Just started with EC with a 3.5 month old, advice.....

[Climbergirl]

So, I just started with my 3.5 month old.  I think today, I caught maybe 40% of his elimination?  It seemed to go well.  I have found that at the first whimper of waking up, he needs to go to the bathroom or I will miss it.  And, within 10 minutes of eating, he has to go.  So, that seems to be a majority of it.  There are a few other times but I have not been able to figure out his cues for that (I have a 3.5 year old running around so sometimes I can't be super attentive).

I am not very good at waking up at night, so we are only doing daytime.  He only poops every 3-5 days and they are HUGE.  I caught the last one and I was super excited.

He does not seem to like the BBLP but I am hoping the cover I ordered for it will come quickly.  I haven't figured out how to use the toilet with him so we are going in the sink right now.

So, I am cueing when he goes.  And we are doing a lot of prefold without cover time as well.

Any other thoughts?  I would like to be a little more settled in with this so that I can "sneak" off and potty him while my ILs are here.  They are a pedi and old L&D nurse and I have already heard that babies can't hold it until they are 2.  But after going through PL with my 3.5 year old (who WILL NOT poop in the potty, argh), I really don't want to teach DS2 to use a diaper and then have him relearn that.  It has been a PITA with DS1 and it does not feel good (we have to all but bribe him to go sometimes and even then, it is sometimes a struggle). 

Thanks :)

[nstewart]

Wow, sounds like you're doing great!  It seems like you're catching all the "prime times" to offer the potty.  I started with DS at 2.5 months and tried, and tried, and tried to figure out his pee cues, to no avail.  I recently went to a EC moms group and all the moms there with DSs said that their DS's didn't cue for pees either!!  So I don't know if it's a boy thing, a coincidence or if we are all just incredibly bad at noticing the cues but don't stress if you don't notice them either.  

What I do other than the prime times, and might suggest for you to try, is to just go on timing.  Offer (at your DSs age) the potty every 30 mins or so for about 30 seconds (to give enough time for DS to relax those muscles).  Just remember to respect any refusal (arching the back and crying, turning away from the potty place, etc.)  Also, be consistent.  For example, I always offer right before DS goes in his car seat, as soon as we return home from being out, right before naps, etc.  I've found that consistency is key.  I'm now working on ECing while we're out and about more consistently, and am forcing myself to do this by going diaper free out of the house.  Now that DS knows I'll offer the potty at the grocery store or mall or whatever, he seems to hold it longer.  So whatever routine you decide on, try to be consistent.

DS is now 8 mos and still not a fan of the BBLP.  We potty him in the sink or toilet mostly.  So don't worry about that.  If you want to start using the potty, look for images online for how to hold DS.  We hold DS under each thigh and let him rest back on our arms and straddle the toilet facing the tank.  I also just bought a Bumbo potty insert and totally love it!  It might just be that your DS is too young to feel comfortable sitting "on his own" so you might be better figuring  out a comfortable hold for him for the time being.

Don't worry about the ILs, just sneak off and take him!  And have some good info ready if it comes up and they're confrontational about it for any reason.  They probably have some useful info on www.diaperfreebaby.org.  For example, most people don't know that half of the world's children are potty trained by age 1.  

Good luck, sounds like you're doing awesome!

[Climbergirl]

Well, yesterday was not as good.  I caught one pee and another very large poo.  But, at least, I am still getting some, right?

DH is not thrilled with the pee and poop in the sink.  But DS2 loves to watch himself and he actually usually smiles when I take him to the sink.  I may try the BBLP in front of a mirror when the cover shows up.  I am wondering if he is too old for the little bucket potty you hold between your legs.

I am hoping today goes better.  I have so much to do today and my ability to multitask is not all that good.

[heatherr30]

Babies may not be able to hold it, but they can certainly learn to release it.  They can also indicate discomfort caused by pressure on bladder or rectum thus giving you a couple seconds more or less to get them to the potty.  You are not PT your LO, you are just helping him not pee/ poop on himself.  Tons of advantages including more comfortable and hygienic for him= less diaper rash.  You can tell your health-conscious relatives that.

Personally my advice though is don't overdo it when in public or in front of others, till you are comfortable with it... I agree it's not something you want to "show off" (cause believe me that is the time you will get peed or pooed on! haha)  If we are visiting someone and DS signals clearly I take him to the toilet for a "diaper change".  I leave the guesswork for times when I am alone though.

My only suggestion would be to give the toilet another try--I really really like this position!  I sit behind DS on the seat, facing the tank so he can lean back against me.  I have come across one toilet seat at a friends that was too small for both of us--if you have this problem you could put a chair behind the toilet maybe?