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The BSL Graduate/Stalking Thread - SPRING Edition - HOORAY, SPRING!!! - Page 4

post #61 of 230
Originally Posted by Jane View Post

Just keep taking it.  Most of the tests are DNA tests anyway.  No aspirin can screw those up.  They are super expensive though.  Typically, unless you've got family members with early death from stroke or history of blood clots, they don't usually find anything.  Because you've had babies before, any of the immune things are more likely than clotting issues.  You can't test immune things in pregnancy, or for a while afterwards.  You get false positives from the natural immune changes of pregnancy.  I'd suggest thyroid + general pregnancy labs.  HCG tests (2) to check doubling.  If you haven't got doubling, it's really to late to rescue.  I'm sure skeptical about progesterone, as I think, for the vast majority of women, the progesterone is low B/C the pregnancy is failing, not it's failing b/c progesterone is low.  Ultrasound isn't usually recommended til 6 weeks, unless you've got risk factors for ectopic.  You've got a LONG two weeks ahead of you.  I'm sorry.  The good news is, even after many losses, you still have a 60% chance of having a baby!  A real baby to join your family, no matter what you do or don't do. 

Thank you for all of the info, Jane. If it is an immune thing, and they can't diagnose during pregnancy, will they treat me somehow in the meantime just on the off chance that that's the problem? One of my coworkers just had her rainbow baby after like 4 losses, and they had her on steroids and blood thinners even though they had never found any official cause for her m/cs. Wow, this will be the worse TWW ever, even more so b/c two of my three losses happened between four and seven weeks. But I've made it another day, so that's something.
Originally Posted by Tear78 View Post

ahh, I get busy for a couple days and things get busy here! lavatea, YAY!!!! joy.gifcarrot.gifbroc1.gif Keep growing healthy, baby! goodvibes.gif Check out the first page and then let me know what you want it to say for you.

I think I'll address this after the appointment Wednesday, if you don't mind. I just need this to feel a little more real first, I guess.
Originally Posted by miriam_bat_avraham View Post

095 personal info removed.jpg




Two beautiful little perfect babies with two strong heartbeats (both at exactly 142)! They said they want the heartbeat to be between 120 and 180 at 8 weeks, and at least 115 at 7 weeks, so here I am with my awesome strong little embies pumping away well above average! Baby A measured 6w5d and Baby B measured 7w exactly. So cute!!!





Lavatea, I'm so excited for you to join us!!! AHHH!!!

MBA!! TWO babies! That's so awesome!! You were right all along. joy.gif
Originally Posted by Tear78 View Post

But now I need to say what I logged on to say, because I'm feeling really sad for my Baby B and this is a safe place, and I'm sorry if this is terrible timing to say it. At prenatal yoga tonight I saw two mamas that I went through fertility treatments with, and they're both pregnant with twins. One I knew about and one who is more recent. Both are doing great, and I'm truly deeply happy for them. But it hit me hard as a reminder that we lost our Baby B. And at the same time I'm filled with self-....loathing?....because we love our little girl with everything we have in our hearts, and I am truly, deeply, humbly, joyously grateful for her. And while I was thinking all this that fear came back, that I realize I haven't consciously strongly felt in a while, and I just keep repeating to her "please, please, please keep growing healthy and strong." And the precious darling little one kept kicking me the whole time saying "I'm here, Mommy!" It's all a lot to be feeling at once, but I wouldn't change this for the world. Please, little girl, stay with us, stay healthy, keep growing strong!

Oh, Tear. Isn't PAL awful? And it has to be compounded by the fact that you're carrying the twin still. Allow yourself to grieve, even if it's in some small way, whenever you can. It's weird to say, and I didn't believe it once upon a time, but somehow it does get easier. Or at least more distant. I used to sleep with Avery's baby blanket every night. Now I can't tell you how long it's been since I did that. I still think about my babies, but life has a funny way of moving on whether we'd prefer it to stand still or not. And then, wham! out of no where something will still hit you when you least expect it. I was crying during nap time today b/c I miss the babies I'm never going to hold and I'm petrified for this baby. It's not an easy ride. I'll say a prayer for you. hug.gif
post #62 of 230

MBA - two babies! Wow. I went back to your post several times last night just to look at the picture. I am so happy for you.

post #63 of 230

 I'm in tears of joy for you MBA, to see healthy strong heartbeats helps sooo so much. What a relief for you!! Now on to feeling those kicks!

