~~~~MARCH 2011 INFERTILITY ONE THREAD~~~~ - Page 4

[renavoo]

Good for you, SimplyRochelle! I hope everything ends up working out! I find timing to be one of the most difficult things to handle in this TTC journey...Work has been so crazy that I haven't been able to get my endometrial biopsy done. And since timing is so important, it has been just way to difficult to fit it in!!

Julieven, I'm so sorry about what you had to go through. I hope that this time is successful and that it helps you heal from the pain of the past!!

Brichole, thank you for being the best moderator!! It's amazing having someone like you to talk to and the fact that you are so organized and really do respond to every post is heart warming!! I hope that when it's your time to start again that you can have luck quickly!

I think I'm in the minority in that I never had any side effects from the clomid. Perhaps a little minor nausea but really, that could have been anything. I'm really frustrated with clomid though because of what it does to my lining!! Oh, my RE wanted to trigger today but my DH and I decided to push back a little now... I'll go in tomorrow to get triggered...at least this way, my lining had an extra day or 2 to grow a bit. I know that starting out with a 4mm on Wednesday means that it'll still be too thin on Friday but I'll take what I can get.

My DH and I also made an appt with a new RE and we're fairly excited about the prospect...I know it sounds horrible to be so down about my chances this month but I just feel like my lining is way too thin for me to successfully conceive. We're still going through the IUI on Sat probably but still...I hope that this new RE will be more open to my questions. You know what really annoys me? Whenever I ask my current RE about something, she answers yes or no. Abrupt, with no explanation. Ummm hello, how about an explanation about why it's a no. Why can't I get estrogen or ANYTHING to help build my lining???! So hopefully, the new RE will be better about it. haha I'm a little sad though because my current RE is so convenient and also female. The new RE, which my DH found, is male. I haven't gone to a male doctor since I was a young girl!!

Jenger, by the way, I absolutely understand about not being followed. Honestly, I feel like my DH and I would have had the same amount of luck (and that's not much!) if we were not followed too. I mean, we spend about $1200 a round and really, I sometimes wonder if I didn't induce every month so early, maybe my lining would have been able to build up by the time I naturally would have ovulated and we might have had more luck getting pregnant. Also, at each visit, the doctor charges for a visit plus a sonogram so I'm really trying to cut down on the number of visits. Anyway, thanks for letting me vent!!

[brichole1214]

SimplyRochelle: I'm soooooo happy you went ahead and took the clomid and I PRAY that the emotional stuff stays away from you!!! I also hope that your O holds off long enough for you and DH to at least TRY to enjoy your BDing!!! LOL (trying to fit it in in a tiny car is never fun lol...but what a story later in life ha)  

renavoo: Thank you so much for the kind words!!! :)  I do my best to listen to what everyone has to say and even if I don't have the answer to a question i want each of you to know that i'm here for you for support and I think that's the important thing because support is something i had a hard time finding from people IRL!!!!  I hope that your lining is nice and thick next time you go in!!!  That would be wonderful!  I also hope that if this cycle doesn't work out then the new RE will be able to give you better answers. Nothing turns me off more than a doctor who can't take the time to explain anything to you or at least have their nurse explain it to where you'll understand it!!!  My RE was male and I LOVED him.  I know that i'm probably one of the only people who see things the way I see them but i feel like men are more open than women because in my area the female doctors seem to think they know it all with the "i've been there done that and i had no problems attitude" and let me tell ya...i can't STAND people who are like that!  If you've never had to worry about how long it's taking you to get pregnant then you'll NEVER understand what the women who do have a hard time go through!!!  My sister in laws NEVER have had problems getting pregnant and that's one thing that use to bother me all of the time was the fact that from the day that we got married (though we started TTC a few months before we got married) they were asking us when we were going to have a baby...and at first it didn't bother me so bad...but as the months turned into years it started bothering me...REALLY BAD and I started refusing to go around people who were just going to hound us about the issue instead of being understanding that we were having to go through what we were having to go through.  Then we had NO support from his family and half of my family when we started going to our RE and taking treatments.  