HORRIBLE delivery. FOURTH Degree tears. I HAVE QUESTIONS!!!!!!!!

[kaypea13]

I gave birth to my son, Jayce on Feb 12. My water broke at 930pm got to the hospital at 10pm started pushing at 1050pm and he was born WITH NO PAIN MEDS (SO proud of that! LOL) at 1141pm. He was stuck on my pelvic bone which I belive caused my FOURTH DEGREE tears... OUCH. My Dr. was not on call that night so a different Dr. delivered me. He did NOT help me through any of it and was actually litterly standing in front of me arms crossed and tapping his foot as if he was annoyed. After I gave birth he did not push on my belly or try to get any clots out, just continued to stitch me up. Would not answer any of my questions about my stitching or tears. After that I started bleeding through bed pads within one hour. Couldnt stand up without passing out. The next day luckily a nurse walked in, started to push on my belly and actually stuck her arm up in me (Stitched up and all...OUCH!) and pulled out a blood clot the size of a canteloupe. After that came out, blood came FLOODING out. This resulted in a blood trasfusion. They sent me home the next day with my blood levels still very low. So that same night due to passing out, and unable to breathe, I had to be admitted into the hospital again for yet ANOTHER transfusion. At this point I was scared to death. Had to be put on oxygen. Drs were telling me they were surprised I didnt have to be recesitated(sp?) Also , through these 5 days I could not see my son which sucked because this was special time needed for bonding. I am ok now, but am still having difficulties with standing long periods of time without getting short winded and light headed. And also with incontinece of gas and bowels. Jayce's father is currently deployed in Iraq, returning home in Sept. I'm worried/embarassed about not being able to hold my gas because I don't want Jayce's father to return home to my uncontrollable gas! My questions for you moms are..... How did your fourth degree tears heal? Did it take along time? How long until sex was tolerable? Any of you end up with the vaginal recovery surgery? If you had incontinence trouble how long did it take for it to stop? Also, I am planning on talkink with someone about this Dr. because he ignored simple symptoms and did not do his job, should I consider a lawyer? Any moms get a lawyer involved with a medical case?  I will appreciate all of your answers and would love to here your stories also! I am new and excited to be a part of this group!!