Need Some Advice!!!

[meagarou89]

I will be 33 weeks this Saturday. I have an appointment to switch into the care of a midwife and plan a home water birth or birthing center water birth this coming Wednesday. I've wanted to do a home water birth pretty much since the beginning of my pregnancy. I have Medicaid, and didn't think it was possible with Medicaid until I was at least 20 weeks. Once I found out I set up an appointment to switch to this midwife and I was so excited, but then I had forgotten to ask DH about it (lol) He had never really heard of a home water birth and he thought it was crazy, he was against it because he feared for mine and our second daughter's lives. So I didn't go through with the appointment. Now that he knows a little more about it, he's open to it. Although, he does feel more comfortable with us having her in a hospital.

With my first daughter, two years ago, I had been having contractions all night but since there was no water breakage or blood I didn't go to the hospital. I just kept drinking water and laying on my left side. I had a lot of BH when pregnant with her, and had been in the hospital for false labor, so I thought maybe it was just false labor. I slept on and off through that night. Then at 7 or 8 in the morning I got up to get more water, was in serious pain, and decided to go the bathroom. There was blood! That's when I knew the contractions were real. So then I woke DH up and we went to the hospital. By the time they checked me, I was 5 cm dilated, and I think I had already been 100% effaced before then because I had carried DD extremely low from about 23 weeks on. Also, when the doctor had checked me a couple weeks prior to that he said that the baby's head was "right there". I got the epidural a few hours later and then gave birth almost several hours after that. I had a fever during the labor and when they broke my water there was meconium in it. DD was born and didn't breathe right away, they had the respiratory specialists (?) there and ready to make sure all the meconium was out of her mouth and nose and what not. She had to stay the night in the NICU that night :( Luckily, I got to BF her every 3 hours and was able to nap in between feedings in my room so it wasn't so bad. Then she developed jaundice, bad enough that she had to be under the bilirubin light and we had to stay for 4 days. Now that I am a little more educated about epidurals, I feel like the problems we encountered were because of my epidural. Maybe I'm wrong, but still, I do not want an epidural this time. Not only for our baby's safety, but for my safety and a speedier recovery seeing as I'll be taking care of a toddler and a newborn!!

I love the idea of giving birth at home, in water. Or even at the birthing center in the water! It is really something I want to do, for a number of reasons:

-Our toddler will be able to stay close by, probably not in the same room but under the same roof and in a safe and clean environment. -I can move around, eat and drink as I please

-The water will be soothing and will make labor easier most likely

-When DD2 is born she will get to have immediate skin to skin contact

-DD2 will not have her umbilical cord cut until it has stopped pulsing

-We can sleep in our own bed that night

-DD2 can sleep in her co-sleeper that will be attached to the side of our bed

-We'll be able to be in the comfort of our own home

Now that is if everything goes right. But now I keep thinking about the "what ifs":

-What if DD2 is breech?

-What if she has an umbilical prolapse?

-What if my water breaks and there's meconium in it this time too?

-What if she has the cord wrapped around her neck and they don't release it till it's too late?

-What if I have really bad postpartum hemorrhage?

-What if I need an urgent C-Section?

-What if DD2 has should dystocia?

-What if DD2's is facing towards my front instead of the back?

I'm just so scared that something could happen to one of us, or both of us. Either way it'd be tragic!! The idea of being in a hospital and having access to immediate medical help is comforting to me... but is it a false sense of comfort? Is it really safer to be in the hospital than at home with the midwife?

[bird_verde]

Those are all great questions to ask your midwife when you meet with her on Wednesday.  With more knowledge and understanding of how the midwife handles these situations, you will find more comfort and peace with your decision, whatever it may be.  Midwives understand these questions and encourage that you ask them.  They are trained to handle these situations that you mentioned above based on their expereince, training and abilities.

Please know that many of us play the same "what if" game and think about all the things that can go wrong. And then we read about all the things that can go wrong.  And then someone tries to tell us about all the things that went wrong with them.  I did it all the time throughout both of my pregnancies and DD1 was a hospital birth, DD2 a homebirth.  But in fairness to yourself, you need to play the "what if" game with all the things that can go wrong at the hospital too. Each intervention that they may be eager to give you a hospital, may lead to a large complication which they correct with more intervention. 

Good luck with your decision.  I know you are probably anxious right nos, but you will feel better once you have a good discussion with the midwife.

[mdnaturalmama]

ITA agree with above poster. Ask your MW all of these things. Also reading some good books with lots of research based facts/statements in them are wonderful. Watching The Business of Being Born is great as well. All sorts of things are discussed in this movie and the books that are great for helping you to make a decision. Having a poll on here is tough b/c there are so many differing opinions. I am planning our first HBAC for this May and fully trust my MW, my body, my labor and my baby. I think those are all important things. But if you feel more comfortable in a birthing center then have it there. Good luck mama!  =)