Everyone was soooooo worried that we would end up like Kate and Jon or the Octo-mom and that's not even the case. Yes, multiples was a possibility, but my doctor wouldn't let us trigger the months i was over stimulated and told us very specifically NOT to DTD for at least 2 weeks after they started rupturing...they also kept me under close observation with u/s and b/w during those times (well all the time actually...i was afraid i wouldn't have any blood left by the end of it lol)   I really really wish that EVERY woman here could have the kind of insurance that I have and have a RE office like mine.  We only had to pay a $300 "escrow" at the very first appointment and after that I NEVER had to pay a co-pay and i was going like 2 to 3 times a week most weeks.  I was having b/w and u/s done every time i went in too. (i got REALLY familiar with THE WAND lol ha i guess you gotta keep humor when things always seem so BLAH!!!)  Then my medications were only $45 for each scrip. so i think TOTAL i only paid $300 for medication...and i still have like 2 or 3 boxes of menopur at the house!!!  It would be nice if every state would see IF as a TRUE medical problem and cover more of the stuff that goes with it.  I think that every couple deserves to have a child if they truely want one and want the responsiblity that comes with children!!!  ANYWAYS, i'll get off my high horse now lol.  I hope that you ladies are having a good day.  I'm at work 3 hours early because i'm nice and let one of my guy friends go home because he's sick as a dog and our sup. wouldn't get him off!! (for the 3rd day in a row!!!  though she's taken off 2 days and left early 3 days in the past week because she's "sick" though she can still spend time with her friends kids because she CHOSE not to have children...and it makes me mad that she does that when i do have 2 kids at home whom i'm NOT getting to see and my 3 1/2 month old is starting to distance herself from me because i'm not there and that hurts my heart!!! ) 

[brichole1214]

jenger:  I just had to post again to say thank you for sharing your blog with us!!! It's inspiring and really helps tell feelings that some people might be afraid to share.  (Granted with me DH tells me i need to stop sharing so much...but if i don't share i keep it bottled up and then eventually i explode and cry for hours on end!!!!)  Thank you again it was very touching and i hope that your journy to #2 is over with soon!!!!  I understand it taking a while for #2 and i sometimes think that Secondary IF is just as hard if not harder to deal with that primary IF.  I'm not saying  that women with primary IF don't suffer...because i see it every day in here and i feel for them.  but i don't know how they feel personally.  To know that I got pregnant with #1 while on BCPs almost makes me sick especially seeing how so many women here are suffering to even get pregnant with their first child!!!!  But to turn around and it take a total of 5 years to get pregnant after my first child was born and i started trying again when she was 2 it's hard to understand WHY!!!  To top it off i was only 21 when i started TTC again and it took me until i was 26 to FINALLY get pregnant again.  I know some women have to suffer longer than that...and my heart goes out to them.  I think i'm just rambling now...but i seem to still have so much built up inside of me from when I was on my TTC journy for #2 and I PRAY that my journy for #3 isn't as long as the last...though looking at my chart right now (granted i know my hours are all screwed up right now) if i don't get back on my daytime schedule it will take us another 5 years to get pregnant with our next child.

[blueyezz4]

Drive by posting real quick b/c I'm dead tired right now and need to go to bed.  Good luck to all and baby dust to everyone..

AFM & Brichole - my U/S was today and all went well.  I started a really low dose of Gonal F this evening for our FET cycle that we are doing probably at the end of this month.  Next U/S is next Wed.  We will see.

[Lega]

Hi everybody....I was really busy recently like most of you...I am happy for all of you who had to make hard decisions but dare to step one more little step towards the miracle we all hopping for...

I started testing on Wed, to bad still no luck,,,what if my body won't react to 100mg now even it did last month,,,scary,,,,and then I asked them why I can't try triger but they say am Ok with my LH,,but then again why I am on clomid if am ovulating on my own most of my cycles. And then I didn;t w 50mg clomid (last year I tried clomid 50mg: ovulated 1st cycle, didn't 2nd, got 100mg ovulated 1st with 100mg and then didn't 2nd with 100mg)...I feel lost,,,

Am working a lot of OT too, so I understand all of you who can't go to bed with DH and just enjoy homework,,,I get home at 11pm (and sometimes have to get up at 5:25AM), my DH 2am...thats why those 2 years of trying is so difficult,,,

Good luck to all of you,,,lucking forward to hear good news!

