DD1 has two winter jackets, a purple one, and a lavender and white one. She vastly prefers the purple one. She hasn't been able to explain why-- the two are nearly identical in their basic style and fit. She just likes it better.
Anyway, recently the zipper broke. It's a total loss-- I tried to take it out and replace it, but the way the seams are, I would have to take the whole thing apart, which for a $35 jacket isn't worth it, especially with only about a month left of cold weather where we live. She's been wearing it unzipped, or zipping it up as far as it goes, and then wearing a big wide scarf to "keep my belly warm," as she says. FWIW, it's not all that cold here-- around 45 to 50F during the parts of the day when she's out, and often much warmer, so she's in no danger of freezing!
So I got out the other jacket, which has hardly ever been worn, made sure it was clean, and suggested to her that she wear it. She refused. Persistently, over days and days, she refused to wear it. So I let it go. I'm a big one to choose my battles, ya know? Not my business, really, what coat she wears-- that was what I figured. My job was to make sure she has a warm jacket, which she does.
Anyway, I guess the teacher at school noticed the broken jacket. She didn't call or email or anything, but on Monday, DD came home from school with a new jacket on, and a form letter from the PTO telling me that the school has a program to provide things like coats and hats for families that might be in need, and please accept this gift from us, etc. Basically, they figured I couldn't provide a replacement jacket, and gave her one from their charity program.
I was mortified. Well, not really-- if I really was in need, I wouldn't be too proud to accept help that was offered kindly. But we are not in need! I mean, we're not rolling in the money, by any means, but we have enough to provide our kids with decent clothes. The kid HAS a coat. Two, in fact.
So I sent the coat back, with a nice letter thanking them for their concern, but assuring them that we were alright, and that they could keep their coat. But DD still refuses to wear the good jacket, and I can't imagine what they think of me at the school. The only way I'm going to get the other jacket on her is if I decide to step up to the plate and force the issue, and I hate to do that. I've always made it a policy not to get involved in power struggles over things like this.
What would you do? Would you make her wear the stupid coat?
Anyway, recently the zipper broke. It's a total loss-- I tried to take it out and replace it, but the way the seams are, I would have to take the whole thing apart, which for a $35 jacket isn't worth it, especially with only about a month left of cold weather where we live. She's been wearing it unzipped, or zipping it up as far as it goes, and then wearing a big wide scarf to "keep my belly warm," as she says. FWIW, it's not all that cold here-- around 45 to 50F during the parts of the day when she's out, and often much warmer, so she's in no danger of freezing!
So I got out the other jacket, which has hardly ever been worn, made sure it was clean, and suggested to her that she wear it. She refused. Persistently, over days and days, she refused to wear it. So I let it go. I'm a big one to choose my battles, ya know? Not my business, really, what coat she wears-- that was what I figured. My job was to make sure she has a warm jacket, which she does.
Anyway, I guess the teacher at school noticed the broken jacket. She didn't call or email or anything, but on Monday, DD came home from school with a new jacket on, and a form letter from the PTO telling me that the school has a program to provide things like coats and hats for families that might be in need, and please accept this gift from us, etc. Basically, they figured I couldn't provide a replacement jacket, and gave her one from their charity program.
I was mortified. Well, not really-- if I really was in need, I wouldn't be too proud to accept help that was offered kindly. But we are not in need! I mean, we're not rolling in the money, by any means, but we have enough to provide our kids with decent clothes. The kid HAS a coat. Two, in fact.
So I sent the coat back, with a nice letter thanking them for their concern, but assuring them that we were alright, and that they could keep their coat. But DD still refuses to wear the good jacket, and I can't imagine what they think of me at the school. The only way I'm going to get the other jacket on her is if I decide to step up to the plate and force the issue, and I hate to do that. I've always made it a policy not to get involved in power struggles over things like this.
What would you do? Would you make her wear the stupid coat?
