Pregnancy/Tandem Nursing

[Doodler]

We have been talking about TTC in a few months (not before he is 18 months).   I am just a tad hesitant...

Oliver is 16 months and still heavily relies on nursing for nutrition.   He is getting better about eating solids...but still, he nurses a LOT.

I am just really worried about how pregnancy will impact our nursing relationship.  I don't want him to be "forced" into weaning early.   I nursed my daughter until she was just under three and would be REALLY bummed if he weaned prior to two...I would really like to go longer than two and don't see it being an issue...I just worry that pregnancy would make that tricky.  

First, I worry about supply issues.   Is there anything I can do to keep my supply from tanking early on...and, at what point should I expect to "dry" up?  What about the taste?  

I talked with one friend today and she made me feel a little better, pointing out that it is a great way to gradually wean and if he doesn't wean, we will just Tandem nurse (which is what I would hope for) but I have another friend who said her supply completely tanked when she was a little over a month pregnant.  Her daughter "dry nursed" the rest of her pregnancy.  

Am I crazy to be worrying about this?  Am I making a bigger deal about something than I should be? 

I just feel like Oliver, not only for nutritional reasons, but for emotional reasons, is just not ready to wean.  

Maybe I am over thinking this...

[zonapellucida]

HMM first I ended up pregnant a bit earlier in my longest nursing relationship.  Ella was 14 months and over the period of 9 weeks my supply and extreme nipple tenderness necessitated stopping.   I fed her again after I delivered and she fell right back into it.  To keep a supply i always recommend Fenugreek.  If you take the capsules take enough so you smell like maple syrup.  Copious milk supply results.

[Peony]

Fenugreek is a uterine stimulant and should not be used during pg. There is one blend safe for use during pg, I think it is More Milk Two or something similar. I hear mixed results on it, personally it did nothing for me. Most of the supply boosting tips do not work during pg, milk production is at the mercy of pg homrones then and not too much you can do about it. As far as when you should expect a decrease, it could be instant or gradual. Most women do notice a dip around 20 weeks if they haven't noticed anything previously. A small amount will make it through without noticing anything, this isn't for the majority though. Taste does change. 

I don't think you are over thinking it. I always think alot about my nursling when taking into account when to get pg again. This pg I'm on currently was the one that happened the soonest, DS was 18 months when I got pg. My milk was gone by 2 months or so, he has handled it well. Better then my last child who was 21 months when I got pg and did not handle it well. Still nursing though I do limit the length due to the pain. This is the 3rd pg I've nursed through, they have all vastly decreased the amount they nursed while I was pg but never weaned. It is all very gradual, a pg did always set my children on the path to weaning, they did continue to nurse between 2-6 months after baby was born, but considering they were all avid nursers until I did get pg.... yes it helped it along. I still consider it child led, I never said no but once there wasn't any milk, the interest did decrease some. 

[Doodler]

Originally Posted by Peony 

Fenugreek is a uterine stimulant and should not be used during pg. There is one blend safe for use during pg, I think it is More Milk Two or something similar. I hear mixed results on it, personally it did nothing for me. Most of the supply boosting tips do not work during pg, milk production is at the mercy of pg homrones then and not too much you can do about it. As far as when you should expect a decrease, it could be instant or gradual. Most women do notice a dip around 20 weeks if they haven't noticed anything previously. A small amount will make it through without noticing anything, this isn't for the majority though. Taste does change. 

I don't think you are over thinking it. I always think alot about my nursling when taking into account when to get pg again. This pg I'm on currently was the one that happened the soonest, DS was 18 months when I got pg. My milk was gone by 2 months or so, he has handled it well. Better then my last child who was 21 months when I got pg and did not handle it well. Still nursing though I do limit the length due to the pain. This is the 3rd pg I've nursed through, they have all vastly decreased the amount they nursed while I was pg but never weaned. It is all very gradual, a pg did always set my children on the path to weaning, they did continue to nurse between 2-6 months after baby was born, but considering they were all avid nursers until I did get pg.... yes it helped it along. I still consider it child led, I never said no but once there wasn't any milk, the interest did decrease some. 

Thanks for this!  I feel better about my thought process now.

I would still consider it child led, I just don't want to "rush" the process.   If he was two, I would feel a little differently.   I would not have a problem waiting until he turned two either, but with an upcoming deployment...the two year old mark is bad timing and I don't want to wait LONGER than that.   Just knowing Oliver, I think he might be more like your child who was 21 months when you got pregnant.   I really worry he would not handle it well.  Maybe he would handle it better at somewhere between 18-24 months...and who knows, maybe I will feel differently in a couple months.  

[Peony]

Originally Posted by Doodler 

Thanks for this!  I feel better about my thought process now.

I would still consider it child led, I just don't want to "rush" the process.   If he was two, I would feel a little differently.   I would not have a problem waiting until he turned two either, but with an upcoming deployment...the two year old mark is bad timing and I don't want to wait LONGER than that.   Just knowing Oliver, I think he might be more like your child who was 21 months when you got pregnant.   I really worry he would not handle it well.  Maybe he would handle it better at somewhere between 18-24 months...and who knows, maybe I will feel differently in a couple months.  

My DD2 was the one that didn't handle it well, but then, emotionally, she actually did fine with it. It was at the exact same time my milk dried up that she decided to stop eating most solid foods after she had been eating them fine for a while. I tried all sorts of stuff, she wouldn't eat or drink much, needless to say she ended up losing 5 lbs in a little over a month and she wasn't a big girl to begin with. It took a lot of work, serious effort, and 6 months to get her to gain the weight back. I very slowly worked on getting her not to nurse to sleep during that pg, all because nursing was so painful I couldn't tolerate it for that length of time. I held her hand to go to sleep while snuggling which is something she still insists on doing 2.5 years later! Just things combined, lead me to later believe that the switch was harder on her then I had previously assumed it would. She is a highly sensitive child though. 

Honestly, I wouldn't of changed much looking back. She wasn't a baby, I need/want my children to nurse to at least age 2, and then they can decide when to stop. And while yes ideally maybe if I could spend 20 years having babies, I could space then all 4-5 years apart so the could nurse as along as they wanted with no disruptions. But such is not life! I could space them farther apart, but 4 in 8.5 years isn't really close spacing either. They are free to nurse long after a pg and during it with some limits. You just can't always predict how they are going to react to anything so I take what I am comfortable with, say getting pg with a toddler close to 2 (this last pg happened sooner then expected obviously) and go with it with minimal expectations. 

[Chloe'sMama]

I nursed through the pregnancy with DD2 and it was fine.  DD1 is still nursing and it has been 6 months tandem.

That being said.... I was one that my milk supply tanked even before I got my BFP.  It was pretty much gone by 5 or so weeks.  DD1 continued to nurse without much fuss, although she night-weaned herself by 5 months.  

I tried all the suppliments and nothing worked for me.  Doesn't mean they don't work though.  SIL had milk until she weaned her son at 6ish months pregnant.