Also in tears of sadness for you Tear, I had a coworker who lost a twin and 13 years later when she told me the story (after my first m/c) she got misty eyed about that little life that wasn't there.

Thinking of you Amanda!

We've all been through the ringer (often more than once and for a long time) and we all have at least one wonderful reason for being here! 


Hugs all around from me and Asher!


Photo on 2011-04-12 at 18.08 #5.jpg

post #64 of 230
OK, so I hardly even lurk anymore but did a drive by and just wanted to give Tear a hug hug.gif there!
I see babies all the time that are the age my mc'ed babies would have been and it sometimes makes me feel awful. Then my frickin' fabulous (No really I swear, you have NooOoOooo idea) son runs up and tells me he loves me and then runs off again. Sniff..See I'm tearing up now. Gah! I'm turning into a girl! Ok OK get it together breathe...there
Then of course I have the guilt of obsessing over the babies that should have been when I have superfabulous boy right in front of my face. The poor kid has had a mother who has had at the very least half her brain on TTC or mc or something that isn't him for 2 1/2 years...coming up on 3.

He told me out of the blue that he wants a brother and a sister. Jeezus bawling.gif and it's so funny, as a mom you want to give them anything they want and I just can't seem to do it. So I need twins 'cause I gotta give him what he wants.

Well this is the 5th cycle since the last mc so that means I'm pregnant...I decided
(Oing any second or just did, my chart's being retarded...or my body I dunno) It's only cd 12 and my temp shot up this morning. irked.gif

...and MBA I am so frickin' happy for you I can't believe it. I mean it must be incredible to be lying on that table and just hoping they're going to tell you they see a heartbeat only to find..... :grin joy.gif
post #65 of 230
Quick post to update on the appointment this morning. They took my history and did some blood work. They'd only do hcg and progesterone. Wouldn't even test my thyroid unless the doctor say when she gets done with her surgeries, so maybe she'll notice how pitiful my history is and want me to come in sooner. Anyway, I should know today's bloodwork results by tomorrow. And I do go back Friday to make sure the hcg is going up. I hate this waiting game. greensad.gif
post #66 of 230
Update on the blood work - hcg (at 4w4d) was 583 and progesterone was 15. The nurse said that's a good progesterone level, but she said whether the hcg is good or not depends on if it doubles or whatever tomorrow.

Tomorrow will be 4w6d which is the date of my earliest m/c, so it's my first milestone to get through. PG-wise I feel fine today, but I did develop a sore throat overnight at work and a headache today. So I called in to work tonight. Hoping if I get some extra sleep my body might kick this.

This thread is too quiet. How is everyone?
post #67 of 230

MBA Congratulations!


I'm too exhausted to do personals (insomnia has returned), but sending my best wishes to everyone, especially those for whom the week has brought bad news. 


I am fine - 31 weeks now! Critter still moving up a storm and I am actually contemplating the idea that I may have a healthy child at the end of this. My doula has expressed concern that I am not manifesting positive feelings (because I am so worried that I will bloody jinx myself if I do) and she essentially ordered me to go to BRU and buy "something. Anything!" So I bought a four-pack of yellow onesies. It actually did make me feel a little better.


This week I had chiropractic (scoliosis plus pregnancy equals lots of discomfort) and acupuncture, which felt great. Although Critter became very quiet after acupuncture - to the point where I don't think I'll do it again during the pregnancy. I've read lots about how labor tends to be shorter if you have weekly sessions right at the end, but frankly, my mental health is too fragile for me to withstand the constant "Have I hurt the baby? Why isn't s/he moving?" thoughts. I'll just have to tolerate a tough labor...


