Teens and driving - Page 2

[EnviroBecca]

I'm all for swapping the driving age and the drinking age in the U.S.--drink at 16 and drive at 21. That way, kids could learn responsible drinking habits before they become accustomed to driving themselves as a primary form of transportation. Impulsive young people wouldn't be entrusted with operating potentially lethal machinery. Parents could teach their kids responsible drinking habits before they go away to college, without risking criminal charges. Tax dollars wouldn't be wasted on providing gigantic parking lots for high schools. The overall number of drivers would be smaller, reducing pollution and traffic. Drivers' ed wouldn't take up high school class time.

I'm appalled by the number of people who, when I suggest this, say, "But that would be so inconvenient for parents! Then they'd have to drive their kids around to all their activities." Seems to me that's another benefit--parents maintaining interaction w/their teens! But, as we all know, some people think that caring for or interacting with their own children is a terrible burden. :

[granolamom]

YOu know what Becca,
That make a hell of alot of sense.

I guess we did not let our son drive until he was 18 because of just that reason.

At 16, MOST, I know not all, kids are just starting to hang out and "party" with there friends. We just figured that most likely Jon was going to experiment with drinking and the like, why throw tha in with driving..

I kn ow that sounds crazy but I was NEVER one to think,"Not my kid". I have had three neighbors who always thought, not my kid and all the kids have wrecked while drinking or parting before they were 18.

JOn went and got his license the day he turned 18. We paid for six months of insurance and paid for 1/2 of his car. He worked since 16 to pay his half. He has wrecked twice in six months. Luckly not when drinking or partying. Once in the rain at my folks house, right into their car!!!

He now has to ay his own insurance. This has worked for us. Now Kait and Kaci are both saving fo their 1/2 of a car!!! They realize they will not drive until 18. They are not about it but they have accepted it.

Dad and brother are teaching both to drive now.

I know many peole let thier kids drive right at 16. That is great if it works for your family. We just thought it was best if they waited.
Granolamom

[Joyce in the mts.]

I have 3 near-adults who ALL drive...my $.02

They all drive most of our cars...the "kid" car is my '85 Volvo 760...it's a tank, which hereabouts is a good idea. We have actual winter and the driving can get kinda hairy. That car is heavy!

My youngest is 18 and a senior in high school, and drives to school, when his brother, 22, who works at the local ski center has days off. Older bro has his '83 Volvo stationwagon, but it needs work which he is doing slowly and surely...but it is under about 4 or 5 feet of snow just now...so they have to share.

Middle kid college student daughter who just turned 20, has had to drive Dad's Toyota Echo to work a couple times because my Volvo was at the ski mountain, or at the high school, so I guess I have no choice but to trust. But really, they are really careful.

They lost a friend to a drunk driver last winter, and it was tragic. My kids will always think twice before getting fancy with driving. And driving drunk will never be a problem with them....and yes, I AM sure of that. But not all the area kids that were touched by this loss are as wise about the lesson they got from this tragedy. (It amazes me, frankly, that so many forgot so much so fast.)

We do pay the insurance for all, but when my son gets his Volvo on the road in Spring, he will be responsible and that is what he wants....and I am glad. It is time for that, for him.

Every kid is an individual case and maturity is a relative thing...I know adults who really don't get it and that really scares me more than anything. I live in a ski tourist area and the skiers all have SUV's yet, many of them have no clue about driving such a rig... but that is for another discussion...Joyce in the mts.

[Arduinna]

Well I voted no car ect but my dd is only 13 so she can't get one yet anyway. Although she is a teen :-) so qualifies for the poll.

When she is old enough to drive in our state, we will pay for the drivers ed, and insurance and eventually give her a car. I'm glad that we are able to do that for her. I haven't thought about specific driving restrictions at this point. We will probably limit passengers until she has had enough driving practice to be comfortable.

[EnviroBecca]

I just thought of this thread in connection with a story in the local news. We wanted to see how the media covered our local peace march, so we watched 2 news shows on different stations, and both covered this other story:

A local high school basketball star "died in a freak accident", according to the first station. It was "a senseless tragedy". They spent several minutes describing his athletic achievements, popularity at school, etc., but this was the extent of their description of the accident: "He died of blunt force trauma to the head while backing his truck out of a driveway." : The second station gave the story the same basic treatment, but they described the accident slightly more: "He opened the door of his truck in order to see while backing out of a driveway. The door struck a pillar and was pushed into the driver's compartment."

