Hi Mamas - Family bed toddler, self-weaning signs?

[bellababy4us09]

I am not sure where to put this, but I'm in kind of a panic of sorts. My DD nurses 2x day - nap and before bed. (Sometimes for comfort or tired - but rare.) This week we have started reading books in bed (family bed) before sleep - instead in the living room. She has fallen asleep three nights in a row without nursing. Ugh. I'm not ready for her to wean! It makes me a little sad really. She still nurses for nap. 

My questions are this; does weaning happen that fast? Do they stop one then another and then all together? What are the signs they are self- weaning? Is it bad psychologically to encourage her to nurse if she really wants to stop? What were/are your experienced with this?

The bottom line is that I want what's best for her. If she's telling me, then that is what it will be. I know it is selfish to say that I am not ready, but I would feel better if it was not a surprise and knew it was coming. It is such a sacred and special time for us and it has been DIFFICULT at times, and takes huge commitment but I wouldn't change it for the world.

Supportive mamas only need to respond.

[PatioGardener]

How old is your little one?

[bellababy4us09]

She is 23 months today! :)

[PatioGardener]

I asked about age because I feel that nursing until at least 24 months is important for baby's and mama's health. For that reason, if I were in that situation I would offer more often - especially at  night time as she was nursing then before.

We offer many things to our kids without worrying about the psychological impact. Veggies, for example! I feel it is my job to offer my child healthy options. You definitely can't force a kid to nurse, so I wouldn't worry about that! So my advice is to go ahead and keep offering

[Tamera]

My situation is different, but that's basically how my daughter weaned herself. She is only 17 months old, but my milk recently changed to colostrum (I'm 20 weeks pregnant) and I think she was frustrated and lost interest. She went a full 36 hours without asking to nurse, nursed for a few minutes during the day, and has fallen asleep without nursing for about the past week. She did ask to nurse yesterday, but I think it was mainly for comfort because she has a diaper rash.

I don't think I'm very qualified to answer your questions! This is my first experience with child led weaning. I agree with the PP that you can't force a child to nurse (especially a toddler!) so I can't imagine that it would be damaging.

[TiredX2]

Since you've posted this in the Child-Led Weaning forum, I'm assuming your goal is child led weaning.  If it's not (or if it is, lol) first let me say CONGRATS! to making it this long nursing.  It is really one of the very best things you can do for your child.

If you are wanting to CLW, you might want to change a few things.  First, why is your DD only nursing twice a day?  At that age, don't ask/don't tell is still very much a weaning technique.  If you want her to wean, easily, that is a great technique.  If you want her to nurse long enough to make the weaning choice on her own, you should probably be offering more often. 

If you don't *mind* nursing (or want to) I would really encourage you to offer several times during the day (at least).  Make a time for it and make sure she always knows she can.  For many kids, if you offer a different activity they really interpret it as saying they *can't* do the first activity (I found this several times with my own kids--- I thought they were just not choosing to nurse, they felt like I was telling them "no" by having a different activity in place).

Good luck!