I'm actually reading all about labor at the moment and trying to drum up some enthusiasm for breathing exercises, etc. Trying to get enthusiastic about the prospect of a natural birth, like I had with my daughter, but the truth is, after everything we've been through lately, I don't care if a doctor has to hit me over the head with a brick and cut me from pubic bone to collarbone, if it means Critter is OK. I'm sorry, I always feel like people read my posts and think "My God, what is she complaining about now?" And you would be right. I should count my blessings. And I will. In 9 weeks time..(and thanks to all of those people IRL who have casually mentioned the hundreds of women, or so it seems, that they know who've lost pregnancies right at the end because of cord accidents. Really. Just what I needed to hear.)

post #68 of 230
Thread Starter 
Hi Ladies! You are so absolutely wonderful, and I haven't had even a second to log on and tell you that. thank you for your support and understanding! Hubby and I are packing the car for a 5-day fishing trip that we SOOOooOOOoooOOOO need. When I get a second I'll log on again and respond properly. (sorry for saying that AGAIN). Love and hugs!!!
post #69 of 230
Originally Posted by lavatea View Post

Update on the blood work - hcg (at 4w4d) was 583 and progesterone was 15. The nurse said that's a good progesterone level, but she said whether the hcg is good or not depends on if it doubles or whatever tomorrow.

I just got Friday's hcg level. It was 1,234 so it is rising appropriately. The doctor also now wants me to keep my appointment tomorrow, which makes me happy, although I'm not sure what changed her mind. (Scratch that - she's cancelling the appointment tomorrow and the 7 wk appointment and bringing me in next week at 6 weeks.) She wants me to continue my baby aspirin and cut out caffeine completely. I have cut down my caffeine intake, but it's going to be difficult to cut it completely. My baby's worth it, though, so I'll do it.
Edited by lavatea - 4/18/11 at 10:00am
post #70 of 230
Thread Starter 
Hi everybody! We came home early after the wash-out rains this weekend: yeah...not so good for stream (aka raging water vortex) fishing. But at least we were able to sneak in a small window of fishing yesterday (during which I educated aka caught and released 5 trout, yay!) and a campfire with burgers...mmmm.....prooooteeeeeiin. I just ate my 17 jellybeans in 5 minutes and I'm waiting to go get my glucose test. Is it bad that I had no problem downing those bad boys well within the time limit? Sheepish.gif

lavatea, that's awesome news, hon! Keep those updates coming! goodvibes.gif Let me know when you feel ready and what you want officially posted on the front page.

mba, how are you doing? Has the news sunk in? Thank you for understanding my ability to feel joy for you and sadness here at the same time. It was very odd timing with the two other twin encounters that day, but I'm doing much better now. I would never feel hesitant to share with you!!! I just wanted to make sure that you felt free to celebrate without guilt. hug2.gif Our little girl has been clunking around like a boxer this weekend, so that has definitely helped us focus on the joy.

slylives, I think what you're feeling is totally normal, hun. I think we've all had enough bashing to understand the fear. Don't worry about expressing it here, that's what we're here for! I tend to also have a modified view of an ideal childbirth experience. Honestly, for me it's baby healthy, mommy healthy, whatever way that needs to come. Just remember how strong this journey has made us, and take strength from that. And seriously...people need to shut up. IMO, stop them as soon as they start to tell a birth story: no thanks, I'm trying to focus on creating my own experience with birth. For what it's worth, I've been getting acupuncture frequently throughout the pregnancy. It always makes me feel calm and relaxed, so maybe your little critter is feeling the same way, aka, not as mobile. Do what feels right to you, though!

jessica, thank you for your kind words. love.gif Asher is a DOLL! loveeyes.gif

enigo, darling! Your little cutie is SO lucky to have you for a mom, and don't you forget it!!! It is not your fault that you have been put down this crappy long road, and you've been an awesome mommy to him. hug.gif I've decided that you're pregnant, too. C'mon, pregnancy tests, get with the program and get warmed up!!! goodvibes.gif

ok, I gotta go...sitting still is hard after all those jellybeans. upsidedown.gif
Edited by Tear78 - 4/18/11 at 11:22am
post #71 of 230


Edited by miriam_bat_avraham - 4/21/13 at 7:01pm
post #72 of 230

MBA - EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!! TWINS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! joy.gifbroc1.gifcarrot.gifbanana.gif


Sorry, I'm going to be excited for days about that! I stalked lava over here because she said on the regular BSL thread she'd be updating over here, and about lost it when I saw your signature! So excited for you!! (Also jealous you could give your two weeks at work... I've only got 5.5 more weeks of the school year, and I'm not pg, but I wish I could quit nowwwww!)


Lava - Glad again to see your good numbers. :)


Okay, I might need to stay away from this thread because I'm officially 10x more antsy about Friday getting here.

post #73 of 230
Originally Posted by miriam_bat_avraham View Post


I want Lavatea updates, too! How are you feeling, Lav???

