Its time for a TMI thread....weak stomachs need not read lol. - Page 8

[nicolian]

best thread ever.

[kindyll]

Originally Posted by DragonflyMom 
Husband goes "OMG DID YOU JUST SHIT IN THE BATHTUB!?? WHY WOULD YOU DOOOOO THAT!!??"

I laughed so hard I peed.

So much amusement in this thread.  The comfort wipe commercial also cracks me up.  The difficulty of wiping was not something that I was prepared for going into pregnancy for the first time!

[yellowdart]

I don't really have trouble reaching to wipe (long arms!), but between numb fingers and having.. uh.. loose stools every time I sit on the toilet some days and overall pregnancy juiciness, I just get tired and sore from all the wiping.  I take a LOT of showers.  They're great for back pain, anyway.  

[DragonflyMom]

I have more issues wiping for number 1's because of my SPD and big belly...butt is not so hard/painful to reach.

[Izzybelly]

What I find personally amusing is that I used to push the gross parts of pregnancy to the back of my mind, trying to focus on the positive, blah blah blah.  NOW, I find myself searching my brain for what gross things happened yesterday so that I have something to post - almost excited when something particularly nasty crops up!  What is WRONG with me!??! 

[DragonflyMom]

Lol, Im just happy to have found some like-minded people on here!!

As I said when I started this thread, my husband and I have a warped sense of humor so I was pretty afraid this thread would die young and I would be labeled a weirdo (is that so bad?)....glad to see that has not happened!

In other news, last night on the toilet I thought I was done, wiped up and flushed and then Jasper moved and I pooped involuntarily...YAY!

[nicolian]

I wish I would poop involuntarily. Well, not really, but pooping is always so hard for me.

[yellowdart]

Originally Posted by Izzybelly 

What I find personally amusing is that I used to push the gross parts of pregnancy to the back of my mind, trying to focus on the positive, blah blah blah.  NOW, I find myself searching my brain for what gross things happened yesterday so that I have something to post - almost excited when something particularly nasty crops up!  What is WRONG with me!??! 

This thread is the best!

[emmaegbert]

lol! my DH would not find the idea of this thread so amusing if he thought I was posting any TMI about *him*

luckily since I am so blond, the whole hair issue is not so bad. I mean, its there (hairy knees?!?) but I just don't get much, and its basically the same color as my skin. I did a scissor trim (blind) a couple weeks ago on the girlie parts, afraid I wouldn't even be able to manage that for much longer so I know its not all out of control. I am sure the MWs have seen worse... totally sure of it. They don't care.

I totally have to shower to get properly clean butt sometimes. I have decided to stop the iron supps until birth b/c I am so afraid of gross sticky iron-infused poop in the birth pool. And all over me and the baby. ew.

I am so sore and uncomfortable by the end of the day, we aren't having much sex. I can barely tolerate being touched. I get very painful random contractions when I am tired and my hips and back hurt so much I can barely walk sometimes. So... I count it good to get maybe 1-2x per week... blah. After my conference next week, if I am still preggers, we'll make and effort. That will be almost 39 weeks. Side-lying has worked. Other things work too but it has to be quick or I am way too uncomfortable. We moved the 2yo out of our bed but so far the main benefit is just letting me stretch out more.

[Carolyn R]

So after being at the OB office today for a check-up I have one to add to this thread.

Yes, please hand me a cup the size of a shot glass and send me in to leave a urine sample. Are you aware that I can no longer SEE what is happening in the nether parts? I bravely bent over, poised over the potty like some giant aquatic animal out of water, stuck the cup down in the general vacinity and let loose. The good news? I managed to fill the cup! The other good news - there was foaming antibacterial soap for my hands when I was done. Sheesh. What was it you said, Katico - 'All glamour, all the time'?

And for the first time in ages last night, dh and I DTD. I am very glad I do not have the session recorded, although it would make for GREAT side-busting laughs someday I'm quite sure. I have gotten positively hubungo this time (I am only about 5'2", and I have polyhydramnios. My last fundal height measurement was 48. Yeah.) So anyway, hubby gets all romantic and thinks a little lovemaking would be in order. Talk about a logistical nightmare. Finally, after lots of completely ungraceful maneuvering and failed attempts, we got the job done, but lord it wasn't pretty.

I am so excited for baby and all the pain/suffering has been totally worth it for the end result, but can I just say, "I WANT MY BODY BACK NOW, PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

[nicolian]

Anyone else's hair really greasy and gross all of the sudden?