Tragedy? Yes. Accident? Yes. Senseless, *freak* accident? No. If one cannot see out the back window well enough to back up, one cannot see well enough to drive on the street. Opening the door and craning one's head out of it is not a safe way to solve the problem; one should scrape the window or move the stuff in the back of the truck or remove whatever is the visual obstacle. It seems to me that this is just the sort of situation in which responsible news outlets should provide an infographic about what happened and have a driving safety expert say a few words about how to prevent this type of accident. Impressionable teenagers watching this story (and there must have been at least a hundred--his classmates) would thus learn an important lesson about safe driving, just at the moment when they're most likely to take it seriously.

I realize it would be upsetting to his family and friends to see him presented as an example of What Not To Do. But wouldn't that be less upsetting than seeing other people die in the same way because they didn't know any better?

What do you all think--am I way off base here?

[sohj]

I have posted my learning-to-drive experience elsewhere apropros of SUV's etc. (top of this page =>)

http://mothering.com/discussions/sho...0&pagenumber=5


A friend once was telling me of his woes with his daughter and driving. I suggested giving her fancy defensive driving courses as a gift at a nearby race course (racing was part of the program). He reacted as if I had just said she should take up crack. I spent the next twenty minutes getting him to understand what was really in a couse like that. I still think he should have done it. I think she would have enjoyed it and learned a lot. And I think he is not a good driver himself.

Frankly, I don't think drivers ed courses cover nearly enough. I also think EVERYONE should learn to drive a standard. It is NOT too difficult and if it were, that person shouldn't be driving.

Ideally, we would all live somewhere with decent public transport so we wouldn't need cars. Yeah, right.:


edited to add: EnviroBecca...I live by two mottos (well, more really, but these two are foremost in my mind right now) 1-- A smart person learns from one's mistakes, a wise person learns from others' mistakes. 2-- In order to have been old and wise one must have once been young and stupid. --- I definately would use horror stories like that to teach my son. A really scary thought is that those large trucks and suv's are turning up in the used car market now...just in time for teens with little driving experience and none of it in using exterior mirrors to purchase them and haul lots of friends around in something with a high center of gravity.

[ahmom]

My 17 y/o DD has her drivers license but WILL NOT drive without me or her father in the car.

[Pynki]

Do you all remember being 16??!!

We have to take drivers ed here to get a drivers liscense before 18.. But you have to be 16 to take your drivers ed class (or something odd like that) So i did.. I got my drivers liscense when i was 16.. I have never.. (knock on wood) been in an accident.. I drove my family's cars until i moved out at 19... I bought my own car at 22..

I'm just wondering if you all remember 16.. Remember the urge to be away from your parents.. Even the most Ap kids HAVE to want time to be with their friends as who they are.. With out worrying about parental constraints..

We live in a rural community.. When our boys are big enough to see over the steering wheel, and reach the pedals all properly dh and i will teach the boys to drive.. We will always be in the car when they don't have their liscense.. Once they do get their liscense they will already know how to drive.. Will i worry?? Probably, but it is all part of growing up... Growing away from your parents....

This is when your children are becoming adults.. I say let them become who they are ... When our boys are old enough.. They will take the classes needed and they will be allowed to get their liscenses.. Because they deserve that freedom and much as I did when i was 16...

That said.. Both of my sisters (25 and 18 in 2 weeks) did not get their liscenses at 16.. They didn't want to and driving with our dad's wife made them crazy.. No one forced them to get it, but no one said they couldn't either..

Just thought i would throw my .02 in here..

Warm Squishy Feelings...

Dyan

[EnviroBecca]

Yes, Pynki, I vividly remember being 16. I had those urges to get away, and I did it using my FEET. We lived near the edge of a very spread-out town; I would walk to stores or friends' houses (generally walking on the shoulder and scaling fences and having other adventures because it's a pedestrian-unfriendly town) or wander the prairie out past the city limit stepping around the prickly pears. Far better, IMO, to take those risks than to take the much higher risk of killing myself and/or others by operating a two-ton machine, especially when angry or preoccupied!

I think the idea that driving is the only way to be free and independent and that 16-year-olds "deserve" that freedom is a very American concept promoted by advertisers. I don't see any reason why I should buy into it.