In your circle of friends/family - Page 2

[JulianneW]

In my family its 2 cut vs. 3 intact. My dad and BIL are cut (though BIL's mother deeply regrets it). My sister and BIL are now proud parents to my intact nephew and BIL even talks to other dads about keeping their sons intact. My husband and brother and intact.
 

Originally Posted by corrieoseal 

We will not circumcise our son. I know my nephew is circ'd (only boy on my side) and this baby I am pregnant with the first grandson on DH's side, so who knows what will happen there. I expect we'll get some pretty negative reactions from my family when they find out and DH's family is pretty opinionated so if they are against leaving him intact, I expect to hear about how bad our decision is (DH is circ'd.) I know my sister thinks it's wrong not to circ and my mom probably agrees so I am not discussing it with either of them. I was talking to a big group of friends about it a few months ago and was surprised that not one of their sons is intact, so I expect he'll be the only boy I know not circ'd. I'm only sad that I've gotten a few negative comments about our choice from friends. I have no desire to educate anyone or discus it at length, I was just hoping folks would either accept it or not care enough to comment negatively.

When people give negative comments the best response is (insert husbands name) is intact. They shut up real fast and never bring it up again. In my case its true but its not like the average person would know if it were or not. 

[minkajane]

I don't think there are any except DS. I don't remember from when my older cousins are little and I've never seen my younger cousins without diapers, but I can almost guarantee they're cut. I have hope for one of my cousins, because when I posted an article about the low circ rates from last year, his mom made a joke that didn't seem like my intactivism bothered her at all, so who knows. He's 13 now, so I don't have any way of knowing.

No one who has had a boy since I've been an intactivist has kept their sons intact, despite my best efforts. One girl even decided against it but the doctor talked her into it. Another said she was against circ, but her BF's mom died a few years ago and had both her boys cut, so they were going to have their first son circ'd in her honor, but she'd fight to keep others intact. All I can say is WTF on that one...

I've never seen another foreskin at the pool, at DS's daycare, or anywhere else. It doesn't help that I live in the midwest, but it's still very discouraging.

[drs0410]

My baby is the only boy I know of who isn't circumcised. My husband's step siblings have 3 boys all together. Two I know for sure are circumcised and the other one I don't know about. I have a 2 year old nephew, and I'm not sure if he's circumcised.

[erin23kate]

DS is the first grandchild on both sides, so we have a 100% intact rate in this generation.  :)

As for friends, it's about half-and-half.  My "crunchier" mama friends did not circ, my more mainstream ones did.  Half of the ones who did have talked about regretting it in some way; 3 of them had to have a son's "re-done" because of problems.  One friend has 2 circ'd boys and 1 intact because of the re-do.  She had to do all sorts of arcane things at diaper changes to keep the botched circ clean - and apparently that was one of the reasons she had him circ'd in the first place ("it's easier to clean", her pedi said).  When she learned that I didn't have to do a damn thing to clean DS's penis, she was absolutely furious with her doctors and became more vocal about the issue than I am.

I love the story about the pool above - if many of these moms doing it "so he wouldn't be teased" knew what the circ rates actually are, they would go the opposite direction completely.

[Super~Single~Mama]

Originally Posted by erin23kate 

DS is the first grandchild on both sides, so we have a 100% intact rate in this generation.  :)

Thats us too, DS is the only grandkid on both sides, and all of his aunts and uncles are pretty involved - all of them have done diapers at one time or another.  They all know that its no big deal (other than my ex's mom sometimes commenting that she doesn't remember what a circumcised penis looks like , although I haven't seen her in over a year so I don't know if she still says it), so I'm hoping that all their future kids stay intact.  My brothers are both intact, and I know my mom will kill them if they circ their babies - so I'm not too worried about them.

[hakunangovi]

Seven male grandchildren in our family - all intact except one who "had" to be circumcised at age 11.  That was before the internet and information to combat the arrogant urologist was non existant.  When DS was born it was about 50/50 amongst our friends.

[NavaNessa]

My DH and I are expecting our first, and while the gender is a surprise, if this sweet little one is a boy, he will remain intact.

At the beginning of my pregnancy, I was really feeling like the baby would be a girl, but as time went on, I started thinking we might be having a boy...around that same time, I started thinking about circumcision, and how I really, really did not want to have to "deal" with my baby going through that. My DH, and my 3 brothers are circumcised, and I assume my father is as well (actually, I'm sure, just based on my family, all of the males on both sides are circumcised). About that time, I came across a blog talking about circumcision vs. intact...so I started researching it, and then brought the subject up with my DH (about possibly leaving our son intact). He didn't like the idea at first, only because of the whole "what about the locker room and looking different thing". But then he started researching it on his own, and actually decided before I did that it wasn't something that was necessary (especially since there has been a rise in intact males).

My only hold back concerning whether we did it our not, was how to deal with the family "argument" that might ensue, seeing as how my family views it as a Biblical practice (yet again, I will be the quiet rebel, that no one ever suspects {having been raised in a conservative Christian/Messianic home, my nose piercing and tattoo were a little surprise} ).

Needless to say, my DH and I are in agreement that our sons will remain intact, and that we'll just have a bunch of research, as well as our own personal belief on the subject ready to go when it comes time to tell the family...in the end though, we always come back to the "agree-to-disagree" rule we've held in my family, and they've always respected the fact that the decisions I make are mine to make.

