Have any of you experienced this? *long, sorry*

[NikonMama]

My son is 12 and in the 6th grade, still elementary.  He was born with a deformation of the inside of his right ear, so he is profoundly deaf in that ear (85%+).  It is a sensory-neural hearing loss so hearing aids will not help him.  The only thing that could help would be a cochlear implant, but with the other ear functioning perfectly fine, that is out of the question.  We didn't find out about his hearing loss until a routine screening in school when he was in 1st grade.  When he was born they didn't do hearing tests at birth like they do now (at least they didn't on him).  His ear on the outside on that side is slightly deformed also, but we never really noticed until his hearing specialist pointed it out.

Up until earlier this year he has had an IEP at school b/c he used an FM system at school (speaker on desk but the past two years he has had a ear piece in his good ear instead, teacher wears microphone).  In the earlier years the teachers would tell him to use it, and last year his teacher would use non verbal cues to remind him.  This year his teacher refused to help him or remind him at all and said he is old enough to remember on his own, even when we asked if she would mind doing so in his IEP meeting.  While I somewhat agree with her, he had ADD and is VERY scatterbrained and would forget his pants in the morning if we didn't remind him. 

Since she refused to remind him at all, it got to the point where he just wasn't using it at all.  He does still have preferential seating, though, which is good b/c we've had to fight a couple teachers about that even though it's in his IEP.  Anyway...we had another meeting at the beginning of this semester, and we (his teacher and his parents) decided that since he isn't using it anyway and seems to be doing okay enough without it, that we should just stop using it.  The Special Education Coordinator was totally against this, but went along with it b/c she was outnumbered. 

I'm on the side of the SEC, honestly, but I think that the majority of the reason that DS doesn't use the hearing piece is b/c he's embarrassed.  I think he's getting to the age where he's self-conscious about things like that.  On one hand I want to encourage him to keep using it, but on the other hand I don't want to push it and cause him to be embarrassed.  KMIM?  B/c he stopped using the system, he was moved down to a 504 plan rather than IEP.  He was kept on a 504 simply b/c of his preferential seating. 

In two weeks we are going to be moving to a different state, and a different school.  Do you think we should try to get him to use it again once we get down there and settled in the school?  His embarrassment started when he started using the ear piece rather than the speaker on his desk.  It was a new high tech thing they had just received and we were told it was VERY expensive.  The school we are moving to is a much smaller school (rural) and probably will not have the money for the ear piece so he will most likely have the speaker again, though we'd have to find out once we get down there.  Though...next year he will be starting "middle" school (it's a combo middle/high school so I'm not exactly sure how it works) and will probably have to cart the speaker and microphone from class to class, so I doubt he'll want to do that either. 

I'm just not sure if we should even bring it up, or just leave it.  What would you do?  The speaker/ear piece DOES work, b/c unless he is sitting in his seat all the time and his teacher stands in the same spot all the time, he can't hear her.  If the classroom gets loud, if they are in small groups and his bad ear is to the teacher, etc, etc, he can't hear.  His hearing specialist wants him to wean off of it anyway, b/c he says that he needs to learn to cope without it b/c he won't be able to cart a speaker around at work when he's an adult, etc. 

Does anyone have any advice?  Sorry, sometimes I babble and don't make much sense...so thank you SOOOOO much if you made it to this point!  :) 

 

[Linda on the move]

Originally Posted by NikonMama 

His hearing specialist wants him to wean off of it anyway, b/c he says that he needs to learn to cope without it b/c he won't be able to cart a speaker around at work when he's an adult, etc. 

I don't if I agree with the logic. I have minor hearing loss, and in some situations it's a problem (it would be in school with noises coming from different directions) but in most adults situations, it isn't that big of a deal. School really is a different set up than most work places.

My DD's sn are very different from your son's, but 12 was a tough year. That's when it really hit her that she was different. At 14, she's a lot more comfortable in her own skin. I would fall into the "what ever works for this year" camp. If he doesn't want to use a device and he's doing Ok, then there's no reason to go to war with him on it. On the other hand, I'd really watch how his school work goes and how he gets along with others and see if it keeps working. Whatever you decide to start with at the new school, I'd set up a review meeting for 2 months into the school year to talk about how it's really going.

My DD has processing speed issues (among other things) and her 504 in middle school included having all of her homework assignments written for her (or emailed to me). The teacher couldn't just say them because my DD couldn't pick up the details. Little things like that might help when he is learning to balance multiple teachers.