I dont think she is inconsiderate.
Honestly, I suffered from a tick borne illness and talked to my Dr (and girls pediatrician). The small exposure to 'tick meds' we use for our pets are much less risky than exposure to the tick-bourne illness that are out there and very very prevalent this time of year. I have long lasting permanant nerve & joint damage from it, so I do not take tick illness lightly. We sprayed both our house and our pets. After we treat our pets, we simply keep them confined until the treatment is dried/absorbed.
I did consult with the spray company and they used a bio-healthier option around the house. We kept our kids away from the edges of the house, and also kept them off the grass/areas around the spray for a week post spray.
Spiders are also a serious problem where we live, so we use a natural product to keep them to a minimum.
As for the bleach-- simply bring some cleaners you are OK with (maybe sent them ahead of time??? so she can use them before you visit) and use those to clean up. We use natural products and explain to inlaws/family that it helps DDs asthma and also reduces excema. They are good with it.
BUT that said- lots of friends/family/ PUBLIC locations are chemically sprayed for bugs/ticks/spiders and cleaned with much harsher chemicals that people use in their houses. Almost all stores, mall, resturaunt, playground, even campgrounds will spray for bugs to help alleviate problems with weeds breaking up pavement, bugs in the kitchens, spider webs, ticks, in stores, etc.
I would not expect to close us up in our house or not go in public. Our area even sprays local parks for mosquitoes. They did a lot of research and thought there was some outcry-- the HIGH incidence of mosquito related illnesses (and some kids getting really sick from mosquito bites) and the resulting public cost/ long term health implications the parks are sprayed monthly from spring to fall. YUCK! But it is what it is, we try to avoid the parks post spraying, but otherwise use them often.
I see your point, but I would use reasonable precautions and visit.
It means a lot to your family and is something you can not 'go back' and recapture the moments. Have a blanket for your DS to sit on (or chair)when he is outside. Wash hands frequently, bath nightly, tick checks, natural bug sprays, etc.
Edited by KCMichigan - 3/18/11 at 9:34am