[vachi73]

Quote:

Originally Posted by NavaNessa 

My only hold back concerning whether we did it our not, was how to deal with the family "argument" that might ensue, seeing as how my family views it as a Biblical practice (yet again, I will be the quiet rebel, that no one ever suspects {having been raised in a conservative Christian/Messianic home, my nose piercing and tattoo were a little surprise} ).

If it helps you on this issue (esp with your family), circ is an OT mandate that is very specifically NOT required in the NT -- read Paul's letters (use a concordance and look up "circumcision" -- you'll see that the NT references are very specific that circ is NOT the way "in."

Religious discussions are not allowed on TCAC, so if you want to discuss further, PM me :) GL and best wishes for a H&H pregnancy/delivery/baby!

[minkajane]

I have good news - DS is no longer the only intact boy I know! I have a friend who is himself intact (born in Germany) and his ex-wife had their son cut against his wishes. His second son was born yesterday and he proudly informed me that they'd be keeping him intact! I'm glad I spoke to him, though, because he was under the impression that you had to retract the foreskin to clean under it. He doesn't remember a time when he wasn't retractable, so he didn't realize. And baby is breastfeeding beautifully, even though he was a bit early. I'm sure not having genital surgery helps with that!

[myfairbabies]

Out of mine and dh's nephews- 8 intact, 4 circ'd, 3 unknown (almost positive 2 are circ'd, no idea about the other, but he was born at home). If the parents could go back in time, than the circed number would be down to 1. Ages 1-10.

[PuppyFluffer]

Minkajane, that is so fabulous to know!

[an_aurora]

My mom had three sons, all circumcised.  She didn't have a choice or didn't know she had a choice; she never saw them intact :(

My mom has 15 grandkids, 7 of which are boys, three of which are intact (that I know of; the other two are late teens and I didn't ask :o ).  One brother circ'd his first but their second and third boys are intact.  

My IL's had four sons; all circumcised except for their preemie which didn't make it.  

They have three grandkids, one of which is a boy, and he is intact.  They have a grandbaby on the way (yay!) and I'm sure if it's a boy he will be circ'd. :(

[MsFortune]

I was at a family gathering (Midwest) last summer.  After swimming, the kids were naked on the beach.  My cousin's 4 YO streaked by and I got a peek.  I could not tell if he was circced or not.  He seemed...  in between.  I asked cousin's sister (also my cousin) if the kid was circced and she said that there was a problem with the circ and so he has significant scar tissue on his penis, and he will need some kind of reconstructive surgery when he is older.  I said that's a lot of bother for a penis that was just fine to begin with.  She said that not circcing was not even considered as an option.  She did not even consider his botched circ as avoidable - because OF COURSE you circ your kid.  

So I have not polled my family, but I'm pretty sure DS is the first and only non circced person in our family. 

In my area, I'd say is about half and half.  

[TyrantOfTheWeek]

I only have one nephew on my, DH has 3 nephews. All cut :(

[Arduinna]

We have very few boys in my circle of family and friends, the ones we do have are sadly circ'd. Although I know that if my BFF had had boys they would have been intact since her dh is and they are both pro intact, but they only had girls. I don't have any sons, but they would be intact if I did.

[MorgnsGrl]

I always feel a little weird talking about this because it seems so personal to discuss the details of family members' penises! (Penii?)

My DH is intact, as is our son. (DH's brothers and dad are also intact. FIL was born in an area of the country where there were many Scandinavian immigrants and this was normal there.) SIL and BIL's son is intact. My brother's beautiful son, who died of a terrible brain cancer almost 4 years ago, was also intact - although my brother was circumcised, he and his wife did the research and chose to leave darling nephew intact without input from me. I was so happy about that decision.

[Lisa1970]

I have no idea. But when I do mention leaving my son intact, I get treated like I have 5 heads. And why would I do such a horrible thing. Then again, that is how they act about the extended nursing, having a child in a car seat past 2 yrs old, and home schooling. So I am used to it by now.

[esg]

My son is the only one out of the whole family that isn't circ'd. We're the "odd" ones.

[CatholicBFMama]

My husband and both his brothers are circ'd--my MIL told me to just do it because it's just "easier". My father was circ'd and I'm sure his brother was, also. My brother and DH's nephew are both circ'd, as is my cousin...

I'm pretty sure our son is the only intact boy in our family. It's just something that's routinely done here. 

Edit: I'd actually never seen an intact penis in person until our son was born! Crazy.....

[tiddle]

I'm not sure about my dad (I'd guess so), my brother is, DH is. Both our boys are intact. We didn't have any real discussion about it... for DS1, the staff never mentioned it in the hospital and I didn't know much about it at the time so I left the decision up to DH under the "he has one, he can make the decision" line of thought. DH came to me a few days later and said "there's really no reason for him to be circumcised, is there?" I said nope and that was that. With DS2 we didn't even bother to discuss it.

Edit: I talked to my mom about it and the prevailing attitudes at the time my brother had it done were that it was better to be circed for hygiene, etc. While she didn't say so, I'm guessing that she probably wouldn't have it done today.