[renavoo]

Brichiole, thank you for being so open...I love listening to other people's experiences because it makes me feel like I'm not so alone. And by the way, I hate people who are not team players. I can't believe that your supervisor is so mean! I You're so great to have helped your friend though, especially considering your own schedule!

My lining is thin still. A bit above 5mm so I'm not feeling very confident. But the good news is that my doctor said that I have a triple stripe pattern which is a good thing. You know what annoys me? NOW, my RE says that if I don't get pregnant this round, she will give me estrogen next round. After two months of asking, FINALLY, she is stepping up to the plate. DH is too annoyed with her now though so we are still going to the other RE to see how that goes.

I was triggered today and I will get an IUI tomorrow. I have 2-3 follicles so that is good. I seem to be hyper reactive to Clomid because i got these results even on only the 50mg dose. Lega, I hope you get a positive soon! Haha I liked that we were on the same schedule. Don't get down. It will happen! We just have to be positive. I think if I say that enough, I will believe it myself. ;o)

Good luck Blueyezz!! I hope everything progresses as well as it has been! Hugs and baby dust to everyone!

[wtksblondie104]

Hi. I am brand new at this, and trying to find my way through all of the info that comes along with using a donor. I have a girlfriend of 7 years and I am 33, so we are going to finally try to do IUI. Im very nervous because I have polycistic syndrome (PCOS), and I have a brain tumor also which is a pituitary adenoma. ( I have had it ...for 10 yrs-maintained with meds, however it makes my body already think it's pregnant since it sits on the pituitary gland.) I also am borderline pre diabetic, with high blood pressure, and high cholesterol. But I am more motivated than you can ever imagine, and there is nothing I have wanted more than to have a baby of my own. I recently quit smoking, started a very strict diabetic diet, and exercising almost daily. I hope this works!  

[jenger]

Hiya Ladies-

Hope things are well with you all.

Thanks for liking my blog, ladies.  It's been really personal, and dark... In the month I have had it, I have not told anyone until I posted it on this thread, fearing that it was too dark.  But I actually think it's OK, like you said Bricole, it's good to get the really raw stuff out. 

I wrote a new post today for our friends - people who wanna talk with us about it, but don't know what to say.  Feel free to give me some more to add to it.

Rochelle - How's the clomid treating you?  (wait, I think you said you were on a road trip...) I was fine with 50mg, a mess, a complete mess on 100mg.  (And I am doing fine on 5mg of femara/letrozole!)

renavoo - so sorry about your lining, and your RE.  Good luck on your IUI tomorrow, lady.  I will be thinking of you.

bricole- I, like you, have thought a lot about primary vs. secondary IF.  And I have come to the conclusion that they both REALLY SUCK.  (Pretty astute, huh?) But really, one is not easier than the other. 

Good luck, blueyezz!!

AFM - Cd 10ish, high reading on monitor.  I think O will come early.  I am done with the letrozole/femara, and am doing a "natural cycle".  Tons of BD really soon.

[Lega]

Renavoo good luck to you,,,I will try do not stay behind a lot so maybe we could share our pregnancy problems later on ;)

[renavoo]

Hey Jenger, I really enjoy your blog. It's like it's speaking to what I feel too. I, too, feel like a failure sometimes and I've started avoiding situations where pregnant people are. I just found out that my other cousin's girlfriend is pregnant. So, that makes my two cousins and my SIL. Wonderful. Really makes me feel better. My DH has been wonderful and he's been so supportive but there are times that i still just kick myself. I'm 34 myself so I'm always thinking, "why didn't I start earlier?" Why didn't I stop taking birth control pills a few years ago? Why Why Why. It's my mantra now...