[yellowdart]

Originally Posted by nicolian 

Anyone else's hair really greasy and gross all of the sudden?

No, because I take 15 showers a day because my crotch is gross.  

[nicolian]

*high five*

[Caracol8]

Originally Posted by Carolyn R 

Yes, please hand me a cup the size of a shot glass and send me in to leave a urine sample. Are you aware that I can no longer SEE what is happening in the nether parts? I bravely bent over, poised over the potty like some giant aquatic animal out of water, stuck the cup down in the general vacinity and let loose. The good news? I managed to fill the cup! The other good news - there was foaming antibacterial soap for my hands when I was done. Sheesh. What was it you said, Katico - 'All glamour, all the time'?

 and   I had to go pee so bad that I was sure the flow would just end up everywhere but in the "shot glass".  Turns out I got it in AND I didn't get a single drop on the outside of the cup.  Dude!  I felt like a magician or something!
 

[RosemaryS-F]

Originally Posted by yellowdart 

No, because I take 15 showers a day because my crotch is gross.  

[Katico]

Originally Posted by Carolyn R 

Yes, please hand me a cup the size of a shot glass and send me in to leave a urine sample. Are you aware that I can no longer SEE what is happening in the nether parts? I bravely bent over, poised over the potty like some giant aquatic animal out of water, stuck the cup down in the general vacinity and let loose. The good news? I managed to fill the cup! The other good news - there was foaming antibacterial soap for my hands when I was done. Sheesh. What was it you said, Katico - 'All glamour, all the time'?

Sheesh, tell me about it!  Although, my problem isn't getting it in the cup, it's getting the cup down there in time!  With my rather urgent bladder (remember my last post about not being able to walk fast enough?) and general awkwardness, coordinating pants down/sit down/cup under without starting to pee before I get to the toilet is rather miraculous.  

So, in this constant state of labour watch, I have been checking everytime I wipe, for any signs of mucous or blood.  Right, so, I got all excited today when the tp had bloody mucous on it....until I remembered that literally 30 seconds before, I had blown my nose and then folded and used that tp to wipe with...and my nose has been bleeding a little because the house is dry.....so yeah...I got excited about snot.   

[RosemaryS-F]

Gross, Katico! Ha!

Today when I found out I was Strep B positive (again) the midwife said, "Bummer for you" and I said, "Yeah, literally!" She was embarrassed. Oops.

[Trinket90]

LOL, Rosemary!

My midwife gave me EPO capsules today and told me to take 3 by mouth per day and poke a hole in 2  of them and insert "as close to my cervix as possible" before bed. I'm not too leery about having them stuck up there... but all I can think is, what a gooey mess that's going to be in the morning! As if that area's not gross enough with all the extra pregnant junk!

On another big ole TMI note... I have been super duper gassy the last few days... and strangely find myself wondering if it's a sign of impending labor. I guess any little thing that changes about my body lately I take as a potential indication of something about to happen.

[nicolian]

The smell of the EPO makes me nauseous. I have to clean my toilet daily, 'cause, ya know, I have to get up 4 times a night to pee, slashing it in the toilet in the process.

[DragonflyMom]

OK, so Im not preggo anymore, but I figure as the creator of this thread I should still have posting rights...lol!

I have been collecting some TMI moments the past week.

I had an emergency c-section (BOO!!!! ) on Friday and I cannot even count the amount of people who got a first row seat to my vagina bits...first they came in and shaved me down/wiped me up.

Then afterwards the nurse (who was AMAZING, Im baking her cookies..seriously, there in the oven right now) had to keep coming in and wiping the blood up.

I kept apologizing and she goes "Honey, if I had a problem with seeing a vagina every now and then I would be single"...I loved her soooo much!

Upon regaining feeling and semi-mobility that next morning I discovered I could not comfortably wipe my own cooch....poor husband got relegated to that duty.

Then, this morning, after 7 solid days of no bowel movements, I sit down to pump and I was having some intestinal cramping...nothing odd, I have been having that and gas all week.

I get set up and comfy and start getting some good sprays and BAM!!! 

I realize its a shit and I could not hold it, that was a funny scramble to the bathroom.

I tore off the pumps leaving the flanges attached to me via my nursing bra and ran across the hall to the toilet, dripping milk all the way....so glad husband was asleep for that one.

Oh...and I have gotten peed on twice by Jasper now..sneaky little shit.