5.5 mo old waking every 1-2 hours at night

[bedsharer1015]

Hoping someone can give me some advice.  My son has been waking every 1-2 hours for the last 2 months.  Twice a week he will sleep 3-5 hour stretches and it gives me hope and then we are back on a 1-2 hour schedule again.  He does sleep in my bed and he doesn't always nurse when he wakes up. My MIL is trying to convince me to put him in a crib in another room.  Telling me that is why he is waking up.  I don't want to argue with her anymore and she has made a couple of comments about how what I am doing is more for myself and not for him.  I try and explain how this is done everywhere else in the world and not criticized and so on.

Is anybody going through this or have gone through this before?

I don't think this is a night time weaning thing, since he doesn't eat every time and I really don't mind nursing at night.

I am trying to go back to  a simpler way of mothering and not question every little thing and to listen to his cues but I can not function during the day.  I take a nap with him but then I feel guilty because my house is falling apart!  So looking for tips/advice!!

Thanks!

[LindsayK]

I think its great you are trying to listen to your babe's needs. I just went thru a similar situation with DS who is now 8 months. He was waking up every 30 mins to 2 hours all night long, and I was a walking zombie. He grew out of it, nothing I seemed to do helped. It definitely was easier just having him in bed with me to nurse rather than running to his crib all the time. 

DD co-slept until 5 months, and then she started waking at 5am and wanting to play. I needed sleep, just I'd put her in her crib with a favorite toy so she could play safely and I could sleep. All of a sudden she started sleeping really well on her own, so I think I was keeping her up. So, if your babe is happy being in a crib, give it a try. But, unless its you keeping him up, its probably just easier having your son in bed with you.

Advice? This too shall pass. Eventually your son will sleep more, when he is ready.

Don't talk to MIL or anyone else about sleep problems unless you want their advice. When they ask how the baby is sleeping, say "Oh, you know, like a baby!" and try to leave it at that. For some reason, people love to measure how well the baby is doing by how many hours they sleep at a stretch. Is your MIL getting involved because your husband isn't sleeping? Can you sleep elsewhere while your DS is waking frequently?

Take naps! The house can stay a mess for a while. Make sure you have clean (folding not necessary) laundry, and clean plates to eat off of. Swish the sinks and toilet bowls once in a while. The rest can wait, you need your sleep. And besides, what better in life is snuggling a sleeping baby, and drifting to sleep yourself? :) 

[AZMel]

My son did the same thing until recently (he just had his one year birthday). He still sleeps in bed with us and still wakes up once or twice a night (huge improvement!). I feel really happy that I decided to just wait it out and let him progress at his own rate. One thing we did that I think was helpful was putting the crib next to my side of the bed as a giant co-sleeper (we took off one of the sides). I tried rolling him into the crib after he was done nursing every time. Usually he didn't want to stay there and he would crawl back to my arm to snuggle or nurse more. But now when he gets hot or wants to stretch out he crawls over to the crib because he knows that is "his" space. I don't worry or care about what others think of our sleep situation. My reward is that every night when it is time for bed my son gets excited and goes to bed happy. I find that I am getting more and more sleep every night. Time will definitely help.

[bedsharer1015]

Thank you ladies for the responses!

My husband sleeps fine.  I feel like she has looked down on bed sharing from the beginning since she had put both her kids in a separate room from day one and did CIO.  But I took your advice and tell everybody he sleeps like a baby.  And the open mouthed "oh" responses are kind of amusing! I have even taken to lying to my pediatrician about him sleeping and feeding through the night!  And when I do tell people the truth I make sure I sound confident and I don't give them an opening to criticize.

Sleeping has gotten a little better, for a week straight he has not woken up before the 3 hour mark.  It is amazing what that extra hour does :)

It is nice to hear other people have had this issue and I am not alone. As a first time mom I am worried that I might be doing something wrong even though I am trying to just listen to him.  I realize that I chose to not use a paci and that I BF on demand and that I am the only one that can put him back to sleep and I am okay with that now!  This is not a bad thing! 

Thank you so much!

[Ginger Bean]

My 7.5 mo son has had all kinds of phases. 4-5 months were particularly bad (there are two big Wonder Week stretches during that time) and then there was a big growth spurt near 6 months. After that, he had a good phase of waking only 2 times from 6pm-6am -- and I snore too!

Of course now he's having separation anxiety and trying to crawl, and sleep is pretty bad. His naps are shot too.

I guess for people who CIO, sleep improvement seems linear -- I don't know, I think people either have to "re-train" or they just lie a lot, because I can't believe crib/CIO babies just sail right through teething, growth spurts, physical milestones, and 4-month and 9-month sleep regressions, etc. while the rest of us experience all the normal and natural development phases.

My mother breastfed me and we co-slept, and she claims I slept through the night from 1 month old. But I've caught her a few times in what seemed like lying. My husband slept in a crib and I think was left to cry, and I know for a fact my MIL lies about how well he slept. If people lie about their current babies, think how easy it is to lie about something that happened 20-40 years ago.

To be honest, I probably lie. Not intentionally or anything, because I'm not ashamed of my baby's sleep, but you really start to forget. It's such a sad thing to me that I can't clearly remember what my baby was like at 4 months. :( It all goes by so fast, and you tend to only remember the high points. I can't tell you how many times he woke up around 4-5 months -- A LOT and it seemed to last forever, but now I can't remember the details. But I remember fondly the THREE nights that my son only woke once in the night. :)