Oh well. I don't know what I would like people to say to me...honestly, I haven't told anyone about our troubles, except you ladies. This site is my salvation because I always feel better once I post something. However, no one in my group of friends and family know how difficult this is for me. One of my friends knows I am getting fertility treatments. Only once did I break down crying in front of someone (and I blame it a little on taking oral prometrium...that thing made me a mad woman! It's vaginal for me from now on!!). Otherwise, though, I kept/keep my feelings inside. That's why it feels so good to let it out on this site!

Jenger, good luck on your soon to be BD marathon! ;o) Hopefully, this will be the month!!

wtksblondie, Welcome!! I hope that you're successful. It seems like you're facing multiple potential issues but I always think that determination will win out. Have faith and definitely let us know how things proceed!

Lega, please tell your body to ovulate soon so we can be ovulation buddies. haha.

Off to get my IUI! Here we go again!!

[brichole1214]

Blueyezz: G/L!!! Thinking about you all the time!!!

Lega: I don't wanna freak you out but I never was able to respond to Clomid.  My OB tried me on it from Jan to Oct of 09 with no luck.  Then was refered to the RE and it took from Nov 09 to March 10 to get pregnant with the help from my RE. I tell you this because I don't want you to be too hard on yourself if it doesn't work for you...it really isn't made to help everyone and my RE told me that there's usually a different "combo" for everyone...since our bodies are completely different. 

renavoo:  Thank you again :)  I just don't see the point in hiding how I feel...so i appreciate you and the other ladies for listening to my honesty and not totally getting ticked off at me.  I think that all of us who suffer from IF, whether we've been trying for months or years, primary vs secondary, it doesn't matter....We all suffer and shouldn't have to hide those feelings and I hope everyone here feels they can share their feelings and not feel judged. AND hugs!!! I know it's not easy watching everyone else getting pregnant around you when you're trying so hard to accomplish something that probably didn't take them very long to do!  I hope that your IUI went well today!!! Thinking baby thoughts and sending out sticky vibes!!!

wtksblondie104:  Welcome!! I pray that your stay here is short but enjoy the friendships you will make along the way!!! :)  Le me know what you'd like your blurb to say and I'll get your info added to the first page.  I hope you can find the support you are looking for here!

jenger:  I agree...neither primary nor secondary IF is easy.  Especially when you have to watch women around you getting pregnant at the drop of a hat!  MY brother and SIL could just THINK about having another child and they would be pregnant right before my brother's V!!!!  Which i'm shocked that it's even taken and held for the year in a half that it's been since he had the procedure done!!! Two of their 3 children were born during the 5 years that I was TTC.  The thing that made me feel worse was the fact that when their middle daughter was 9 months old is when they got pregnant with their son so their kids are only 18 months apart...and I'm kinda jealous because even their oldest and youngest don't have as many years between them as my 2 do!!! I'm so GREEN just thinkin about it lol.  I cried forever though when they got pregnant with their son....like weeks and weeks...and what hurt worse is they waited like 3 or 4 months before they even told me because they didn't want to "hurt my feelings" because they knew i wanted another baby.  That was just a bigger blow than if they'd told me the day she got pregnant!!!

ANYWAYS, I really need to get to work...just wanna say that I am thinking about all of you ladies!!!!  I have been getting on my soap box a lot lately lol. ha

[Lega]

Renavoo I am telling that myself all day long :D

Brichole as I said, I tried Clomid before and it worked 50% of the times,,,I weight 130LB and will they put me on 150mg if 100mg wont work right now?? Am not worried, everything is like big mystery for me right now :) For some reason am thinking its not the question of procedures and treatments, its a question of time,,,I just have to be patient till that day will come.

You know what I didn't like the most - when last IUI didn't and people I know tried to say nice words to make me feel better,,,Its so annoying!!!

[Kaydove]

Hey, I don't have much time but I did want to update what my Naturalpath said about natural ways to increase lining. I'll list them off since I'm a list maker ;)

1) Daily baby aspirin (81 mg).

