In my good moments, I get that people aren't talking to me, they're talking to themselves. That realization makes it a bit more bearable. But I agree that it's the acquaintances who really rub me the wrong way. I posted this as my facebook status yesterday:
and got a lot of "you're beautiful!" responses, which was cute :)
Yeah, I posted a belly pic on facebook and everyone immediately came back with "OMG, look at how big you are!" yes, thank you very much. Not one person said anything nice! Last time I post a pic like that on FB - learned my lesson!
Aww! 
Have people seriously still not got the memo about not commenting on size? A simple "Cute belly!" would suffice.
I don't mind the pregnancy chit-chat at all. The only thing that bothers me is fat comments and personal questions, especially: "We're you trying?". That one has always skeeved me out a bit, even from close friends. Do people really need to know about our sex life?
I second all of this! well... except for the just now getting huge thing---i've been that way since the day I found out almost! eeeh... everyone likes to comment on how we have one of each now---really? that's great, bc we were hoping for another girl.... I wish I could say this to people!
I've JUST started to get comments about my tummy being big (or, according to one woman today, "fat"). I don't think I've suddenly gotten huge; I show late and tend to measure small (long torso, thinnish), so I've only just started wearing maternity tops, which emphasise the tummy. On days when I wear my non-maternity shirts I look a lot smaller. So I think it's just a perception thing.
Unfortunately I'm not too keen on personal remarks at the best of times, and during pregnancy I can get downright antisocial; so it grates on me when people comment. I still get people asking what sex the baby is, too, which we've known for months (well, nearly two months, anyway!), and the reactions to that annoy me too. There are the people who Approve of Boys, which I find obnoxious because I'm one of six girls; and of course the "now you've got one of each, how perfect!" comments, which always make me want to retort that we were hoping for another girl. I don't mind talking pregnancy ad nauseum with my friends, but acquaintances are the death of me. I have a friend who holed up for several months before she had her baby, and still hasn't come back into society several weeks after he was born... I know how she feels!
OMG I love that Facebook post and am totally going to steal it if you don't mind.
Generally I'm just amused by the varying responses pregnant women get. I've gotten the 'you are only xx weeks along? -- you are really showing!' remarks on the same day that I've gotten the 'No way! You hardly even look pregnant!' remarks...
.
I will say that since this is my second kiddo that things aren't so well contained this time around which I am actually very happy about. With #1 I was well into the third trimester before I got over the awkward--maybe she's pregnant or maybe she just gains all her weight in the tummy--period. I love being pregnant and think pregnant women are so beautiful!
steal away. it's a PSA that needs to be spread far and wide, sounds like :)
and of course the "now you've got one of each, how perfect!" comments, which always make me want to retort that we were hoping for another girl
Yeah, this assumption bothers me too... it's hell hearing it as a mother who lost a child. I had a little girl, had my son die, and then had a second son some time later. Hearing all these people saying, "How perfect! Now you have a pefect family with one of each!" was heartbreaking. My family would have been 'perfect' at that time with my TWO boys and one girl, screw your norms! (forgive the bad language)
It's funny for me to see people that I haven't seen in a while because they all say that I "finally" look pregnant. And now I have people rubbing my belly, which I like as long as I know the person who is doing it. :)
I must look actually pregnant now because total strangers are starting to ask how far along I am. I much prefer that to the wondering looks of people who want to ask but are afraid to say anything in case I'm just fat. lol
Oh yikes... I hadn't even thought of that. That's awful. :(
I get a lot of "wow, only three months until your due date?" "Where are you hiding him?", etc. I don't mind too much, especially this time around. I know this is just how I carry babies. I'm tall with a long waist and there is lots of room to spread out in there 
I still see people eyeing me uncertainly, though. I have become very familiar with the "Is she pregnant, or just gaining weight?" look.
Almost no one comments on my pregnancy. I figure I either look busy or grumpy or busily grumpy. I'm so grateful! This is my 6th so I've take my share of listening to HOW GIGANTIC I AM in the past and I haven't had to many endure comments about the sex of my children and how they fit into the ideals of strangers since my 1st daughter was born. Last night a man told me "you need to stop having babies" and well, I handled it with all the grace I could. Just make my burrito, fool. Mostly I get comments on the atrocity of having so many children.
Yesterday in a san of a half hour two cashiers commented on my belly. One asked, "Due any day", umm no, June. The other said something about not being pregnant in the summer. I said well I am due in June. She then proclaimed I was to have a big baby. I claim it was the dress I had on, but really I am big and so what, LOL.
I somehow manage to end up on both extremes. I've had multiple people at work tell me that I'm really small for how far along I am, and that I only look a couple of months pregnant. And then I've had others that are convinced I'm having twins. If I hear another person insist that I'll be giving birth in April or May because "that's when you're really due, your doctors must be wrong", I am going to smack them. I had one "friend" (I use that term loosly because she annoys the crap out of me) argue with me for half an hour that THREE ultrasounds (5weeks, 12weeks, and 20weeks, which all gave the exact same duedate) are all wrong, my midwife is wrong, everything is wrong, and I'm actually due early May and the baby will be born big even then. WTF. It's not like I'm a whale. I'm actually much smaller this time than I was with my other kids.
