We are TTC #2 and I am leaning toward a HB, but I'm conflicted because this preference is based more on process of elimination than an actual desire to birth at home.
DS was natural childbirth at a hospital two years ago. The birth was fine, not great or awful, but I had to advocate for myself to avoid interventions during labor. OB practice has a great doctor and three great midwives and then one doctor I don't like much. I would rotate prenatals and get whoever is on call for the birth. The hospital is my least favorite option, and it's the cheapest but not by much because we have a high deductible health plan.
Homebirth would be with a CNM with 30 years of experience who was recommended by my OB's office. I live 10 minutes from a community hospital and 20 minutes from a big hospital with full NICU (the one where I had my son). My biggest hangup is that I just can't quite visualize birthing at home. No practical reason why not, just can't see it. Maybe it's fear of a sudden complication and transfer, dreading explaining our plans to extended family, or just not wanting to disrupt my house. Also with my son I had a hard time laboring at home but really got into the zone once I got to the hospital. But maybe that will be better if I know I'm home for the long haul?
There's also a Birth Center about 15 minutes away, and it's 5 minutes from the big hospital. I like that we would be closer in the case of transfer, but I know that's pretty unlikely for a multip. It's recommended by my pediatrician. I would have to rotate through 4 different midwives for prenatals. I won't know which one will be on call until the day and none of them are as experienced as the HB midwife. I love the space, the big deep jacuzzi tubs, and I can totally see myself birthing there. It would be about $1000 more than HB.
Any thoughts? I feel like a whiner because I know a lot of people would kill to have these three options, but I just feel like nothing is right. If I'm choosing the option I dislike the least that makes it hard to get excited about giving birth. Maybe I will feel differently after I am actually pregnant. Ugh! Any advice? How do I choose between location (birth center) and care provider (HB midwife)?
Any feedback is appreciated!