2) Traditional Medicinals Tea are awesome. Try either the Organic Raspberry Leaf http://tinyurl.com/4vs7kvj or Female Toner http://tinyurl.com/4m29a4p. I'm going to finish my box of the Female Toner this cycle, then switch to just the raspberry lead tea.

3) Daily cardio exercise - blah.

4) I asked her about FertileCM http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000GQSMOE and she said it won't interfere with fertility medication and its an interesting concept and to let her know what my experience is. I start Clo mid next cycle but started FertileCM yesterday to give it an extra month to work. I've read that people have really good experience with it! I'm not being monitored so I won't be able to give the mm of my lining, and I'm already have great amount of cervical fluid. I'll let you know if my cervical fluid changes or still stays good on my Clo mid cycle.

Write more later! And welcome to the newcomers!

[renavoo]

hehe kaydove, I laughed out loud when I read your comment about daily cardio exercise. Blah is a good term. Ugh is my second term. No is my final answer. hahah

[SimplyRochelle]

A very quick update post on me. I feel freaking amazing! I have been taking the Clomid at night, right before bed, and I have noticed that the later it gets the worse my headache gets, but I can deal with a semi-constant headache if it means I get to keep all this energy. I almost feel euphoric. We arrived in North Carolina late last night and I was up super early just ready, ready, ready to go! I am currently sitting a coffee shop that I found by wandering around town while everyone else is still asleep. I am so in love with this little town (Carrboro, NC). 

We didn't really think, oh yeah, we're going to be in the car when I possibly O since it's always so late in my cycle, not thinking about how Clomid would change that, so this baby may have to be conceived in the car in a state park somewhere along the way, but so be it.

I think I have a longer update in my blog, but yeah, feeling great and wondering if that means it's not working. I do feel hyper aware of my ovaries right now though so something is going on down there.

[jenger]

Yeah Rochelle!  I' glad it feels great - A road trip baby would be great!

Kaydove and renavoo, I am a cardio queen... If I got to work out every day (I did, four and a half years ago, pre kiddo) I would be thrilled.  It makes me feel good... It hasen't gotten me pregnant, however.

I got to hold a 6 week old last night.  It was lovely and hard all at the same time.  She got pregnant accidentally (Well, she wanted, her husband didn't) after I had bee trying for a year.  A real marker for me.  And while I loved holding her, it hurt to know that I have been wanting this for so long, and have not gotten a baby.

[Lega]

I saw Rapsberry leafs suplement,,,You think this would work? I can't take aspirin, it makes my nose bleed,,,,my blood is very thin,,,

 

I think Rochelle will have baby "hippy" style :)

 

Tomorrow I will schedulle ultrasound to find out whats going on,,,I feel 150mg of clomid is comming,,,

 

Today I broke down,,,in fact it was last night,,,I called out from work, today slept till 4pm, then went for a walk by the ocean, visit couple stores and rushed home thinking Desperate Housewifes is back on tonight,,,to bad it wasn't..Anyways, opened bottle of wine and just watched TV,,,DH come back from work and wasn't happy seing me with glass of wine but right now I feel like I don't care, just can't take it anymore,,,

[tantylynn]

Hey everyone! I've really enjoyed reading through all the posts recently. Yay for venting and getting things off our chests that we otherwise wouldn't be able to IRL.

I'm ready for my blurb to be updated, as DH and I returned to the dr today for our test results. I have PCOS, and apparently that is the culprit of us not being able to get PG. My dr has referred us to an OB for treatment and I'm just waiting to hear back from them as to when we can go in for our first appointment.

Weekend Wrap-Up
Name: Tantylynn
Age: 22
TTC #: 1
CD: 8
DPO (if applicable): N/A
Testing: N/A
Trying Since: May 2009
Plan for this Cycle: Keep up the charting (this is my first chart) and have some well-timed BD!
Link to Chart (if applicable): http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/tantylynn

[MountainMamaGC]

SQUEEE! I started spotting tonight at 7 DPO. Fingers crossed that this is a good sign.

[zanelee]

I'll squee with you Lydiah!!! Hope that it turns up with a BFP!!!!

:)