Screw off, random people, and stop infuriating me by making stupid comments about my size! Grr.
I went to the yarn store yesterday and I don't really like the staff at this particular yarn store because they have a history of breathing down my neck and/or interrogating me about stuff, when I just want to pet the yarn in peace. I don't mind discussing my pregnancy with even casual acquaintances but I didn't want these strangers to start asking me a zillion questions, so I wore a big hoodie and succeeded in not looking pregnant enough to get comments on it. Score!
I went to the yarn store yesterday and I don't really like the staff at this particular yarn store because they have a history of breathing down my neck and/or interrogating me about stuff, when I just want to pet the yarn in peace. I don't mind discussing my pregnancy with even casual acquaintances but I didn't want these strangers to start asking me a zillion questions, so I wore a big hoodie and succeeded in not looking pregnant enough to get comments on it. Score!
LOL! I've discovered that if I wear a hoodie I don't really look pregnant either.
My kids play baseball (boy) and softball (girl) and one of the other moms is always asking me when my baby is due. I tell her at least once a week. And when I tell her "mid-June" she looks at my belly with this kind of strange, half-cocked expression like she's not sure I'm telling the truth. And I can't tell if that look is because she thinks I'm too small or too big for how far along I am. I've decided that she thinks I'm too small, mostly because it makes me feel better to think that. lol. And because I can still fit in a lot of my pre-pregnancy clothes, which is only possible because I was bigger to begin with and then I shrunk.
That drove me NUTS last pregnancy... again, people at church. Every week: "So when are you due?" THE SAME AS LAST WEEK, LADY! It doesn't shift around! I could understand if they said "How many weeks along are you now?", because that number changes and I don't expect people to keep count. But if you care enough to ask every week when my EDD is, wouldn't you care enough to remember?
Although, maybe they got sick of me saying "Late March" and were trying to trick me into giving a more specific date. :p Either way, it was annoying.
This time I've started being proactive. When MIL said "Ooh, you're getting big!" last time I smiled and said wryly "Yes, so I get told six times a week at church", which led into a nice cosy discussion on the tactlessness of Other People. Hopefully I've managed to make her aware that I don't enjoy comments, without offending her - with any luck she'll think she's doing me a favour by giving me a break from all the comments Other People make. But we'll see. :p
Originally Posted by ~Nikki~
I've had multiple people at work tell me that I'm really small for how far along I am, and that I only look a couple of months pregnant. And then I've had others that are convinced I'm having twins.
Last night I had one person tell me that I looked really huge given how far along I was, and then right after that another person told me I was carrying very small. I think of the two of them, the second person is actually right. It's just funny how everybody has these very specific opinions.
Since I started this thread, I seem to have crossed some invisible line in the sand and everybody comments on my pregnancy now! While they didn't even a couple of weeks ago. I don't think I'm that much bigger but maybe I just got to the right level of bigness.
That drove me NUTS last pregnancy... again, people at church. Every week: "So when are you due?" THE SAME AS LAST WEEK, LADY! It doesn't shift around! I could understand if they said "How many weeks along are you now?", because that number changes and I don't expect people to keep count. But if you care enough to ask every week when my EDD is, wouldn't you care enough to remember?
It's made even worse by the fact that I see her 3 times a week! You'd think that someone I saw 5 days a week during football season, who knew I was pregnant then, who is on my Facebook where I have weekly updates, and who now sees me 3 times a week during baseball practice would be able to remember "June". Ugh. People can be so irritating.
I had an emotional breakdown today after my dad mentioned to me the comments that my step mom made about seeing a picture of my belly. Normally these things don't get to me, but I think the exhaustion is really kicking in. Just the other day she called and wanted to "give advice" that I shouldn't plan DD's birthday party 2 weeks before the babe's due date. <---really? why do you care? I get extremely frustrated that she has an opinion about EVERYTHING and usually it is very antequainted and well... the opposite from mine. Well she decided to tell my dad to tell me that I was really "big" and this baby was going to be huge and there is no way that I can have him naturally bc he must be coming early. Really?? bc I'm actually measuring small... I'm weighing less at this point than I was with DD and the last time I checked it wasn't ok to tell a pregnant woman that she is huge! My poor Dad felt terrible for telling me and apologized after he heard the tone of my response "Actually I'm measuring small, my belly just looks larger on my small frame..."
Normally this never bothers me! I am so used to hearing her "advice" on everything from pregnancy to how I should wash my dishes. But for some reason it really made me angry today. SO ANNOYING!
MaryElizabeth: Ugh. That sounds REALLY annoying!
I've been wearing a black cloak recently in lieu of a dressing gown (it's actually a Darth Vader cloak my mum made for me when I was a teenager!), and noticed today that I can fake being un-pregnant in it. :p (Think Avery wearing the Harry Potter cloak in 30 Rock...) Sadly, I'm too staid and matronly these days to wear a Darth Vader cloak out of the house. I used to wear it to swordfighting classes... one time I had my hair down (it was sittable-on-length) and a passing small girl said "Look Mummy, a witch!". Those were the days...
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