. At six, it was his job to wipe the plastic sheet with a wet cloth and spray it with Lysol. At about age seven or eight, it was his responsibility to put sheets back on his bed. He was not allowed to sleep on the couch or the floor, even with a GoodNite, unless there was a bedwetting pad or trash bag or something under him. He did wet on our couch once. He also wet (though the GoodNite) on an airplane. Luckily, most of it got on the blanket he was sitting on instead of the seat.
We never tried an alarm. You could drop a brick on his face and he wouldn't wake up.
He takes Wellbutrin for his mood problems and the ADHD. His ADHD is not really under control. A little over a year ago, his psychiatrist suggested Strattera to try and manage his ADHD a bit better. We decided to try it. The starting dose is 18 mg, and it gradually goes up until you reach the therapeutic does of 40 mg. We never made it that far; in the higher doses, it made him a nervous wreck. But.... he stopped wetting the bed that first week. We considered that it might be a coincidence, but when we discontinued the medication, he started wetting again. So he now takes 18 mg of Strattera for the bedwetting. It also helps him regulate his sleep patterns. He no longer stays up half the night with a million thoughts running through his brain, and it's no longer like pulling teeth to get him out of bed in the morning.
On a side note, we tried DDAVP (the medication for bedwetting) a couple of years ago and it didn't work for us.
I've noticed that Jakob is much less concerned with matters of hygiene than his younger brother (9). He would go days without showering or brushing his teeth if he were left to himself. I'm sure that if I weren't so particular, he would have smelled like pee a lot, too. He would have had no problem with getting in a stinky bed at night, nor would he have cared that he was stinky. The 9yo (Adam) wet the bed only once in a blue moon until about age six. Horrified, he'd be up in the middle of the night to shower and get clean sheets. He also cares if his hair is messy.