My son's father is angry at both our nearly 16 mo toddler son -and me-for him not being able to put him to sleep.
I am pg w/ number two, and 12 weeks today, so unplanned/surprise # 2 will be here in Sep.
Son is slowly weaning himself, he nurses at night and naps (he naps once a day; the father was really pushing to knock out the second nap).
When #1 -son was a infant, a week old, the father threw fits at being woken up;slamming doors, yelling at us and huffing and puffing, and making the situation already bad truly unbearable. So, I have taken over sleeping duties-all of them-since then. Our son co-sleeps with me,and his father .
On account of that-and i never prevented the father from helping w/ night duties, baby seems better with me putting him to sleep/nursing him to sleep.
His father blames me and -like tonight-gets angry with the baby/toddler when he cries, which of course, makes it impossible for him to put him to sleep.He blames me for nursing him, and seems resentful and always talks about " we should have done this earlier" -like ti can be changed now!!!
Due to his fathers behavior, he slept in the other room from us for a while in his own bed so *his* sleep would not be disturbed while I stayed up all night doing night duties so father could go to work ( I bring in a small income from my savings, so ...) . Eventually, he moved back into our main bedroom
I bought lo a pacifier, got him a sleep giraffe and a turtle ( our night light went out). And I nurse lo in a rocking office chair in a dark room listening to white noise. Father comes in to take over repeatedly, he puts him down. Then, when baby cries, I can hear baby freaking out cause his father is getting impatient-after only a few minutes!!!
So, father sulks off, gets angry , ruins an otherwise good day yet again, (and I know he is blaming me for "not doing it sooner/).And goes to sleep downstairs.
When the new baby comes, honestly, yes it will be stressful.But the real thing I fear now is not the stress of two babies, but the hostility of the father!!! I can't TAKE IT anymore!!!
What can I do , what can we do, to get our toddler to sleep with his father?
this has become a very serious ; please advise, any non-CIO would help