Well, pg wise I guess I'm ok. No morning sickness yet, but that doesn't surprise me. It never seems to hit me until like 8 weeks. Although I wish I had it just so I'd feel even better mentally about this baby. I don't seem as hungry lately. Maybe that means something. I was having lower back pain yesterday so I was really scared, but nothing happened and I feel better today.

So I'm counting down the days until Monday, and I swear if they change my appointment again I'm going to lose it! The nurse did call yesterday and said the doctor wants me to come in today for more bloodwork. I didn't quite catch what tests she said (combo of bad cell reception and her soft voice) so it'll be a surprise today, lol. One of them was something about anticoagulation, so IDK.

MBA - You're so lucky! I wish I could quit my job. Actually, I really just wish I could drop to part time. I like the job, but I'd like to be home more.

Tear - I'm still holding out for the first page until the sono next Monday. I'm glad you said something, though, b/c I had forgotten.
post #74 of 230
Just a quick update to let you know what blood work they did today (no results yet): Cardiolipin IGG, Cardiolipin IGA, Cardiolipin IGM, and a Lupus test. I'm getting more and more anxious to meet with the doctor! I'm glad she has ordered these tests, but I'd like to talk to her to know her thoughts. Hard to guess just from the stuff she's doing. Anyone know anything about these tests?
post #75 of 230

Holy Cow!!!  I haven't been stalking here for a week or so and just stopped by to see how all of you ladies are doing and all I can say is.... WOW!!!!


MBA - Congrats Girl!!! broc1.gifbanana.gifcarrot.gif  That is so awesome... twins!!!  Glad to hear you are able to quit your job and just be at home and forget the extra stress!  joy.gif



Lav - Congrats to you too Girl!!!  broc1.gifbanana.gifcarrot.gif.  Sending you lots of sticky, healthy vibes goodvibes.gifThose beta numbers sound great!!!

post #76 of 230

OMG, I've missed lots haven't I???


Miriam Twins???!!! CONGRATS!!!! How are you feeling? The MS started kicking in pretty bad around 8 weeks for me. I'll be stalking you!!


Tear- :hug mama, I'm thinking about you.


Lavatea- congrats!!!! Can't wait to hear about your U/S!


Everyone else! Sorry I haven't been around, it's craziness around these parts here lately.


Quick update on us:

For all of you that asked I've been doing great. I'm already down to PP weight with all the nursing, so I'm super happy about that. The boys are doing wonderfully, nursing like champs and growing like weeds! They're about 10lbs 4 oz now at 5 weeks. They come to the office with me all day every day, I work on the computer and nurse most of the time. Have some EBM on hand in case I'm with a client and they're hungry, but so far *knock on wood* they've only taken a bottle once. Trying to schedule clients around approximate feeding times :) We just had a newborn photo shoot, where as expected, one behaved while the other didn't the entire time. I'm getting sleep, Cael usually sleeps from 10:30 to 5:00, and Tristan usually wakes up twice to nurse (we call him our little chunker, because he looks bigger than his brother).


My oldest DS is wonderful with them, can't resist kissing them EVERY time he passes them, which is usually cute, but not when he wakes them up from a nap... :) Cloth diapering is also going well, I mostly use PFs and covers, but they're starting to really leak through, so thinking I'm going to add some doublers, because cleaning poop off of EVERYTHING when there's a blow out is NO FUN, especially at 2 am.


Anyway, I think that's about it for me, here are some pics of them at their one month photo shoot :)


Cael on the top, and Tristan screaming on the bottom :)



Daddy, Cael, Tristan, Mommy and Big Bro Logan:

IMG_9332.jpg TRISTAN:

IMG_9285.jpgIMG_9325.jpg Cael and Logan 

post #77 of 230


Edited by miriam_bat_avraham - 4/21/13 at 6:57pm
post #78 of 230
Mba- I have seen pictures of you and your breasts, I don't think you will have any trouble breastfeeding those twins. redface.gif. (Just kidding, but I can't find the laughing smily). Seriously though, Congrats on quitting your job.

Nannette - I love the photos!

Lava- I came over here to stalk you. So happy to hear you are still doing well!
post #79 of 230

Nanette, BEAUTIFUL!!!  love.gif


post #80 of 230
Nanette SQueeeeeeeeeeeeeee joy.gif They are so cute!
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