The hardest thing about parenting a baby is . . . .

[Snapdragon]

Anyone want to join my whine thread? Just complain a little?! Even though of course we LOVE our little ones and they are amazing etcetera etcetera,  of course we also know that it is very hard to raise a baby! So vent with me a little. what is the hard part for you right now? For me it is- being so TIRED!!!! We co sleep (sidecar) and it feels like I am on 24/7 lately- ugh. I just need a break from him sometimes. I am starting to look for a babysitter. I am feeling like I am short circuiting.

What is your challenge?

[McGucks]

Second vote for the sleep issues.  I haven't had more than two hours in months and months.  It causes stress between me and DH, but we have done a good job with working through it together.  And, I'll add two of my favorite things about being a parent:  1) waking in the morning (this morning it was 4:50) to see his little eyes looking up at me, and 2) that sweet, sweet moment when he falls asleep peacefully in my arms.

[Terrilein]

It's not just the lack of sleep that knocks me out. It looks like I'm developing tendonitis in both arms, mostly the right one though. It just reminded me of how hard it is to be a good parent (or parent at all) to your little ones when you feel like crap yourself or you're not able to function 100%.

Also, solo-parenting sucks. Especially when you're ill and have no family around.

[osker]

The shrieking stage. I expected the sleep thing, and the continuous energy drain, and the constant advice from everyone... but I did not expect to have a kid who loves to scream at the top of her lungs!  It's so exhausting and really gets under my skin after a while.

[zenmumajen]

The hardest thing for me is just parenting in general. Since we raise Leo so differently than those around us we get constant questions on why we are doing it this way or, shouldn't you be doing that? OR I hear about people talking about it behind OUR backs. It is so frustrating for me to have to defend the way I parent. I know most of the time people have my child's best interest at heart but sometimes people just don't like it because they didn't so it THAT way so clearly we must do it THEIR way. I think it will get easier as my son gets older. Raising babies is so political sometimes...

[P.J.]

Those times when I just want some space for myself, or to do something....but can't because he needs me there FULLY present, 100% for him alone. My needs come second, which sometimes means until DH gets home or not at all.

I sometimes resent not being able to just spontaneously do stuff anymore, or how much planning just going out anywhere alone without baby, even just to the gym, takes. I rarely do that! There are days I have a really hard time feeling "owned" by someone else.

[Monarchgrrl]

Originally Posted by P.J. 

Those times when I just want some space for myself, or to do something....but can't because he needs me there FULLY present, 100% for him alone. My needs come second, which sometimes means until DH gets home or not at all.

I sometimes resent not being able to just spontaneously do stuff anymore, or how much planning just going out anywhere alone without baby, even just to the gym, takes. I rarely do that! There are days I have a really hard time feeling "owned" by someone else.

I really miss going to the movies or even just vegging out and watching my favorite guilty pleasure tv shows. Now if I want to do that I have to stay up really late. Yeah, not happening anymore! I miss my alone time. And DW is a new SAHM so whenever I'm home we're together ALL. THE. TIME. *sigh* I guess I know why my mom spent so much time in the bathroom. It's the only place I can be alone!

[Knitting Mama]

For me it's the overwhelming worry that I am doing something wrong and that I am going to irreparably hinder her development somehow. And yes, I do have an anxiety issue, so this may be worse for me than it is for the run-of-the-mill first time mom, but it's for sure the hardest part for me.

It's especially tough because her physical milestones aren't where my niece and nephew's were at this age (they were both crawling by 6 months and my nephew was walking at 7 months, and my niece at 10. My daughter is almost a year and not walking yet), and even though my sister and mother don't mean to cause worries for me by comparing them, that is the end result.

[MamitaM]

I'm moving soon, maybe as soon as Friday. I hired a mover for the heavy lifting, but I still have to pack myself on my own and he's not letting me go down to the storage room right now. I'm also a little sick and have no one to take him for an hour so I can sleep.

[zenmumajen]

I have anxiety issues too and can totally relate to this worry. Most babies Leo's age that are my friend's kids have surpassed him in milestones but I know I am doing what is best for him and every baby is different. =)
 

Originally Posted by Cecilia's Mama 

For me it's the overwhelming worry that I am doing something wrong and that I am going to irreparably hinder her development somehow. And yes, I do have an anxiety issue, so this may be worse for me than it is for the run-of-the-mill first time mom, but it's for sure the hardest part for me.

It's especially tough because her physical milestones aren't where my niece and nephew's were at this age (they were both crawling by 6 months and my nephew was walking at 7 months, and my niece at 10. My daughter is almost a year and not walking yet), and even though my sister and mother don't mean to cause worries for me by comparing them, that is the end result.

[lkvosu]

For me, the worst part is not being able to predict what each day will bring. I have always needed a lot of structure and routine to feel sane and balanced. Having a baby, especially a high needs baby like mine, makes keeping a routine pretty difficult. Also, like a pp mentioned, never really having me time to just do nothing. I miss that feeling of having absolutely nothing to do or anyone to take care off.

