How would you handle this? 8 mos old fighting sleep

[CoBabyMaker]

DD2 is 8.5 months old and has been fighting sleep the last few weeks or so.  I am at a loss because I also have a 2.5 year old.  I can't spend 30-40 minutes trying to get DD2 down for naps and leave DD1 unattended.  DD1 is fine for 5 or 10 minutes but longer than that and she starts thinking I have left or something and calling for me or getting loud.  DD2 used to just nurse to sleep  and me fine but has been having a hard time for a few weeks now.  She had a cold but that is gone and it started before then.  She will fall asleep nursing and when I lay her down she wakes and screams.  Sometimes if I let her hold my finger for a few minutes she will settle and go to sleep but often she just cries at me and keeps trying to get up.  It makes me SOOOO frustrated.  She is clearly tired  but just won't settle, but trying earlier doesn't help either.  I hate that I even know this (sometimes I just get so upset and have to walk away) but  if I leave the room she will sometimes go to sleep in 10 minutes.  I have even tried letting her fuss and just going in if she gets really upset but she just gets more upset each time I go in.   I obviously don't want to just let her cry but I don't know what else to do.  I am at the point that I am starting to feel like 10-15 minutes of her crying alone is better than 30 minutes of her screaming at me and me getting mad at her then being short with DD1 also because I am so frustrated. Please help.

She won't nap in the carrier either.

[CoBabyMaker]

Well, the last few days I have just been keeping her up till midday.  She is totally tired and I have work really hard to keep her from being upset but it's better than her screaming in her bed.    So, I guess for now she is just doing one longer nap in the middle of the day.  I hate that she is so tired and grumpy so I am still open to suggestions if anyone has them. 

[maryeb]

Sorry Mama, that sounds so rough.  Is it warm enough to take a walk outside with your toddler and wear your baby down for a nap?  I know you said she doesn't nap in the carrier but maybe being outside is helpful for that.  Or in a stroller?  Can you keep baby in your toddler's room while you put her down, reading books to both of them or however your naptime wind down works?  Naps were spotty for my toddler when my second was born so I'm not much help here but wanted to throw out a possibility or two. 

[LaLaLou]

I certainly don't subscribe to letting a baby cry it out, but you're not a bad mom if your baby has to cry some before they fall asleep. My 8 month old gets mad when I lay him down when I know he's sleepy. I'll usually lay him down in his bed to fall asleep on his own when he's getting too distracted by me holding him/rocking him to sleep. When I put him in his bed, he'll cry/shout off and on for about 5-10 minutes and then fall right to sleep. I can tell by the way he cries he's mainly protesting as opposed to being distressed and in need of me. If he does get to the point where his cry changes from just protesting to being upset/distressed, I'll go in and get him and try something different. But lately, this seems to be what works best for him. I don't know if that helps. Hope you're able to find something that works for you!

Lara

---

Wife to David and mommy to Ethan

Our Simply Natural Life

[CoBabyMaker]

Thanks you ladies.  I let her just stay up and take one nap a day for about a week.  She was exhausted, cranky, and a wreck.  For the last two days she seems to be taking her morning nap again, fingers crossed.  Of course she is also waking up at 5:45 or 6 am but I can't have  it all I guess.  Hopefully she will continue to go down somewhat easily until she is really ready to move to one nap a day.

[To-Fu]

Naps are rough here too! I have a 10mo and a 3yo. Your big kid might be too little for this yet, but what I do lately is give mine a book or something to do quietly in bed next to me while I put the baby down for his nap. It mostly works.

Best of luck! I know how tough it is.

[eemacd]

Hi CoBabyMaker,

We have an 8.5 mo boy and he just went through the same thing.  I read the Wonder Weeks and 8 months or so is a "Dark Cloud" time period where baby is more cranky, clingy and crying.  They often don't sleep as well, nurse more, etc...  At first I thought The Wonder Weeks wasn't that useful of a book, but it has been RIGHT ON practically to the day of when our LO's mood changes and he goes through a brain developmental leap.  We can now predict according to the leap schedule when we'll have a rough time.  Like clockwork as soon as he was out of the "dark cloud" phase he's back to taking naps, etc. much more easily.

[Ginger Bean]

Originally Posted by eemacd 

Hi CoBabyMaker,

We have an 8.5 mo boy and he just went through the same thing.  I read the Wonder Weeks and 8 months or so is a "Dark Cloud" time period where baby is more cranky, clingy and crying.  They often don't sleep as well, nurse more, etc...  At first I thought The Wonder Weeks wasn't that useful of a book, but it has been RIGHT ON practically to the day of when our LO's mood changes and he goes through a brain developmental leap.  We can now predict according to the leap schedule when we'll have a rough time.  Like clockwork as soon as he was out of the "dark cloud" phase he's back to taking naps, etc. much more easily.

Ditto everything you said!