Thank you, Amy, I will look in to that as well.
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I wanted to give a quick update, because there have been a few things that have happened. We had to see his developmentalist for his 6 year check up. She mentioned that homeschooling would be a very bad idea for him, because he will probably develop a social anxiety if he is not in nearly constant contact with people. I'm unsure if it is as dire as all that, but we will continue until school ends in a few months at any rate. We are going to ask to change some of his special ed stuff in school to include fewer groups (really, putting a bunch of 5 year olds with behavior problems in the same room and telling them to play nice is just a bad idea), and more one on one work during the school day. We are also increasing his ABA, so I will be pulling him out of school probably about 15 hours a week anyway. They are going to love that. (sarcasm) We are also finally going ahead with seeing a neurologist, as she concurs that his behaviors seem off, even for an autistic kid.
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Another thing, we had open house at school, and going through his work was fascinating for my husband and I. One thing I noticed off the bat is how much he has improved overall, and I'm shocked they do not see that. Secondly, he is incredibly creative. Gifted, I would say, creatively. His pictures and stories, while a bit dark, are amazingly inventive. He has an ability of looking at things and doing things in a way that is stunningly intelligent, and should not be stifled. They are being too controlling and need to get off his back. The boy has talent. He is also riotously funny. In his journal he had to draw pictures of things that start with certain letters, like ghost for G. On "P" he drew a picture of a spider, because he is hearing "pider" instead of spider, and I have to say everyone cracked up. It's too cute. His stories are also extremely funny. Yes, his drawings and writing ability are probably the worst in the group. But, I think his creativity is outstanding. The writing skills will come with time. You can't teach inventiveness and creativity (IMO).
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Also, the boy is reading. I have no doubt now that he can read nearly everything. He read many things there. While at my oldest daughter's room they had a word puzzle of words that describe them, and she accidentally put his name right next to girl, so it looked like he was a girl, and he read it, and acted put out about it. However, if you ask him to read, he immediately shuts down. I wonder how to draw him out. after reading one word, he is bored and won't do another. Apparently ADD-like behaviors are very common in autistic kids, although it has been drummed in to me that it is NOT ADD, but autism. Whatever. It's still the same challenge - an inability to pay attention. I'm not sure how to go about lengthening this for him, but it does clue me in that asking him to read one word, and then moving on to something else for a while, might be the way to go. He also seems to have no idea when you ask him to read, what to do. He will point out words and read them, but I don't think he knows that that is what reading is. He seems lost when you ask him to read, just as if I asked him to pin point our location using a sextant. He has no idea what to do. And I'm unsure of how to teach him such an abstract concept.
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So, for now I am going to look in to these suggestions you have made, and probably try them all out and see what he responds to. We do a lot of academics at home anyway (my oldest is very gifted and enjoys education), so this will just be another part of our day, and I'll see if it helps him. I am also requesting a meeting with the school counselor, principle, and specials teachers to get all of my concerns straightened out. So far I have been very laid back and "whatever" about things because I really believe in allowing people, my kids included, find their own way through things. But they have not found their way, and now I have to go in and demand these accommodations they should have figured out by now. I hate doing that. But it is what it is, and that's the way you often have to get the system to work for kids when they are special needs. I always hope that things will just work out on their own. My kids seem smart enough to figure out what to do without me harping on them all the time; why are adults so different?
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I am, in general, feeling much more optimistic. I am still thinking that homeschool for a few years will only help him. He needs people around him to see all the good things about him and are willing to wait for him to outgrow the negatives. He's barely 6 for Pete's sake!