[Snapdragon]

yes, that feeling of doing nothing is why I am still awake here and lazing aorund surfing the internet and watching dvds at 12:30 at night when I should be sleeping so I won't be utterly exhausted tomorrow like I was today!! It's always that balance of having free awake time versus sleep time- especially when sleep time is next to the baby who could awaken at any moment!  Off to bed I finally go.

[JFTB1177]

I have a newborn, a 2 year old, and a 4 year old... so basically I have no life lol! I loooove my kids but I am exhausted (mostly from the newborn). One night the baby was up crying, my 2-year-old was up crying, and my preschooler was yelling for me because he wet the bed! All at like 3 am. I would say the hardest thing for me about having a baby inparticular is that I worry about everything! I worry anyway ssince I have ocd, but when I have an infant my ocd goes into overdrive, not fun!

[zakdat]

Wow... what a great thread.  All I want to be able to do is get my spring cleaning done.  I want to clear out our office - declutter, get rid of old text books, toss (recycle/compost) old papers we don't need; as soon as I get started, even on the filing, it seems as though someone needs me, even when DH is home and helping watch the kids.  I want to clear out our closets.  Clean out the bathroom cupboards.  Wash my curtains.  And when that's done, have a bubble bath with candles, a book and a glass of red wine - without having my two year old standing at the side of the tub pointing and saying, "BOOOOOB."

[Chloe'sMama]

Trying to do what is right all the time.  Research changes all the time.  Everyone has well intentioned advice.  Makes me crazy.

[whozeyermamma]

The sleep deprivation. There are mornings where I literally feel like I can feel my cells dying. We're having some trouble with our older DD sleeping too - so I basically haven't seen my DH in days - due to kids, work, whatever.

And the difficulty in getting anything done around the house. I'm a pretty OCD person too - having mess and clutter around makes me .

The best part is the look I get when he wakes up - it's like each time he's so ridiculously surprised and happy to see me:  "Oh! It's YOU!! This is awesome! I remember you! I like you!!!"

About the differences in milestones - gosh that is so hard .I have to say it was a gift that DD was so ridiculously advanced verbally - I could see how much it had NOTHING to do with me, what I did or didn't do, what my friends did or didn't do. So the fact that we can barely get a consonant out of this guy - it's a lot easier to let it go.

[MamaMunchkin]

Sleep deprivation and guilt.

Sleep deprivation, baby's fault - guilt, my fault.

All molehills become mountains because of sleep deprivation.  Then feeling guilty because of it.  Hence, the cycle continues ... One would think one would 

become wiser after a few cycles of this ... nope, too tired and sleepy ...  ... not a chance ...

[Greenlea]

Not knowing why they are screaming and crying and doing everything in your power to help them but to no avail.  I hate when that happens.

Sleep deprivation is hard, but I am getting used to it.  The best part is waking up after only a couple hours sleep to see my baby looking up and smiling this huge smile at me.  How can I be mad at him for keeping me up all night after that? :)

[moonmamajess]

Originally Posted by whozeyermamma 

The sleep deprivation. There are mornings where I literally feel like I can feel my cells dying. We're having some trouble with our older DD sleeping too - so I basically haven't seen my DH in days - due to kids, work, whatever.

And the difficulty in getting anything done around the house. I'm a pretty OCD person too - having mess and clutter around makes me .

The best part is the look I get when he wakes up - it's like each time he's so ridiculously surprised and happy to see me:  "Oh! It's YOU!! This is awesome! I remember you! I like you!!!"

About the differences in milestones - gosh that is so hard .I have to say it was a gift that DD was so ridiculously advanced verbally - I could see how much it had NOTHING to do with me, what I did or didn't do, what my friends did or didn't do. So the fact that we can barely get a consonant out of this guy - it's a lot easier to let it go.

(The bolded part)I know what you mean!

The naps are the hardest part for me and my LO. There is just somethin that he hates about going and staying down for a nap! Ever since he was 2 mos old he has resisted naps. He'll fall asleep but as soon as I put him down...the eyes open and the fuss begins! I'm lucky to get one good one hour nap somedays and he's only 6 mos old! I see/hear moms all the time like "Oh their a little over a year and Oh No! I think they're ready for one nap a day!" I'm like "Uh my babe is lucky to get one good nap a day...what am I doing wrong?" Sometimes I just want to sit and read a book with a cup of tea for a couple hours without having to put in a couple hours of work reasoning with him why he needs a nap! ugh!!!
 

I second tho that one of the best parts is seein his smilin face in the morning...Oh and the laugh! The giggles truly make me melt!

[SilverFish]

the worst part for me is feeling SO ANGRY when she is screaming at me. i hate loud noises and having her lose her temper on me is my absolute worst thing. i feel bad about my reaction but i have had moments of us both just screaming at each other... fortunately really really rare, but still ick. mostly when i'm sick, or we're both sick, or i'm on my own at night for some reason. had no idea i would ever feel so frustrated with one tiny little person... i guess cause i feel i can't just walk away and ignore her?

sleep deprivation, no time for myself, those things are hard too, sometimes.