So my husband and I were having a conversation last night about the possibility of adding another child to our family (we currently have 1 boy and 1 girl aged 2.5 years and 8 months) and we (me especially) are having a hard time deciding whether or not to do it.
My husband is very much against adding a 3rd because he is concerned about the lack of QUALITY time we already have to spend with each of our 2 kids, let alone, the lack of QUALITY time we have to spend with each other (Currently this is almost nothing), and completely ignoring the fact that we each have ZERO time for ourselves.
I am thinking that this lack of time thing will change as the current 2 kids get older and more self sufficient, but my husband thinks it is just the opposite and they will become more demanding on our time and want to interact and spend more time together.
My husbands concerns are simple. He would much rather raise 2 kids and give them everything, more time, more attention, more love, more everything, than to split that into 3. Logically speaking, less is more. The fewer kids you have the more you can focus on them. Not only that, the more you have the time and energy to focus on your marriage, and on yourself, so you can be happier overall. His biggest worry is burning out not just himself, but the marriage, in the efforts to try and cater to a larger family. It sounds silly, but after just going through 2 kids and seeing how time intesive it can be, I know where he is coming from.
My main reason for even bringing up the 3rd is that it will be good for the other 2 by giving them another playmate and it would add more love in the family. I really don't have any other reason than that. My husband is thinking logically, I am thinking emotionally.
We are both stay are home parents (my husband works from home but it doesn't make too much of a difference because when he is working there is not much time for anything else) and we will be Home schooling the kids as they come of age.
Please let us know your thoughts on this, especially if you have 2 kids, have thought of 3 and either took the plunge or decided not too. How was your life/schedule, how did it affect your marriage, and then time you have. Does it get easier as the kids get older, or is it pretty much non-top craziness till they move out?
Thank you again.